Why Not Tonight (Happily Inc. #3)(55)

“Don’t go there,” she murmured to herself as she finished logging in several new art pieces for the gallery.

She glanced at the clock and saw it was close to noon, then grabbed her phone and texted Silver.

You around? Can I talk to you?

Silver texted back almost immediately. Sure. I’m at home. Want to come by?

Natalie replied that she would be there in five minutes, then grabbed her bag and headed for the door.

“Hi.” Silver let her in. “You okay?”

“No. We have to talk. Can we go upstairs?”

“Sure.”

Silver locked the front door and led the way up to the second-floor loft apartment. They sat at the table and chairs by the window. Silver looked more curious than concerned.

“Do you want something to drink? Water? Tea? Vodka?”

Natalie tried to smile but failed. She’d been pretty much holding it together until right this second. Suddenly she desperately missed her mother and wanted to break into tears.

“No, thanks,” she murmured as she struggled for control. “I’m sorry to barge in like this but I didn’t know what else to do. I’m a mess.”

“I can see that. What’s wrong?”

“Remember when I went up the mountain to Ronan’s house and got stuck for those several days?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Ronan and I really got to know each other. He’s great, you know. He’s a bit of a brooding artist, but less than you’d think. And he cooks. He can pull a meal together better than I can. It’s kind of—”

“Natalie, honey, get to the point. And if that point is to tell me that you and Ronan are seeing each other, the whole town already knows.”

Natalie swallowed. “It’s not that.”

“Then what is it?”

“We’ve been sleeping together and I have that stupid baby app and he knows about it and he used a condom, but I’m not on anything because there hasn’t been a guy in like forever and I didn’t think I was anywhere close to breaking my losing streak but now we are and I didn’t even think about birth control until a few nights ago and I’m afraid it might be too late because my period is late and I’m terrified I’m pregnant and that will ruin everything.”

She had more she wanted to say, but she’d run out of air and had to stop to suck in a breath.

Silver’s expression was more kind than anything else. “That’s a lot.”

“I know, right?”

“The baby app is a complication but I doubt Ronan will think you got pregnant on purpose. Finding out you’re pregnant can be a life changer. That I know for sure.” Her gaze sharpened. “Wait—your period is late, but you don’t know if you’re pregnant or not?”

“I haven’t taken the test.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t want to know.”

Silver smiled. “That’s mature. You do realize that your pregnancy exists or doesn’t exist, regardless of the results. Finding out for sure won’t change the biology of it all.”

“I know, but once I have the information, I have to deal with it. I’m not ready for that. I enjoy living in blissful ignorance.”

“I’m going to lovingly disagree. If you enjoyed it you wouldn’t be over here, freaking out.”

Natalie wanted to say she wasn’t even close to freaking out but got her friend’s point. “I’m scared. I really like Ronan and being pregnant with his baby will ruin everything. I don’t know that he’ll assume I trapped him, but he won’t be happy. How can I not be on birth control?”

“How could he not ask if you were?”

Natalie brightened. “You’re right. He should have asked. So that’s something I can throw in his face, but still. At the end of the day, I’m the one having the baby, not him.”

“How long do you plan to ignore the problem?”

“I don’t know. A few more days.” She brightened. “If I don’t get my period before Saturday, I’ll take a pregnancy test then.”

“It’s only Tuesday. That’s a long time to live in uncertainty. I’d want to know right away.”

There was something in the way she made the statement. Had Silver gone through something similar?

No, she told herself. Silver was strong and self-actualized. She would never make that kind of mistake. Silver had her own business and controlled her destiny. Natalie was the only idiot in the room.

“I can wait.”

“Then you have your answer.” Silver studied her. “You’re going to keep the baby, aren’t you?”

“If I’m pregnant? Of course. I wouldn’t give it up. I’m capable of being a single parent.”

She wasn’t exactly sure how but she had the memories of how great her mother had been with her. Surely she could learn from that excellent example. Plus, she had friends. Pallas was pregnant. They could go through it together. Only Pallas was sick all the time. Natalie really hoped that didn’t happen to her.

“Is Ronan capable of being a father?” Silver asked. “Like you said, he’s a bit of a brooding artist. Honestly, I don’t get the appeal. Give me a normal guy who enjoys sports and I’m all in.”