See How She Awakens (The Chronicles of Izzy #4)(25)

“No, I haven’t. I left so I could help her.” Anger pulsed in my veins at his words. I knew he wasn’t himself. I just had to keep reminding myself so I wouldn’t slap the moron.

“You are doing a fantastic job.” Sarcasm dripped from his every word.

“If you won’t believe what I am saying, I will show you the truth!” I shouted. Ian was being ridiculous. I could see the darkness had already dug its claws into him. Where it had just been a flicker under the surface the last time I’d seen him, it was now a pulsing entity vying for control.

“You can’t show me anything.” Ian’s face twisted into a snarl as I reached out and grabbed hold of his arm.

The darkness within me urged me onward, a greedy inkling in the back of my mind. Confused by the eagerness of the darkness, I pressed onward. Regardless of my misgivings, Ian needed to see what would become of him if he let the darkness prevail.

“Izzy, what are you doing?” Ian’s eyes clouded as I thrust us into the vision I’d witnessed. Pain ripped through me as the events played out slowly, one after another. Ian’s actions echoed, each event more terrifying than the last, all culminating in the death of Conall.

When the vision ended, pain like none I’d ever experienced pulsed within me. The darkness stretched, growing stronger. Falling to my knees, I heard voices moving around me.

“No, no, I’m so sorry.” Ian’s voice prattled on in the background, over and over again, professing apologies for acts he had not yet committed.

“Izzy, stay with me.” Mona’s soothing voice came from close by. “Sena!”

A hand fell on my shoulder, easing the pain so it was a low throbbing. I opened my eyes to find Sena near tears. She was absorbing my pain, something I wouldn’t ever let happen. I could contain it; whatever it was, she wouldn’t survive.

“Let go, Sena.” I pleaded. “I will endure.” She fell backward as the pain came ripping back through once more.

I grow stronger. You will never defeat me now.

“Izzy.” Aberto’s voice calmed the beast within me. “Do not forget, Izzy. You did this out of love.”

I thought of all the people I cared for in this room. If I let the darkness expand any further, it would destroy everyone within its reach. I loved them, and I would be damned if I let any harm befall them. Gritting my teeth, I pushed the darkness back. The pain faded to a dull throb I’d become all too familiar with.

“Izzy, I’m so sorry.” Ian kneeled down next to me, remorse and fear in his eyes.

“It’s all right,” I whispered.

“All of those horrible things I said to you, it wasn’t your fault. I don’t know what was wrong with me.” Ian’s eyes filled with tears as memories flickered behind his eyes. The closer I looked, the more I noticed, the darkness was gone. He was himself once more, but where had the darkness gone?

A dark laugh echoed within me telling me exactly where it had gone. I’d absorbed it, thus the darkness had grown.

“What happened in here?” Mona asked, rising up to stand.

“She showed me what was going to become of me. The darkness had rooted itself within me, it was twisting me into someone else. Someone I never want to be.” Ian’s eyes sought out Conall across the room. “I won’t ever let that happen.” His focus turned on me as his eyes locked with mine. His promise made, knowing I was the only one who knew what he would become.

“Don’t let it back in.” My voice was shaky, foreign in its frailty.

“Never,” Ian promised. “How did you erase it?”

His face turned white as realization sunk in.

“No, Izzy. Put it back. I can fight it now that I know.” Ian rushed me, causing me to almost topple back over. I’d only just sat up.

“No, you can’t.” I knew it was the truth. None of them could. Something in me was strong enough to contain the darkness, to keep it at bay, in a separate little piece of myself. Like some sort of parasitic organism.

“I won’t let you take that from me. That was my burden.” Ian grew angry.

“Don’t let it back in,” I pleaded as the world around me grew black. Exhaustion fell heavy on me as the burden of what I carried settled into my bones. I wanted to sleep. To rest until I was strong enough to purge myself of the darkness completely.

“What is going on?” Ian’s voice asked from somewhere in the distance.

“She absorbed the darkness within you into herself.” Aberto’s voice hedged on anger as he scooped my body up. I wondered how I could hear everything but not really be there. I wasn’t in the dreaming, but I wasn’t on that plane either.

“But why?”

“Guardian, how can you even ask that?” Aberto didn’t suffer foolishness, and Ian was being unaccountably dense.

“I want to know why she would do that, take more darkness into herself when she can’t control what is already within her.” Ian’s voice came out shaky.

“She did it to keep you from becoming what she foresaw. She cares more for the wellbeing of those she loves than she does for herself. As you already know this, what you seek is forgiveness. That is not mine to give. You have been self-serving in your desires, perhaps the darkness found its way in because of that. I care not for the specifics. I care only for her safety. Thus, if you succumb to the darkness once more, I will not allow her to take it from you. Be stronger, deserve what she did for you.”