Thicker Than Blood (Thicker Than Blood #1)(78)

“You wanted to last night!” I yelled, pointing at him. “So, what’s the problem now? No infected around to turn you on? Or was it the other dancers that got you going? Or maybe it was—hey!”

Taking hold of my waist, Alex lifted me clear off my feet and stormed across the room with me half hanging over his shoulder. When he released me, I landed on my back on top of the mattress, and a loud whoosh of air burst past my lips. But before I could do much of anything, even blink, Alex was on top of me.

“This what you want?” He practically growled the words as he jerked down my bra strap.

With no ready response, I simply lay there, glaring up at him as he continued to somewhat violently undress me, even going as far as to rip my new underwear as he yanked it down my legs.

When I was naked beneath him, thinking he would soon kiss me, he surprised me by gripping my arm instead and flipping me over onto my stomach. I tried to push myself upright, but he was already behind me, pushing me back down.

“You want me to treat you like you’re one of the whores here?”

The thought wasn’t an altogether unwelcome one. I wanted to be with him. After weeks of heavy make-out sessions and every night spent lying in his arms wishing we could do more, now that we could, I very much wanted it. I wanted to be powerful, the way Evelyn was, the way she could wrap men around her finger and get what she wanted. I was sick of being the timid mouse…I was sick of being me.

“Or do you want it the way Whitney used to give it to you?”

I went utterly still, unable to even blink as I tried to process what he’d just said to me. What Alex had just said to me. And suddenly I couldn’t see straight, or anything at all, I didn’t know. All I knew is that I was screaming at the top of my lungs, and fighting desperately to twist my body free from under him. Somehow I managed, though I had no idea how. Then I was face-to-face with him, still unable to see clearly, still screaming.

My hand cracked across his handsome face, sending it flying to his right. Unfazed, he turned back to me and I slapped him again, this time across his other cheek. The second slap was hard enough that not only did his head jerk to the side, but his shoulders twisted and heaved as he tried to right himself.

“Feel better?” he asked, rubbing his left cheek as he faced me again.

“No!” I screamed.

I was exactly the opposite of better. How could he have said that to me? What was he thinking, bringing up something—someone—so awful at a time when it was supposed to be just me and him being together for the first time. Could he really not be the sort of man I thought he was? It was a possibility; I’d only recently gotten to know him. And considering it was me and Evelyn who did most of the talking while Alex either grunted or rolled his eyes or spoke in two-to three-word sentences, it was a very good possibility that I didn’t know this man at all.

But I refused to believe that. I did know him, probably better than anyone else still alive today, better even than those who were dead, simply because I knew the Alex of this world, a man who hadn’t existed before four years ago. This man might be quiet and ridiculously gruff at times, but he wasn’t stupid. There was method to his madness; whether it be for survival or showing someone he cared about them, there was a well-thought-out reason behind every one of his actions.

Dropping back down onto the mattress, I tucked my legs beneath me, overly aware of my nakedness, but not ashamed enough to do anything about it. “Why did you do that?” I asked quietly, my voice hoarse.

“You needed it,” he said, and shrugged. “You were pissed off, hurting too, and about to use me to make you feel better.”

“Would that have really been so awful?” I asked, feeling bewildered. “Having sex with me? Because I thought that’s where we’ve been heading…”

God, listen to me. Two weeks ago, I would have never had the courage to ask such a question. In fact, just a few days ago I was shying away from stripping down at the entry gate. Now, look at me. Either Purgatory and all its sins were starting to corrupt me, or I was just that damn angry, hungry, and exhausted from…everything.

I decided on the latter, figuring it would take more than two days to corrupt someone. Or at least hoping that was the truth.

Sighing, Alex scrubbed a hand across his scruffy jaw. His stubble was more of a beard now, something I’d never liked on men before, but on Alex, I liked it very much.

“I’ve wanted to be with you for years,” he said, meeting my eyes. “And now I have you, you’re all mine, Leisel.” Lifting his brow, he looked at my wrist, where his brand shone dark against my pale skin. His lips twitched as a small, satisfied smile appeared. “And your first time with me isn’t going be some bullshit screw.” He lifted his eyes to meet mine.

Three things were going through my mind in that very moment. First, had Alex just told me he’d wanted to be with me for years? And if that was the case, was that why he’d helped me escape?

Second, what was with his “You’re all mine” caveman-type nonsense?

And third, if I’d known how to swoon properly, I would have been swooning. It may have been crudely said and more than a little chauvinistic, but it had been said all the same.

He wanted our first time to mean something.

I’d been right about him. There was always a reason, always a carefully constructed plan of action forming behind his dark eyes.