Uniting the Souls (Souls of Chicago #6)(17)

When I’d sent Isaac and Hudson off the night before without me, I’d been torn between wishing I’d gone with them and hoping that the two of them would hit it off so I’d be free to move past whatever strange thoughts I’d been having and get back to my usual routine. Seeing them wrapped in each other’s arms in Isaac’s office, I’d thought that I was going to get the second option, but then Hudson had crooked his finger at me, changing everything.

I’d understood in an instant what that gesture meant and it had terrified me because of how badly I’d wanted to say yes. So, I’d run. Would it have been that bad to say yes, though? I knew that most people wouldn’t understand and some would have problems with three men getting involved with each other, but none of that bothered me. Most of the people I interacted with on a daily basis were very open-minded. Even if they weren’t, I knew that would be their problem, not mine.

Hudson and Isaac were both incredibly kind and handsome and my only concern was whether or not I was ready. I knew I needed more in my life than just work, I wanted more than that, but was I strong enough to put my heart out there and take a chance again? “How will you know if you don’t try?”

I sighed as I stood up, my body feeling drained from the tidal wave of emotions and the lack of sleep the night before. I made my way back down the steps, deciding to forego the coffee and go home instead. I slowed my pace as I neared Isaac’s office, wondering what I might find in there, but the light was off and there was no sign of him. My shoulders sagged and I tried to tell myself I was relieved, but the heaviness in my heart told me that it was disappointment I was feeling.

I grabbed my keys and my leather briefcase and then I headed back down the hallway, calling out my goodbyes to a couple of the kids on my way out the door. I pulled out of the parking lot and turned in the direction of home, but as I drove down the familiar roads, I thought about what waited for me there; nothing but a frozen dinner and my TV for company. Suddenly home was the last place I wanted to be.

Making a quick decision, I turned the car around and began heading in the opposite direction. My palms were slick with sweat and my heart was beating furiously as I neared my destination. It shouldn’t be a big deal to go out, especially when I’d been invited numerous times, but I rarely went anywhere besides work and home and I felt a little anxious about going to a new place. I needed to try though, I reminded myself. It was time to start making some changes and what easier way to start than with dinner and some familiar faces?

I’d heard how popular the place was, but I was surprised at how many cars were in the lot and I nearly turned the car around and left. My grip on the steering wheel had my knuckles turning white and I had to take a few deep, cleansing breaths before I was able to convince myself to step out of the car. I opened the front door and my eyes scanned the restaurant. Nearly every table was full and I realized somewhat embarrassedly that I should’ve probably called ahead for a reservation.

I turned to leave, proud of myself for at least trying when I was stopped by someone calling my name. I looked over my shoulder and saw Giovanni Romero making his way between the crowded tables, a giant grin on his face. Giovanni and his husband, Caleb, owned the restaurant I was standing in and both had played a very important role in getting the new Agape House up and running.

Caleb’s family had been longtime volunteers at the center and over the years had become friends of mine. They’d asked me several times to stop in and have dinner, but I’d always assumed they were asking just to be polite. Seeing Giovanni’s surprise and happiness at my being there made me feel badly that I’d waited so long to take them up on the offer.

“Matt! I’m so glad you’re here,” he exclaimed, shaking my hand.

“Umm, thanks, but I was just getting ready to leave,” I told him, gesturing over my shoulder with my thumb.

“Leave? Why?” Giovanni’s face fell as he looked at me.

“I didn’t realize…I don’t have a reservation,” I rushed to explain, stumbling over my words. I watched as his face broke out into a big smile.

“You don’t need a reservation, Matt. Friends and family never need a reservation. Come on,” he said. I started to object, but he was already walking away, giving me no choice but to follow him.

“Caleb will be so excited that you’re here.” He smiled at me as we reached a swinging door at the back of the restaurant and pushed it open. I stepped into the kitchen and my senses were immediately assaulted with the wonderful aroma of oregano and garlic cooking in melted butter. Caleb was standing in front of a huge stove and looked up as we walked in, smiling adoringly at his husband before he turned his attention to me.

“Matt!” he said happily. He walked towards me, using the towel slung over his shoulder to wipe his hands before pulling me into a hug. “It’s about time you came in. What can I get you to eat?”

“Oh, um. I’m not really picky,” I said as Caleb ushered me to a small table in the corner of the kitchen.

“Okay, Curtis will make you our specialty then,” he said, nodding to the young chef who grinned back at Caleb and then set to work. “Gio, will you get the wine, please?”

Giovanni nodded and moved around his husband and I noticed as his hand grazed Caleb’s waist as if he just couldn’t help himself. The two of them shared a tender look and I had to look away as I felt my heart grip painfully in my chest. Caleb must have caught the look on my face because as soon as Giovanni strode out of the room in search of wine he sat down across from me, a look of concern evident on his handsome face.