Unbreak My Heart (Rough Riders Legacy #1)(60)

That’s the conversation I’d expected.

Not Boone telling me he didn’t know how to love.

I clapped my hand over my mouth to stop my anguish from spilling out. My anguish and heartbreak and horror and fury that he didn’t know how to love someone because he’d never had love. Or affection. Or any of the normal exasperation and elation that came with loving someone and them loving you back.

So he’d focused on having a purpose. Did he think only then would he be worthy of affection and love?

No, no goddammit, he’d been worthy all along. How strong his will had to be to withstand a life without casual touches, without spontaneous hugs, without that comfort in knowing you were loved.

Right then I resolved to give him that every day. He would know my touch, even just in passing. He would know his value to me in every possible way so he’d never have to wonder again.

I crossed to the sink to wash away the evidence of my tears. I’d never want Boone to think I pitied him—I didn’t, but I knew that’s what he’d think if he saw me bawling. The last thing I wanted was for him to retreat. I wanted him here, where I could be what he needed.

After I made a pot of coffee, I tossed all the ingredients for banana bread into a bowl. While the oven heated, I mixed the batter, greased the pans and shoved them in the oven, all while slurping down my first cup of coffee. When I turned around from putting the dishes by the sink, I noticed Boone leaning against the doorjamb watching me, looking adorable with his hair sticking up and dark scruff on his face. “Hey.”

I didn’t wait for him to come to me. I nearly had a skip in my step as I skirted the center island and circled my arms around his waist, pressing my cheek against his chest above his heart. “Morning, sleepyhead.”

Immediately Boone’s arms closed around me.

His heart pounded beneath my ear. And the hand running up and down my arm felt clammy—almost like he was nervous.

Of course he’s nervous. He told you things last night that he’s never told anyone else. Things often look different in the light of day.

But for me everything was much clearer.

We held onto each other for a long time.

When Boone tipped my head back and smiled into my face, I puckered my lips for a good morning peck. But he devoured me. He didn’t caress my cheek or my throat or my breast. His entire focus was my mouth, my lips, my tongue, my breath. After ending the kiss, he smiled into my face again. “Good morning, gorgeous.”

I had to reach back for the counter because my legs were as mushy as banana skins.

“Thanks for letting me sleep in. That bed of yours is awesome.”

“It’s even more awesome when you’re in it.” I snagged a cup off the shelf. “Coffee?”

“Sure. What are you making that smells so good?”

“Banana bread.”

“The same kind you used to make?”

I slid the coffee in front of him. “I made banana bread for you before?”

“Once.” He wrapped his hands around his cup. “It had pineapple and chocolate chips in it.”

“I don’t remember that.”

“You made a lot of good stuff for me. And you used me as a guinea pig, so maybe that’s why you don’t remember.”

“All of that?” I waved dismissively. “An attempt to impress the hot, brooding senior I had a major, major crush on.”

“It worked. The sandwich you made me that first day?” He sipped his coffee. “Still the best one I’ve ever had.”

“I don’t remember what it was. I do remember thinking, ‘Boone West is in my house. I’m having lunch with Boone West. Do not be a dork.’”

He smiled. “But you were a dork and that’s why I liked you.”

I liked we could look back. “So do you have to work today?”

“No. Do you?”

“I have a few things to do later, but I can do them from here. I don’t have to go in to the office.”

Boone set down his cup and began to stalk me. “So we have the whole day to do whatever we want?”

“Mmm-hmmm. Got any ideas?”

Then he was right there. He hoisted me onto the counter. “I’ll need to f*ck you at least twice more.”

“Our parts were getting chafed last night and we decided to give it a rest, remember?”

He scooted in until we were groin to groin. “My part is ready to say good morning to your part.”

I kissed him. “Let’s have breakfast first.”

“Then what?”

“Are you antsy?” Are you hinting around that you want to leave?

Of course he read the anxiety in my eyes. “Hey. Not trying to bail on you. It’s just…” His quick smile was just short of sheepish. “Now that I’m your man, am I supposed to clean out your gutters or some other ‘honey do’ list stuff?”

“Dude. I don’t know any more about this weekend couple stuff than you do. I thought we’d probably just…hang out by the pool, or watch football, or spend the afternoon in bed, then eat something.”

He curled his hands around my face. “This all f*cking in stuff is awesome.”

I almost laughed it off, but his intensity…holy shit.

Boone got closer yet, peering even more deeply into my eyes. “That wasn’t a flip response because you suggested sports, sex and food.”