Come Back for Me (Arrowood Brothers #1)(61)

“I went to the jail today.”

“Please tell me it’s because you had some distant relative incarcerated.”

“I talked to Kevin.”

His body goes tight, and I flinch, waiting for the anger and not expecting the horror I get. “Did you think I was going to hurt you?” I start to get up, needing space, but Connor grabs my hips, forcing me to stay. “Ellie, I will never hurt you in anger.”

“I know . . .”

“I’ll tell you until you believe it. Was I upset just now? Yes. Not because you went but because I hate the idea of that asshole anywhere near you. I would’ve gone with you if you had asked. All I want—all I will ever want—is to keep you and Hadley safe, and anything that puts you in danger has me on edge.”

“I was safe. He can’t hurt me there.”

Connor releases a breath through his nose. “Then why are you on edge? What did he say to you?”

This has to be the most uncomfortable conversation in the most uncomfortable position. I’m sitting on the lap of the guy I’ve sort of moved in with who I’m falling in love with and talking about the man I’m currently divorcing.

“He said I was worthless and that he signed the divorce papers. He wants out and wants my bastard of a child not to be his issue. He basically let me know that he’s not at all upset about it and I’m a whore.”

“I’ll fucking kill him,” Connor says through gritted teeth.

I place my hand on his cheek. “And then what? I’d lose you again? Hadley would lose you. He isn’t worth it.”

He closes his eyes and then takes a beat before opening them. “That man will never speak to you again, do you understand? I can’t fucking handle it. He will never come near Hadley, and I swear to God, Ellie, you can’t be alone with him.”

“I have no intention of it.”

After today, there’s nothing left to say. We’ll be divorced since he signed the papers. And considering the charges and judge’s notes on what happened, they’ll sign off on it instead of making us go through mediation. Sydney provided a lot of notes and evidence to support the claim of abuse, including photos. Now that it’s clear he wants nothing to do with Hadley, it’s simpler.

“Just thinking of you being near him . . .”

I can see how distressed he is and I hate that I caused it. “It was something I needed to do. Even though it only confirmed what I already knew . . .”

His eyes, which are full of understanding, meet mine. “I get it.”

“Your father?” I guess.

He blows out a breath and then tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. It’s such a simple gesture, but the tenderness he’s showing even in his anger speaks more than any words can. He isn’t calling me names or yelling. He’s showing me understanding.

“I confronted him more times than I care to count. I could never get through to him, and he felt no remorse for what he put us through, which is why when I left, I never returned. You can’t make monsters see the light, Angel. You can’t show them a better way because the darkness is what calls to them.”

I shift in his lap again, feeling slightly self-conscious that the first time we’re like this, I did it to forget. “Connor,” I say softly, running my hands through his hair.

“Yes?”

“Can we start tonight over? Can I kiss you because you gave me something tonight I didn’t know I needed? Can I lie in your arms as we watch a movie and enjoy that it’s even possible to do?”

He moves his hands to my face, gingerly grips my cheeks, and then brings my mouth to his. This kiss is his and only his. My head swims with the sensations and emotions that he seems to be infusing into his lips. I feel his love, and more than that . . . I feel cherished.

We both deepen the kiss, not knowing where one begins and one ends. My fingers move to his chest, and I revel in the way his muscles flex under my touch.

Then his hands drift down my neck and to my back, grazing the sides of my breasts before landing on my ass. He grips me, pulling me a little higher until I can feel his erection growing.

“Connor.” His name is a prayer.

“I want you so much.”

“I want you too.” And I do, even more when we’re kissing. When I can taste, smell, and breathe all that is glorious and perfect about him. “You make me feel so good.”

“You lead this, Ellie. I won’t do anything you don’t ask me to.” He kisses me again and then pulls back, causing me to whimper. “Tell me, baby. Whatever you want.”

My heart pounds so loudly it makes me dizzy. “Kiss me.”

He does. He kisses me as though it’s the only thing he was made to do. Our tongues clash over and over, driving me crazy. I need more. I want more. I want him to touch me and love me.

“Touch me.” I barely get the words out before I go back to his lips.

He’s the only man who has ever made me feel like this. Never in my life has someone kissed as thoroughly as Connor does. It’s a full-bodied experience, and right now, my body wants more.

I’ve been loved by him before.

I’ve felt him inside me.

And I want to feel it all over again.

Connor’s hands glide up my back and then back down. He breaks the kiss, and we watch each other as his hands move to my chest. Knowing he’s measuring my response, I tear my shirt off, revealing my breasts to him, and then I grip his wrists so I can guide him there.