The Redemption(45)

Firenza invades the good—her arrogant smile, tearing me apart as she stood there mostly naked and called him by his first name like she has a right to. I almost prefer he f*ck a nameless stranger, a groupie, instead of her. She knew I was a passing fancy and nothing more than a challenge he’d taken. Everything about her tone, words, and body language knew she would be with him again.

“Come here often?”

I look up and see Chad Spears standing on the other side of the pump getting gas. “Hi.” He repeats himself, “Hi. Sorry to interrupt the deep conversation you seem to be having with yourself.”

I laugh, suddenly embarrassed. “Yeah, deeps thoughts and all while getting gas. You know how that goes.”

“Sure. I always come up with my best ideas while waiting at the gas pump.” He smiles. “You’re causing quite the stir these days.”

Sighing, I ask, “Online?”

“Seems so. The girl who fought so hard to stay out of the headlines is now making them.”

Glancing at the meter, I have a few more gallons to go before it’s full. “LA sucks like that. I guess I’m not sure why there’s interest in me at all.”

“A beautiful widow, a tragic tale, and a bad boy. Makes for good gossip.”

“Tragic is right.”

“You still seeing Dex?”

My shoulders tense, my answer clipped. “Nope.”

His pump clicks off before mine. He locks up his tank, then comes around to my side and leans his back against my Escalade. “How about that raincheck?”

It’s the most sincere I’ve ever seen him. No guard or pretenses, no audience to perform for or like he’s trying to impress me. Just a genuine smile and a gentle tone. He reminds me of teenage guys who haven’t been defeated by rejection and not tasted enough success to have an attitude yet.

My pump clicks loudly and I reach for it, but he takes the handle before I can and puts it back in place. As I put the gas cap back on, I waiver, thinking I may have judged him because of Dex and maybe that’s not fair. “I do owe you a drink.”

Looking down at his watch, he says, “I’m late for a meeting, but how’s Friday around three for you?”

I’m tired of trying to please everyone else. Chad Spears is not my future, but he may be fun with no commitment, maybe exactly what I need. Wondering if I’m trading one bad boy for another, I decide I don’t care anymore. “That works.”

“Cool.” He hands me his phone. “What’s your number? I’ll text you.”

“Here. I’ll do it.” I take the phone and program my number into it.

“So,” he says all flirty and looking better than he ever has on a red carpet. “Friday?”

“Yeah, Friday.”

With a little wave, he walks back to his sports car and I walk around mine to get in. One more glance in his direction and I smile before he drives off. I follow behind but turn the opposite way on Le Cienega. I immediately turn on music so I don’t have the quiet to over think what I just agreed to. It’s a drink at three, basically the same as a business meeting. The music gets louder, so I let the date and all the heavy thoughts stop and try to enjoy someone else’s rhythm for a while.





Spending time with my boys renews me. There are no other beings on earth that bring me more happiness or make me more proud. As Neil reads to his little brother, I hold them on either side of me, loving the sound of their voices and giggles. After ‘The End’ is read, I give them a bath, letting them play in my jetted tub, which they love. My mind occasionally wanders to Dex, wondering if he’s thinking of me, like I have him. Wondering if he cares how much he hurt me.

By eight o’clock, I’m wiped out just like the boys. My mind even more tired than my body. My heart still bruised. I crawl under my covers and check my phone on my nightstand. There’s a text from Tommy: We need to talk. Call me after the show.

Crap.

I look at the time again. The band is playing in Florida, so they’re on Eastern Standard. They should be halfway through the show if they started on time. I text back: I’ll call you in two hours.

I can only imagine what he needs to talk about at this time of night. I’m sure Dex has told his side of the tale by now and I’m probably the bad guy for breaking his heart. I cringe thinking I might have to talk about this, but they should hear my side before their judgments settle in.

Grabbing my files from the end of the bed, I open them wide, then spread out the contracts for the new offers that were sent over from the main office. Action figures. No. Wine… um, No. Not their style at all. Private jet company. Too flashy. Watches. Maybe. A tour book. Maybe. A documentary. Maybe. A line of athletic wear. No. I gather the maybes and stack the rest back up and place them in the No folder. I’m gonna have to present these in the next two weeks to the guys, which means traveling to see them. As much as I think I can be professional around Dex, I also know my heart isn’t ready to see him.

His betrayal has tainted our past and all of the things that made us special together. Everything has changed for the worse. We weren’t special. I wasn’t special. I was used like so many before me. He had no intention of love, but I believed his words. Now I believe his actions. They speak louder. I just hope I can bear to be in the same room as him.