Anxious People(39)
The pistol didn’t seem to bother Estelle, but on the other hand she seemed to be such a kind person that if she were murdered she’d probably have taken it as a compliment that someone had noticed her. Using a paper handkerchief to dry the tears, the bank robber said quietly: “Yes, please.”
“We’ve got limes!” Ro called out, pointing at the bowl on the coffee table, full of at least a couple dozen. Limes seemed to be such a popular adornment at apartment viewings that it’s tempting to think that if real estate agents were banned, the surface of the earth would become covered with such a thick layer of limes that only young people with very small knives and an inexplicable fondness for Mexican beer would survive.
Estelle fetched a glass of water, and the bank robber raised the mask slightly so as to be able to drink it.
“Is that better?” Estelle asked.
The bank robber nodded gently and handed the glass back to her.
“I’m… I’m very sorry about all this.”
“Oh, don’t worry, dear, it doesn’t matter,” Estelle said. “I have to say, I think it was smart of you not to have come here to steal the apartment. Because that wouldn’t have been very clever, would it, because the police would have known where to find you straightaway! Was it the bank across the street that you were planning to rob? Isn’t that one of those cashless banks these days?”
“Yes. Thanks. I noticed that,” the bank robber replied through clenched teeth.
“Smart!” Zara declared.
The bank robber turned toward her, losing control altogether and shouting the way you do when the kids start arguing in the back of the car again: “I didn’t know, okay? Anyone can make a mistake!”
Roger, whose instinct whenever anyone shouted, regardless of context, was always to shout louder, shouted: “All I want is information!”
So the bank robber shouted: “Just let me think!”
To which Roger shouted: “You’re not much good at being a bank robber, you know!”
Whereupon the bank robber waved the pistol and shouted: “Luckily for you!”
Ro quickly stepped forward and shouted: “Okay, everyone stop shouting now! It’s not good for the baby!”
Which of course was perfectly true, babies find shouting unsettling, Ro had read that in the same book that had told her that pregnancy was a shared journey. After this pronouncement she turned to Julia as if she were expecting a medal. Julia rolled her eyes. “Really, Ro? Someone’s pointing a gun at us, and you’re worried about a few raised voices?”
In the meantime Estelle gently patted the bank robber’s arm and explained: “Yes, those two are going to have a baby together, you know, even though they’re from… well, you know.”
She winked at the bank robber as if that were all she needed to say. It didn’t seem to have worked, though. So Estelle adjusted her skirt and changed tack: “Well, I don’t see why we have to fall out. Can’t we start by introducing ourselves instead? My name is Estelle. You never said what your name is.”
With a tilt of the head and a gesture toward the mask, the bank robber said: “I… look… that’s not a great question to ask me.”
Estelle nodded apologetically at once, and turned to the others.
“Well, then, perhaps we should assume that our friend here wants to remain anonymous. But you could tell us all your names, couldn’t you?” she said, nodding at Roger.
“Roger,” Roger muttered.
“And my name’s Anna-Lena!” Anna-Lena said, accustomed to not being asked.
“I’m Ro, and this is my wife, Juli—OW!” Ro said, clutching her shin.
The bank robber looked at them all, then gave a brief nod.
“Okay. Hello.”
“So now we all know each other! Lovely!” Estelle declared, so delighted that she clapped her hands. And for such a slight person she could clap her hands surprisingly hard. Which isn’t a great thing to do in a room in which someone is holding a pistol, seeing as everyone thought that the sudden clap was a pistol shot and threw themselves down on the floor.
The bank robber looked at the prone bodies in surprise, then, with a scratch of the head, turned to Estelle and said: “Thanks. That was very helpful of you.”
* * *
Anna-Lena was lying curled up on the carpet by the sofa, and had trouble breathing for half a minute until she realized that was because Roger, when he thought he heard a pistol shot, had thrown himself on top of her.
31
Witness Interview
Date: December 30
Name of witness: Estelle
JIM: I really am very sorry about all this. We’ll try to get you home as soon as possible.
ESTELLE: Oh, don’t worry—to be honest, this has all been rather exciting. Not much exciting happens most days when you’re nearly ninety!
JIM: Of course, yes. Well, my colleague and I would very much like to ask you to look at this drawing. We found it in the stairwell and we think it shows a monkey, a frog, and an elk. Do you recognize it?
ESTELLE: No, no, I’m afraid not. Is that really supposed to be an elk?
JIM: I don’t know, I really don’t. To be honest, I’m not sure it really matters. Would you mind telling me what you were doing at the apartment viewing?