Beautiful World, Where Are You(57)
That morning, while Felix was at work, Alice had a phone call with her agent, discussing invitations she had received to literary festivals and universities. While this phone call took place, Felix was using a handheld scanner to identify and sort various
packages into labelled stillage carts, which were then collected and wheeled away by other workers. Some of these workers greeted Felix when they came to collect the boxes, and others didn’t. He was wearing a black zip-up, with the zip pulled right up, and occasionally he tucked his chin under the raised collar, evidently cold. While speaking to her agent, Alice made notes on her laptop in a draft email with the subject heading ‘summer book dates’. After the phone call, she closed that email and opened a text file containing notes for a book review she was writing for a literary magazine in London. In the warehouse, Felix was pushing one of the tall steel stillage carts along an aisle of shelves illuminated by white fluorescent bulbs. Occasionally he stopped, squinted at a label, checked his scanner, and then scanned the item and placed it into the cart. Alice ate two pieces of buttered bread from a small plate, cut up an apple, made herself a cup of coffee and opened a draft email to Eileen.
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Felix finished his shift at seven in the evening, while Alice was cooking. On his way out of the warehouse, he texted her.
Felix: Hey sorry but im actually not gonna be there for dinner Felix: Heading out w people from work
Felix: I wouldnt be any fun anyways bc im in foul humor Felix: Might see u tomorrow depending on how wrecked I get Alice: oh
Alice: I’ll be sorry to miss you
Felix: Not in the form im in right now believe me Alice: I like you no matter what form you’re in
Felix: Well you can send me a love letter on here while im out getting locked Felix: And ill read it when I get home
Alice put her phone away and for a few seconds stared blankly down into the empty kitchen sink. Felix told his friend Brian he could give him a lift as far as Mulroy’s and then he was going to drop the car home and walk in. Alice passed the following few hours preparing a pasta sauce, boiling water, laying the table, and eating. Felix drove home, fed his dog, showered quickly, changed his clothes, looked at Tinder, and then walked into the village to meet his work friends. Between the hours of eight p.m. and midnight he drank six pints of Danish lager. Alice washed up after dinner and read an article on the internet about Annie Ernaux. Around twelve, Felix and his friends got in a minivan taxi to a nightclub outside town and sang several verses of ‘Come Out Ye Black and Tans’ on the way there. Alice sat on the living room couch writing an email to a female friend of hers who now lived in Stockholm, asking about her job and her new relationship. At the club, Felix took two pills, drank a shot of vodka, and then went to the bathroom. He opened Tinder again, swiped left on several profiles, checked his messages, looked at the BBC Sports home page, and then went back out to the club. By one in the morning Alice was drinking peppermint tea and working on her book review, while Felix was on the dance floor with two of his friends and two people he had never met before. He had an easy and natural way of dancing, as if it cost him no effort, moving his body lightly into and against the beat of the music. After another drink he
went outside and threw up behind a wheelie bin. Alice was lying in bed by then, reading over the messages Felix had sent earlier, the screen of her phone casting a greyish-blue light over her face. Felix took out his phone at the same moment and opened the messages app.
Felix: Hey
Felix: You up?
Alice: in bed but awake
Alice: having fun?
Felix: Ill be honest alice
Felix: I m yipped out of my tree
Felix: And I did haveto throw up
Felix: But yea good night so far
Alice: well, I’m glad
Felix: What are u doign in bed
Felix: Weairng anything or?
Felix: Describe
Alice: I’m wearing a white nightdress
Alice: I hope we can see each other tomorrow Felix: Yeahhhh or
Felix: I cojld get a taxi back to yours
Felix: Now I mnea
Felix: Mean
Alice: if you want, of course
Felix: Yea are you sure?
Alice: I’m awake anyway, I don’t mind
Felix: Cool
Felix: See u soon
She got out of bed and put on her dressing gown, turned on a bedside lamp and looked at herself in the mirror. Felix called the taxi company, went back inside, got his jacket, ordered another shot of vodka, swilled it around in his mouth, swallowed, found Brian and told him to tell the others he was heading off, and then went to get in the taxi. Alice opened his profile on the dating app where they’d first met, and read his bio note again.
On the way out to her house, Felix was having an involved conversation with the taxi driver about the relative strengths and weaknesses of the current Mayo GAA side.
When Felix pointed out the house, the driver asked if his parents lived there.
Nah, it’s my bird’s place, said Felix.
In an amused tone of voice, the driver replied: Must be a rich lady.
Yeah, and she’s famous. You can Google her. She writes books.
Oh yeah? You’d better keep a hold of her.
Don’t worry, she’s fairly keen on me, Felix said.
They pulled into the driveway then. Turning around, the driver said: She’d want to be, letting you knock on her door at two in the morning. State you’re in. I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re calling me again in a few minutes when she’s had a look at you. Ten euro eighty, please.