Time Out of Mind (Suncoast Society #43)(45)

“You’re probably still going to be dealing with anger.”

“Oh, I’m sure I will.” He reached over and touched the box. “But I think now I understand I can get through that, too. I just need to…not avoid it. I did a lot of avoiding. That’s how I ignored the red flags David was throwing for so long. I didn’t want conflict. I didn’t want to fight. I had so many struggles already, it was one too many, and that was dumb on my part.”

“Well, for tonight, let’s have a nice evening. When we finish eating, I have one more surprise for you.”

Mevi didn’t even ask. “Thank you, D.”

Doyle smiled, loving the nickname. “You’re welcome, Mal. Very welcome.”





Chapter Sixteen


Dinner was amazing and delicious. The present from him, so thoughtful and carefully chosen, was a wonderful bonus.

After dinner, Doyle drove them north up Manasota Key to a beach to watch the sunset. The whole time, Mevi struggled and failed to say the words he longed to tell the other man.

Words he’d never said to anyone before as an adult. Romantically, that was.

Still, he chickened out. “You’re not worried about someone recognizing me here?”

“If I was, I wouldn’t have brought you. Less chance of it here than in the restaurant.”

He trusted Doyle. If there was one thing the past several weeks had taught him, he absolutely could trust Doyle.

Maybe more than he’d trusted anyone in his life.

The sun lay low on the horizon and there were maybe two dozen cars parked in the lot across the road from where a boardwalk split the dunes and headed west. He couldn’t see the beach from that angle. Doyle found a parking spot in the shell lot and after they kicked off their shoes, Mevi followed him down to the beach.

He didn’t know what he’d expected, but this wasn’t it. The Gulf lay before them, the sun a fiery orb beginning its dip into the horizon. The sky and a few puffy clouds were painted with nearly painfully pure pinks and blues and purples as they struggled and lost their hold on the day.

He couldn’t ever remember seeing such a vibrant sunset in LA. Other places along the west coast, sure, but never in LA.

Even the fluffy, white sugar sand wasn’t like anything he was used to. They walked, heading north away from the opening from the dunes and away from the majority of the other people.

“I love coming here,” Doyle said. “I always did. I’ve missed it. I spent a lot of hours here during and after my divorce to Kathy.” He sighed. “Part of me wishes I’d never left Florida.”

“Why?”

“Because I lost so much. I cut myself off from my friends. I made a lot of money, but I wonder if it was worth it.”

“We met, though. And you told me to be thankful for the things I can be thankful for.”

Doyle smiled. “True.”

“I’m thankful for you.” They shared a look for a moment before Doyle continued walking again.

He finally came to a stop as the sun remained little more than a glowing sliver above the distant horizon. Mevi stood next to him, inhaling the sweet breeze and unable to ignore the warmth radiating from Doyle’s body.

Maybe he was just hyperaware of the man, now that he couldn’t deny what he felt for him.

Neither of them spoke as the sun finally completed its descent. Down the beach, they heard faint applause and people started making their way back over the dunes. Doyle smiled at him.

“Guess we should head back.”

“Okay.”

It was close to full dark and Mevi knew if he didn’t force himself to say something soon, he was going to lose his nerve. He reached out and touched Doyle’s hand, coming to a stop in the sand and hoping the other man did, too.

Doyle stopped and turned. “What?”

“I don’t want to go back yet.”

Doyle glanced around. There was another couple about a hundred yards south of them, but other than that, they had the beach to themselves now that the sun had set and Mother Nature’s evening show was over.

“Are you all right?”

“We need to talk. I need to talk.” Mevi swallowed hard, the sweet, salty tang of the Gulf breeze washing over him so different than anything he’d ever felt off the Pacific. Better, softer, more pure in some ways.

“Okay?”

He reached for Doyle’s hand again, hooking his first two fingers around Doyle’s. “Maybe I’m way off-base, maybe I’m about to f*ck things up, but if I don’t say something, I’m going to explode and hate myself. I love you.”





Doyle thought his heart might stop, but he didn’t speak, didn’t interrupt Mevi.

“I’ve liked you ever since we first met. I realized as I was playing with Tilly the other night that I liked it, but I didn’t really want to play with her. I want to play with you. Because I love you.” His gaze finally focused on Doyle’s. “I want to be yours. This isn’t some sort of weird bonding with my therapist kind of thing, either.” He went silent.

Doyle had to force the words out. “How do you know it’s not?”

“Because I’ve had counselors in rehab. Gay and straight, even though that wasn’t really a topic of conversation, but I could tell, duh. The one guy had a wedding picture of him and his husband on his bookshelf. I never felt anything for them like I feel for you.” He took a deep breath. “I’m gay. And I’m a submissive. When I looked into the mirror and finally admitted those two things to myself, it was like this huge, angry ocean in my soul suddenly went quiet.”