Vindicate (Insight #5)(30)
“Did you – did you just see all of that?” I asked , feeling my cheeks turn crimson. Frantically I twirled my ring, letting my nail slice into my tender skin. Control. I had it. At least for this moment.
“No,” she promised , echoing truth.
“I don’t understand this seeing thing.”
She folded her hands in front of her. “Seeing the living is hard ; all you can see is their perception . I f you’re wise , you will look around them and find your own conclusions. The dead are simpler ; they have no secrets.” She sighed. “Don’t worry about anyone seeing what you don’t want them to – if you hide it from yourself , you hide it from them. Your deeply personal thoughts are locked in a vault in your mind w h ere only you and the one that created them can see.”
“Madison couldn’t see me, how come?” I asked , understanding the frustration she must have with me . I t had to be like not feeling Drake, or any dark soul in Esterious.
“I would consider that a blessing , ” Nana said , trying to smile. “Sometimes our souls are wise and blind us from what we should not see. I don’t think it’s a good idea for either of yo u to see each other now or ever.” Her eyes danced across my face. “I understand Scorpios are a bit jealous.”
“She’s a Scorpio?” I said with a smirk . I was so right about her. “What would I feel if I could feel her?” I asked carefully.
“A very confused girl who is hiding from her fate.”
Sounds familiar. “Why? Why does she hide?”
“Would you not hide from yours if you had the choice?”
Lying was a reflex. “I had a choice . I faced it.”
“Not in this life, Willow. Whether you believe it or not , you felt connected to Drake long before your nightmares had a face.”
I couldn ’t overcome how eerie it was that she knew so much about me. I felt v ul nerable , and I didn’t like it at all. “What you just said to me , ” I nodded toward the doorway that Brady and Olivia had left , “w hat you just did to Brady – that could be seen as an invasion of privacy. Some people may not want you to med d l e in their thoughts.”
I felt her intent to choose her words more carefully around me . I felt bad for causing her to put up that wall. When did I become so rude? If my mother knew I was acting like this I would never hear the end of it.
“True . One would argue that feeling others ’ emotions, seeing intent, feeling truth could be an invasion as well.”
“Very true,” I said , smiling for the first time since Landen had left. “I’ve said that before.”
“Right.”
“You see my past – do you see a different choice I could have ever made ?” I asked , daring to know if that were the case.
Her eyes fell to my chest to where the blade had pierced my heart , t hen they rose to meet mine. “No. You have made choices that no one should ever be asked to, and as my grandson so poetically said , you made them with the grace of a queen an d the heart of a warrior. You prevailed.”
“I’m not a queen , ” I said gruffly , know ing that fate had given that title to Madison . Whether she liked it or not.
“Yes , you are . I n your heart , you are a queen , and your king needs you to be strong – to fight for him.”
I felt a familiar anger rumble inside of me , then reflect in the sound of thunder. “If you truly see me , then you know it is Landen , not Drake , that I love with my soul.” I let out a breath as I dug my nail into my skin. I didn’t mean to let that emotion slip out.
“Correct , ” s he said , looking to the window , then to me. “But right now – you are going to have to save them both…you are going to have to do this because I don’t think Madison is ready for your world.”
She said save not love. It felt so good to hear that . “She is the one , ” I stated bleakly. “Fate demands that she helps me with this.”
Nana tried to smile , but the concern in her eyes wouldn ’t let her. “Neither you or I know that for sure ; only they will.”
“Why do you think she is not ready ?” I asked . Maybe it was me. Maybe Madison knew I tried to love them both. That would make me mad if the tables were reversed.
“Because I know who is in her dreams. I know the destiny she is refusing to seek. I know that she has herself consumed with Charlie’s fate – with Draven’s , but truth is that all of you, every last one of you , need each other.”
“What is going on with Charlie?” I asked . To me that girl looked solid as rock. Like someone I would need in my life.
Nana held my gaze. “Charlie mad e a choice many, many years ago. She chose Draven’s soul, and the one she left behind wants nothing more than for her to…reconsider.”
“Sounds familiar , ” I mumbled .
Nana laughed under her breath. “You remind me of her ; in fact , you are a perfect combination of both her and Madison . The only diffe rence is your soul is old – more focused on your intent.”
“If she lived many years ago , she is an old soul , ” I corrected respectfully. Not to mention it was clear to me that her intent was to help Draven through his hell.
“Many – not millions , ” Nana said , raising one eyebrow. “Listen…I don’t think seei ng is going to be hard for you. You are very aware of energy and the emotions behind them . Listen to what they say to you, and when you step into The Realm , do not fear what you see…it is only time you must endure.”