Effortless (Thoughtless, #2)(82)

I exhaled in a rush, not really wanting to talk about this, but knowing I’d opened the can and Kellan wouldn’t let it go until all of the worms were back inside it. “No, I overheard her and Rita comparing notes.” I said Rita’s name a bit harshly and clamped my mouth shut. God, the harpy was coming out of me today.

Kellan sighed. “Oh…did you know about Rita already?” he whispered that, his voice really tentative.

“Yes.” The word came out short, clipped, and I forced myself to relax.

History…future. I needed to remember that mantra.

Kellan was silent for a second and I nearly wanted to apologize for bringing it up. He spoke before I could. “I’m sorry, Kiera. I never wanted you to have to hear about…them. If I could stop the gossiping, you know I would.”

I sighed and laid back on my bed, propping my feet up. “You don’t have to apologize, Kellan. It’s…water under the bridge, really.” Shaking my head, I tried to change the subject. “What about you, what have you been up to?”

He was quiet a moment, then murmured, “Just shows and traveling.

I’m so sorry I haven’t had a chance to come home yet. With us on the road between shows, there just hasn’t been enough time to fly back to you.”

I exhaled, the sound wistful to my ears. “I know. I miss you…so much.” I closed my eyes.

He chuckled, his voice husky. “I miss you, too. I have the wildest dreams about you. You would not believe the hard-ons I wake up with.” My eyes sprang open as I listened to him chuckle in my ear. My body heated at his words. I imagined his response to his dreams and my response to my dreams. It warmed me that we were both waking up…unsatisfied. “Me too,” I whispered, my face heating worse than my body. He laughed a little more and I slapped my hand over my eyes. “I mean, I’m not hard, but…” I groaned, hating the words that sometimes left my mouth.

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In a low, seductive growl, he murmured, “Yeah, I know what you mean. I wish I was there, to touch you when you woke up that way. I wish I could feel how much you miss me.”

I bit my lip, my fingers running over my mouth. Barely above a whisper, I said, “I wish you were too…”

He exhaled in a groan. “God, your voice…I’m hard right now, Kiera. I wish you could touch me.”

My breath picking up, I heard myself murmur, “I want to.” I had no idea if I meant that I wanted to touch him, or that I wanted to continue with where I thought this conversation might be going.

He paused for a second. When he spoke again, there was a heat in his voice that made me melty and gooey; it made me squirm. “Oh, Kiera…I want you so bad…what do you want me to do?” Covering my eyes, I bit my lip. Oh my God, I could not do this. Feeling moronic, I whispered, “Touch it, pretend it’s me.” Oh God, I wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out again.

I was expecting Kellan to chuckle, but he didn’t, instead I heard some rustling around and I swear—a zipper un-zipping. Oh, damn…

He hissed in a breath, releasing it with a gasp. “Oh, I’m so hard…it feels so good. What now?”

Not believing this was happening, I swallowed. “Stroke it.” I didn’t just actually say that…did I?

He moaned in my ear, his breath faster. “Kiera…God…feels so good…I wish I was wet, though, like I am when I’m inside you.” I groaned, biting my knuckle. Jesus, was he really…? Insanely glad my sister was asleep, I whispered, “Do you have anything that would…?” In a strained voice, his breath hitching, he gasped out, “Yeah…hold on.” I heard a distinctly squishy noise and wondered just what sort of 229



lubricant Kellan had on hand…and why. When he spoke again though, I couldn’t have cared less. “Oh…God…yes, it’s warm…like you. You feel so good, wrapped around me…”

Aching myself now, I moaned a little. He was pretending, maybe I should too? “Do you want to touch me, Kellan?”

“Oh God, yes, please. I need to feel that warm, wet skin…I need to be inside you…”

Holy…hell. I ran my hand down my stomach, but I couldn’t quite make myself go any further. I was far too embarrassed, even alone. Kellan didn’t know that though. “Does it feel good?” he groaned.

“Yes,” I whispered. All of me felt tingly and nice, so that wasn’t really a lie.

His breath increased. “Oh God, I need it harder…faster…”

“Yes, I whispered again. “Do it, do it faster…” I had to ceaselessly move my legs I was aching so bad, but I still hesitated to go through with my end of this.

Kellan, however, was not hesitating at all. “Oh, God, yes…don’t stop…that feels so good, please don’t stop…” I moaned again, re-biting my knuckle so hard I thought I might break the skin. He groaned deep, his breath in a pant. “I want to come…Kiera…come with me…” I ran my hand back through my hair. Oh my God…he really was…

“Okay,” I whispered, my voice husky. “Harder, Kellan, I need more of you in me,” I murmured, my hand drifting back down to my stomach.

That got him going. “Yes…God, Kiera, you’re so sexy, you feel so good. I’m in you…right now…can you feel me? Can you feel how deep I am?”