Between Hello and Goodbye(74)

“You know it’s six. You’re being weird.”

“I have to go. Something’s come up. Just go take a bath or something and remain calm. Don’t do anything rash. Maybe…don’t leave your house. Once the awards excitement is out of the way, you’ll have a much better handle on things.”

“I guess,” I muttered. “But you’re right. I’ll get through this weekend and then…”

Then I’ll rip my heart out of my chest and airmail it straight to Kauai.

“Of course, I’m right. When have I ever steered you wrong?” Silas was saying. “Gotta run. See you soon.”

And then he hung up on me.



Sunday, I prepped and prepared for the Clios. The official invitation and notice of my nomination were right there on my bathroom vanity on hard paper stock, printed in gold leaf.



Entrant Company: Zuma

Medium: Fashion and Beauty

Entry Type: Fashion and Beauty Marketing

Creative Director: Faith Benson



I ran my fingers over my name. I thought I’d be nervous or even anxious about possibly winning one of these suckers, but all I wanted was to get through the night and talk to Asher. Tell him that I loved him. Just throw it out there and even if he was still upset with me, at least he would know.

Around five, I dressed in a body-hugging, black sequined halter dress with an oval cutout at the bust and a black ruffle of tulle at the calf. I pulled my hair into an updo, and because this probably wasn’t going to happen again, I went extra glam with a dramatic smoky eye and red lip.

Fire engine red…

The door buzzed at six o’clock on the dot.

I hit the intercom. “Come on up.”

I unlocked the door and left it open a crack while I checked myself in the living room mirror to make sure I didn’t have lipstick on my teeth. Footsteps sounded at the entry.

“Hey, Si,” I called. “I’m not nervous but I’m getting there…”

My words died to see my firefighter barge through the front door, devastating in a dark gray suit, and crimson tie over a white button down.

“You’re not Silas,” I murmured.

“Your date canceled. I’m filling in.” Asher’s gaze swept over me. “Jesus, Faith…” He swallowed hard. “You look so beautiful. So fucking beautiful.”

“So do you,” I murmured, in a daze and wondering if this were a mirage or if this were real.

Asher took a hesitant step forward. “I’m so sorry, Faith, I shouldn’t have let you go. I shouldn’t have driven you away. I was a mess and didn’t know what I was doing.”

“Me neither,” I whispered. “I’m sorry I walked away. Ran away, honestly.” My smile wavered. “I’m shocked I didn’t twist another ankle.”

“I didn’t give you much choice.”

“I think we were both afraid of saying what we really felt, because…it’s a lot, Asher. How I feel about you…” My own throat had gone dry. “It’s so much that it scares me, and I didn’t know what to do with it all. When it sounded like you wanted to end things, I jumped at the chance to go back to my old life. But I can’t. That door is closed and locked forever.”

“Mine too.” His smile was pained. “Can I kiss you now? We have more to talk about, I know, but Christ, Faith…”

He took another step toward me, but I took a step back. “Wait. I…I have to tell you something.”

“Okay.”

“I did a bad thing.”

His expression froze. “Okay…”

“Two nights ago, I went out and partied with Viv, and I don’t remember much but…I woke up in another man’s bed.”

Asher stared at me.

“Nothing happened,” I said quickly. “I know that sounds ludicrous, but I swear to God nothing happened. He…he was a complete gentleman, and we didn’t even kiss because it turns out all I could do was cry over you.”

“Okay.”

I huffed a breath. “Asher, you have to say something besides okay.”

“Well…” He blinked and shook his head. “I mean, I don’t love that, but technically we were broken up.”

“True, but even so… I hate it. It was stupid. Just me trying—again—to turn around and go back to the life I had. But I can’t.” I glanced up at him. “Do you believe me when I say nothing happened?”

“Well…Yeah. Of course.”

“You do? I mean, it’s the truth. I don’t want to be with anyone else, and my drunken self knew to say it out loud when my sober self couldn’t.”

“Knew to say what out loud?” he asked. His eyes were so beautifully dark and rich.

“That I… Oh God, okay, here goes.” I swallowed. “That I love you. I’m crazy in love with you and I don’t want to ever take a break or be apart or spend one more night without you beside me because I love you. Which I said already but I’m going to say it again because I’ve never said it before.” Tears filled my eyes. “I love you, Asher.”

Asher stiffened and then relaxed, as if my words struck him and then took a moment to sink in. And then my firefighter’s face transformed with an expression I’d never seen before. Something so breathtaking, I could hardly believe that the emotion that radiated from behind his dark eyes and hard angles was all for me.