Don't Look Back(58)

my phone going off. ... Cassie? My thoughts lingered on that for a

moment and then flipped right back to the fact that I had kissed

Carson—really kissed Carson.

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” I asked quietly. He tilted his head toward me, meeting my stare with crystalline eyes. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m not proud of it. Even though you didn’t have that damn necklace on, as far as I knew, you were still with Del. And I’m not big on making out with another guy’s girlfriend. I know I have a

reputation—maybe you don’t remember it.”

“I’ve heard,” I muttered.

Carson snorted. “And you were upset. Shit, that’s, like, taking advantage of you. My mom would’ve knocked me upside the

head if she were alive.”

I smiled faintly at that, but then I thought of Candy and

Trey. Had they been messing around before Cassie and Trey

broke up? Possibly not very important now, but something about

that nagged me.

“Are you pissed at me?” he asked quietly.

Good question. I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to feel. Del

had lied to me. My friends had lied to me. And now Carson had.

Part of me could understand why Carson had felt he had to lie to

me, but it didn’t make it okay. I looked away, putting my thumb

to my mouth and gently chewed at the nail. “I don’t know.” Several moments passed, and then Carson reached out,

pulling my hand away from my mouth. “You should really stop

doing it.”

My face flushed. “Yeah, I guess ... it’s a nervous habit.” “You used to do it as a kid.”

“That’s what my dad says.” His hand was still around

mine, the warmth of his fingers pleasant in spite of the lie. “So

I kissed you?”

“Yeah.”

I nodded slowly. “And you kissed me back?”

“Yep.”

Sending him a sidelong look, I raised my brows. “Well, did

you like it even though you weren’t proud of it?”

A smile pulled at his lips, and a wicked glint darkened his

eyes to midnight blue. “Oh, yeah, I enjoyed it.”

I felt my lips responding to his smile. “Well, that helps me

not to be too mad at you.” I pulled my hand free and reached for

the door handle. “You ready now?”

Carson nodded, and we climbed out of the truck. He went

to the chain, lifting the rusted metal high enough that I could

easily dip under it. He moved in front of me, and I followed,

mulling over what I’d discovered. Truth be told, I really didn’t

know how I felt about his lying to me. And that wasn’t even the

most important part of what he’d told me.

Why had I been crying after leaving Del’s?

Del had lied about our relationship—that much was certain. But about what, exactly? Had we broken up? Is that why

I’d taken his necklace off? And most important, did our breakup

have anything to do with Cassie?

Once again, the picture of Cassie and Del floated to the

surface of my mind. But this time it was different. Feelings were

tied to the image. Anger. Disappointment. I knew there was more,

just out of reach, waiting for me to put two and two together. Cassie.

Del.

I stopped beside a prickly bush as a wave of foreign emotions

crashed over me. Cassie and Del...

Having realized I’d stopped, Carson backtracked. “Hey, you

doing okay?”

“Yeah, I just... I don’t know.” How could I explain what

I was feeling—thinking? I tipped my head back. Deep blue sky

broke through the branches. “Do you think Cassie and Del had

something going on?”

“I really don’t know,” he said, leaning against a tree. “I

wouldn’t put it past either of them.”

“Why was I friends with someone like that? How could I

date someone like Del?” Before he could answer, I’d figured it

out. The revelation wasn’t new or anything, but it still stung like

a wasp. “Because I was just like them.”

Carson pushed off the tree and took my hand, threading his

fingers through mine. “You really weren’t. Not always, and you

aren’t anymore. That’s got to mean something.”

I glanced at him. “Second chances, right?”

He nodded and then started walking again, keeping his

hand secured around mine. I tried not to put much thought in it. The path we walked wasn’t much of a path at all. It was an

uneven stretch of land that continued uphill until the two of us

were forced to break contact lest we lose our footing. Pieces of

dirt and small rocks kicked up, rolling down the hill behind us.

Finally we cleared the trees and crossed a grassy patch. Breaking away from Carson, I slowly moved to the edge of

the cliff. Wind, cold and wet, whipped my hair back. Tips of

trees guarded the waterfall below, and like I’d suspected, the fall

was rocky and sheer.