See How She Awakens (The Chronicles of Izzy #4)(43)

Memories came clicking back into place. The darkness, the fight, then the inky void, every thought ending with Uriel. What had he said?

“Izzy?” Aberto appeared in front of me, looking at me warily, as if I were a ghost.

“Why does everyone keep looking at me like that?” Irritation filled my voice.

“You were gone.” Aberto said, falling to his knees in front of me. Relief washing over him as he looked me over, searching for anything that might be wrong.

“What do you mean I was gone?” Confusion washed away as a blinding light exploded in my mind. Memories flooded back in. The Council. The purple flames. Damali and the knife all came rushing back. How had I forgotten being stabbed by that psycho?

My hand lifted to my chest. There was no gaping wound where she’d stabbed me. Quickly, my other hand shot towards my back, trying to feel for the spot where I’d been impaled, but there was nothing.

“Holy crap, that psycho killed me. Please tell me you destroyed her?” Aberto looked at me strangely. “What? I’m not dead, you can stop looking at me like that.”

“Izzy, you have been gone for some time.” Aberto moved toward me. “Where have you been?”

“Somewhere really, really, really dark.” I felt different. I couldn’t quite explain it. There was something missing—or rather, not missing—that had been before.

“Where?” Aberto pressed on. Ever in need of answers. It was like he didn’t believe I was really me.

“I don’t know. Uriel just showed up and told me this is the only place I can exist. He said heaven wouldn’t take me because of the darkness, but hell wouldn’t have me because of my light. Then he shoved his hand into my chest. There was a bright light, and then I woke up on this cold slab.”

Crap, that was right, I was immortal now. Son of a biscuit-eater. I was stuck here. Forever.

“You mean to tell me that you are truly eternal?” Aberto asked.

“Immortal, eternal, it’s all the same,” I mumbled. Starting to be freaked out by the way Aberto was looking at me. “What? Is there something on my face?”

“Izzy, what do you remember?”

“I remember it is super creepy in here. Can we maybe go somewhere less dank and cave like. I’m immortal, not a vampire bat.” I stared around the dark cavern wondering just where in the heck they had stashed my body.

“I must be sure it is truly you. You are not acting yourself.” Aberto moved a little closer. Like that would make a difference. I was beginning to feel like a specimen under a microscope.

“Who am I acting like?” This was irritating. If someone I cared about came back from the dead, I’d been stoked.

“You are acting like yourself, only before the loss. Before the darkness came over you.”

Aberto’s words crashed into me, dragging forth every moment I’d longed to forget. The pain. The loss. Every last second played out in my mind. I gasped for air as the onslaught of pain gripped my heart firmly before letting go forever. Something had changed in the darkness. Realization slowly dawned—Uriel.

Right before I’d woken up, he’d done something, something I didn’t remember until now.

“I abhor the darkness within you, the taint upon your soul. Despite this, I shall grant you a boon. You may never die, you may never pass through the veil to the other side, but I will take from you the suffering which plagues your heart. The memories will remain. This is my gift of mercy, ask nothing more.” Uriel’s last words echoed through my mind as Aberto shook my arm.

“Are you well?” Aberto’s concerned eyes pierced my own.

“I am,” I replied, allowing the memories to pour over me. I had to know.

Kennan’s death played out in my mind anew. I still felt the pain, the loss as his life was snuffed out in an instant. The grief had somehow subsided. The all-consuming loneliness had been replaced with something more. I’d found peace. Somewhere in the course of everything that had transpired, my soul had accepted the truth. Kennan was gone.

If I kept living my life as I had, I wouldn’t be able to survive. Kennan died so I could live. He died to give me the chance to live a full life. And I would. I was going to live the crap out of this life for him. I had a hell of a long time to live it.

“Aberto, it is me. I promise you.” I lifted my hand to his cheek, hoping he could see I was still here.

“Does the grief not weigh heavy upon you?” Aberto moved closer.

“I miss him. I will every day for the rest of my very long life, but no, it no longer weighs heavy upon me.” Tears pooled in my eyes, relief washing away the remnants of grief as the words wrung the last of my sadness out.

“IZZY!” a shout from somewhere above bounced off of the walls. I knew that voice. The tears threatening to spill forth seconds before came rushing out. There was no stopping the flood as Molly descended the stairs, running straight for me.

Struggling, I stood, bracing for the impact of her body as she threw herself at me. Her arms wrapped tightly as she sobbed.

“Molly, I’m okay.” I pulled back, looking her over. There was no sign that anything had ever been wrong with her. She looked perfectly whole.

“No, you most certainly are not. Do you realize you’ve been dead for two months?” Molly pulled back, anger replacing her relief.