Time Will Tell (Maybe #3)(49)

She was dead because of me, and she died thinking . . . What would she have been thinking? That I didn’t care for her? That I should have been there to protect her? To save her? Maybe before her life faded away she wished that she’d never met me, never wasted her time on me.

She might have been right.

I lift the glass to my lips and drink, the warm liquid sliding down my throat with ease. Since getting out of prison, I’ve been spending some of my time at local strip clubs, and I know everyone thinks I am getting laid, but I’m not. I let them think that. The truth is, I go there to torture myself. I drink; I watch; I keep my mind busy. What I didn’t do was f*ck anyone. I haven’t been with anyone since Mary. It has been years—five to be exact. She doesn’t get to move on and live her life, so why should I? I like the fact that she is the last woman I was with. What I couldn’t give to her in life I am giving her in death.

Rake walks in, a blond woman by his side. I know exactly who she is, because Rake’s been bragging about her ever since the day I f*ckin’ met him. I’ve seen a picture of her, but it seems to have not done her any justice.

Anna.

Just the temptation I don’t need.

Her eyes dart to me as she offers me a small smile.

I don’t return it.

I peruse her body slowly, tempting myself with something I could never have.

When I feel myself harden, I know I need to get the f*ck out of here. Standing up, I down the rest of my drink and place it on the table. Rake is introducing Anna to everyone, and I need to leave before it’s my turn, but my feet don’t seem to want to move.

What is it about this woman? I can’t remember the last time I studied one so carefully. To me, they are all the same, some just come in better packaging. Maybe it is all the things Rake has told me about her over the years? I almost feel as if I know her. She’s even more f*ckin’ beautiful up close and personal. I hear the stories about her. Everything from their childhood antics to what she’s been studying in school. Rake thinks the world of her, and either he’s blinded by her, or the woman truly has a heart of gold. She’s apparently intelligent and sweet, but she also has a wild streak in her. And she has a fiery, tough side from what I hear. An interesting mix for a man like me. Mary was all sweetness, but that didn’t exactly work in her favor—she was just too good for me. With my lifestyle, I need a woman who can handle everything that comes with it, the good, the bad, and, most important, the ugly.

What the f*ck was I thinking?

I don’t need a woman right now. At least not anything long-term. I need a drink and some willing *, not an old lady. Anna is completely off-f*ckin’-limits . I got the last woman I cared for killed. I’m not going to put anyone in that position again. Being with me isn’t safe, and I don’t deserve some poor woman caring about me anyway. Mary got death, but I got a sentence. Not just to prison, but to be alone. That’s my penance.

The smell of a fresh vanilla scent pulls me from my thoughts. Something that doesn’t help with my boner. Great, I was standing here, f*ckin’ daydreaming like a kid, and didn’t make a getaway.

“Arrow, this is Anna,” Rake says, smiling proudly. “Anna, meet Arrow.”

“Nice to meet you, Arrow,” she says, her plump lips curving around each word.

I nod my head. “You too.”

Fuck, she’s beautiful.

I look to Rake and slap him on the shoulder. “I’m going out. I’ll see you later, brother.”

I have no right to be attracted to Rake’s sister.

So what if the moment I saw her, the world around me unfroze?

I don’t deserve sweetness like that.

Rake frowns. “You can’t stay a bit?” He steps closer to me so only I can hear. “I want Anna to feel welcome.”

He doesn’t want her to run scared, I can see it in his eyes. He’s afraid she won’t want anything to do with us, him, or this lifestyle.

A valid concern.

I lick my bottom lip, not wanting to hurt Rake but needing to get away right now.

He saves me. “Don’t worry, you go on ahead.”

“Thanks, brother,” I tell him, flashing him a grateful look. I can’t help myself—my eyes dart to the woman before me, to see her already watching me, a thoughtful expression on her face.

Yeah, that’s not good.

“See you around, Anna,” I manage to get out.

She arches a delicate brow. “You can count on it.”

I leave the clubhouse feeling like something just changed, even though I know it is impossible.

Mary is six feet under, where I should be.

It should have been me. I lead this life. She was just a veterinarian who hooked up with the wrong man. A man who couldn’t offer her anything other than a good f*ck. Not even monogamy.

I don’t need to drag anyone else down with me, what I need to do is to stay away from Anna, the first woman who’s stirred any interest in me in a long time.

I get on my bike and ride away, pushing thoughts of a perky little blonde out of my head.





Chapter One


Anna


“Do you have any plans now?” Damien asks as we walk out of the lecture.

I turn to him. “My ride will be here soon. I’m just going home. I have a lot to do.”