Can't Look Away(116)

“I know. Yesterday completely exhausted her, I think. She’s wiped. I let her watch Frozen after breakfast, and she passed out five minutes in.”

“You’d think she’d be sick of Frozen by now.” Molly gives a tentative smile.

“You would think.”

She wishes Hunter would look at her, but he stares into his lap.

“I’m so sorry, Hunt. I don’t even know where to start.”

He exhales—a deep, tired sigh. “Are you okay, Molly?”

“I will be,” she says, remembering Jake’s words. But you’re stronger than you know, all right? Don’t ever forget that. “Are you?”

“I’m angry.”

“I know.”

“I’m just … I’m wrecked.”

“I’m so sorry,” she repeats, though the words feel flimsy, futile against the weight of her actions.

“Do you love Jake?” Hunter finally looks at her, his eyes pained.

“Yes,” Molly answers truthfully. She doesn’t want to lie to him; she promises herself she never will again. “A small part of me probably always will. But I’m in love with you, Hunt. You’re the love of my life. It’s a completely different thing.”

He says nothing. Closes his eyes for a long moment.

“I didn’t sleep with him. I swear.”

“But you kissed him.”

Molly nods. “I slipped.” She draws in a breath. “Honestly, when we found out Sabrina’s husband was Jake, when he was all of a sudden in our lives, you and I never really … we didn’t talk about it, Hunter. It was this huge, earth-shattering thing, and you barely acknowledged what was happening. It’s made me feel completely isolated.”

He frowns. “So, what, you turned to Jake?”

“No, that’s not what I—”

“Because it’s been isolating for me, too, Molly. Do you have any idea how hard it’s been for me to watch the way the two of you are around each other? All hot and bothered?” Hunter shifts forward, pressing his forehead to his hands. “But you’re right. I just … I shut down, I guess.”

She reaches for the back of his head, runs her fingers through the neatly trimmed hairs at the nape of his neck. “I understand. I can’t imagine how insanely weird and hard this has been for you, Hunt.”

“But it’s been hard for you, too. We should’ve been talking.”

“From now on, we talk.”

“Deal.” They sit in silence for a few moments. Then Hunter’s eyes lift, finding Molly’s. “Did the kiss mean anything?”

She blinks. “I could say it meant nothing, but that wouldn’t be true. It meant something for the person I left behind when I got pregnant with Stella … when I stopped writing … when I moved out here with you. That was wonderful, but it happened so fast—I became a mom, then a wife, and all in one second. Jake and I—” She swallows. “We had unfinished business. And even though I used to think he could’ve tried harder to get in touch—after some time had gone by, I mean—it was my fault for leaving it unfinished.”

Hunter’s mouth forms a thin line. He shifts forward, resting his forearms on his knees. “There’s something I never told you.”

Molly’s eyebrows draw together. “What is it?”

“Jake emailed me, a couple of months after you guys broke up. He sounded really desperate and worried. He said he hadn’t heard from you and wanted to know if you were okay. I never replied. I should’ve mentioned it, but I didn’t. I just … I loved you so much, I didn’t want to risk you going back to him.”

Molly says nothing, absorbing this.

Hunter turns to her, his eyes growing serious. “Would it have mattered if I had told you?”

She shakes her head. The answer comes so easily. “No, Hunt. I chose you then. I choose you still. You’re my husband.”

His expression softens, but there’s still worry there. Molly hates that she’s done this to him, that she’s the cause of this deep, anxious pain in the person she loves most.

“Is it finished now?” he asks. “Your business with Jake?”

“Yes. I promise it is.” She reaches for his warm, steady hand. “I love you. You’re the one I want, but I—” She hesitates.

“What is it?”

She blinks up at him. “That person I left behind, Hunt? I miss her. It’s not about Jake, it’s truly not, but I … I haven’t really felt like myself here. In Flynn Cove, I mean.”

“I know.” Hunter sighs, rubbing his temples. “And I’ve been selfish.”

“That’s not what I—”

“No, listen. It doesn’t matter where we live, okay? We can go somewhere else. I just want you to be happy.”

“I’m not saying Flynn Cove is the problem.” Molly pauses. “I don’t know that it is. I mean, yes, there are some insufferable women in this town, but when I stop being so negative, I realize that there are also some really great ones. I think the problem is just … me.”

Hunter is silent for several long beats. Finally, he turns to her and stands. “I want to show you something.”