Time Out of Mind (Suncoast Society #43)(41)

“Cool.” She hesitated. “You all right with me doing that?”

“If he is, yes. And I suspect from what he’s said this morning that he will be okay.” A more formal scene, with some D/s thrown into the S/M aspect.

“All right. I’ll feel him out next week. And, seriously, come over any time for him to use the pool and exercise. Oh, duh. Stupid me. I’ll have Cris and Landry move my treadmill and elliptical out there, too. Not much, but at least it’s air-conditioned. And the TV out there gets full cable. I’ll leave the Wi-Fi password and stuff on the counter for you.”

Her trust in him touched him. “Thank you.”

Her tone softened. “Hey, I could see it in him, okay? Last night broke my heart for the poor guy. Once he’s on tour…you’re really going to need to figure out little vanilla things to help keep him grounded. Now that he’s had a taste, forcing him back into that het-vanilla box might break his spirit. No wonder he self-medicated with booze and work. I would have, too.”

“Nooo,” he drawled. “You just self-medicated with work and sadism.”

“Potay-toh, guacamole.” She giggled. “Have fun.”

Aaannd, Tilly was gone.

At lunch time, he didn’t have to go down and get Mevi. He came up on his own and waited for Doyle to get him a test. He seemed a little more subdued now than earlier.

“Can we talk?” Mevi asked.

“Sure. Want me to hold off making lunch?”

“No. I’ll help you.” He headed for the fridge. “I guess I need to start at the beginning, huh?”

“You start wherever you feel you need to start. And keep in mind, don’t censor yourself. I’ll never judge you. Feelings just are.”

He brushed at his eyes and started talking.

And talking.

And talking.

By the end of lunch, Doyle knew all about Mevi’s father’s borderline abusive ways, how he didn’t accept his son’s creative side and tried to force him to be more “manly,” and Mevi’s failed attempts to “fit in.”

Doyle also appreciated the creativity Mevi had used over the years to hide his sexuality from women while preserving his het facade.

And Mevi felt a metric shit-ton of guilt about Bonnie, the band’s keyboardist and vocalist. How he’d basically used her over the years as his beard, usually fabricating some sort of blowup with her when he thought she was getting too serious over him. Trying to play match-maker for her with others.

Nearly two hours later, they were still talking. Rather, Mevi was talking and Doyle was listening.

When Mevi was talked out, he sat there for a long moment. “Can we go over to Tilly’s?” he asked. “To swim,” he added.

Doyle believed in the carrot-stick philosophy of managing clients. He hadn’t had to use the stick to get Mevi to open up this morning, but he certainly wanted to reward him for doing so. “Let’s get our stuff and head on over. She texted me earlier that she wants us to come over next Tuesday for dinner, and if you feel like playing, she will.”

He brightened again. “She will? Awesome!”

It was like, in addition to the hair color, another couple of years had lifted from Mevi’s shoulders.

Like hell would he crush the man’s progress.

Even if it crushed his own heart in the process.





Over the next couple of weeks, Tilly played with Mevi two more times, and each time she used Doyle’s implements. Each time, Mevi went more deeply into subspace.

It seemed to be in direct proportion to how his creative mind exploded in good ways on the back side.

His only regret was that he wished it was Doyle topping him. Doyle always did the aftercare, and part of him wished he could crawl into the man’s bed at home and snuggle with him. He not only trusted Doyle, he felt safe with him in a way he’d never felt safe before.

One benefit though was getting to know the triad so well. Especially hearing stories about Tilly and her vicious, protective nature regarding her friends.

“You really punched him?”

She nodded. “Broke two bones in my goddamned hand.” She smiled. “Terrie set me up, dammit. She could have told me they were there to get married because they’d reconciled, but nooo. She wanted to see Paul get punched.”

Cris snorted. “I can testify Tilly can be mean.”

She stuck her tongue out at him.

Mevi also found himself more able to open up to Doyle, too. And as they now talked every day during and just after lunch, before heading over to Tilly’s for Mevi to exercise, Mevi realized exactly how much of his personal life had been a carefully constructed sham.

A wall.

He wasn’t sure yet how he’d deal with it once he started the tour, but if Doyle was there with him, he knew the man would help him deal with anything.

He only wished it could be more between them, because as stupid as it was, he knew he was in love with Doyle.

Both Tilly and Doyle teased that they had a birthday surprise for him, and early one Thursday night as they gathered around the friends’ dining room table with a cake after dinner, Tilly told Mevi their surprise.

“Doyle’s signed off on this, if you want to do it. Instead of just play tonight, I’m going to give you a full scene, as if you were a submissive, not just a play partner. A deeper taste of what it might be like for you some day with the right partner.”