The After of Us (Judge Me Not #4)(50)

“Jesus.” I take a few deep breaths to calm my racing heart. “What the hell?”

Just then, my cell phone rings.

Grabbing it up from the seat next to me, and expecting the worst, my vision blurs. When I can finally make out Chase’s name on the screen, I definitely know this can’t be good.

“Chase,” I gasp out as I answer. “Jesus, I know something is wrong. Please, just tell me Lily is all right”

“Will,” my brother utters on a pained sigh. “You need to turn around and come back to Harmony Creek as soon as you can.”

Panic rises, pulling my voice taut as a rope. “Chase, is Lily okay?” Silence, and then I’m yelling in the phone, “Chase! Jesus, man, tell me my daughter is okay.”

“There’s been an accident, Will—”

I start backing out of the parking space and almost slam into a passing car. “Asshole,” someone yells.

“Fuck you!” I shout back.

“Will, calm down,” I hear Chase say.

I don’t even realize I dropped the phone.

Shaking my head, and scooping my cell up from the floorboard, I say as evenly as I can, “What kind of accident? Please tell me Lily is fine.” My throat constricts, and I can barely add, “Where is she, Chase? Where’s my little girl?”

I’ve never felt emotions like these—helplessness, despair—as deeply as I do right now. There’s a lump lodged in my throat and I’m sweating, yet I’m cold.

“What happened? What happened?” I whisper, over and over.

Chase tries to calm me with words and an explanation, but the f*cking phone starts breaking up and all I hear are bits and pieces.

“Fell off… swing… hospital… Lily… unconscious.”

And then we’re disconnected for good.

“Fuck!” I throw the phone, and it bounces off the console and lands on the passenger-side seat.

I drive back to Harmony Creek like a maniac. When I reach the only hospital in town, assuming it has to be the one Lily has been admitted to, I careen into the lot, tires squealing, and screech into a parking spot like I’m some cop on a TV show.

And then it’s all flashes, nothing clear.

I’m in the emergency room.

Chase is in the hall.

Kay is next to him.

And Emma is there, as well.

Wait, what’s she doing here?

Ah, she’s keeping an eye on Jack and Sarah in the waiting area. Jack has a bandage on his nose, but looks more or less fine. Maybe he was involved in the same accident, and Lily will come out any minute with just a bandage on her cute little nose, too.

“Where’s Lily?” I ask when Chase meets me halfway down the corridor.

“Hey, I want you to calm down, okay? Flipping out is not going to do anyone any good.”

What? Is he kidding? “Where’s my f*cking daughter, Chase?”

Two nurses walk by and give us tense looks. I realize then that Chase has his hands on my shoulders. He’s holding me back. “They’re checking her over, okay?” he says.

“Is she going to be okay?” My voice cracks.

“We think so,” Chase replies, and I almost collapse in his arms. He holds me steady, and adds, “They won’t tell us much, though. And only a parent or guardian can go in and see her.”

Shit, this is bad.

I push past my brother, but then it’s Emma blocking my way. “Get out of the way,” I grind out.

I’m not trying to be mean, but I don’t have time for whatever it is she may want to talk about, which is probably why I haven’t called her since yesterday morning when I blew her off for breakfast. But when I see tears in Emma’s eyes, and notice her nose is red like she’s been crying, I lighten up. I remind myself she cares for Lily, too.

“Look,” I say, much more kindly, “we can talk later. I need to see Lily right now.”

She starts to cry. “I know, I know. But I have to tell you that I’m sorry, Will. I am so, so sorry. I told Lily not to go too high. And then she was coming down, and…and the swing broke and—”

This is f*cking unbelievable. “What? You were with my daughter when this happened?”

“Yes,” she whispers.

I shake my head. “You took my girl to play on those old, rusty swings, didn’t you?” She barely nods, and I go off. “What the hell were you thinking? Did you do this because you were mad at me?”

“What? No!”

Emma appears shocked. And, truly, I can barely believe myself that I’m spouting off like this.

Chase, sensing I’m about to implode, grabs my arm. “Hey, come on. Let’s go see Lily.”

I shrug him off me and take a step closer to Emma. “Get the f*ck out of here,” I hiss. “I don’t want you around my daughter.”

She tries to touch me, and I jerk away. “Will, please—”

“Seriously, Emma, just go.”

I would never lay a hand on any woman, but I’m so mad at Emma I do feel like screaming some very nasty things at her. Truthfully, however, all this anger is misdirected. I’m mad at myself for leaving Lily. Emma is an easy target because, for as far as I’ve come, it’s still too easy to revert back to my old * behaviors. It’s simpler than dealing with the guilt.