Sanctum (Masters and Mercenaries #4.5)(2)

Ryan was aware. He was a mystery to both his staff and the club’s submissives. How could he tell them that he couldn’t sleep with anyone because he was still in love with a woman who had been gone for almost two years? Who he’d given away?

He’d wondered how she was doing with Keith. Had she found a way to care for him? His stomach rolled at the thought of her sleeping with him. It hadn’t been in the deal he’d cut with his former friend. Only her care had been settled. Sex had been up to her. Sweet, deeply submissive Jillian. At least Keith had the money and time to care for her the way she needed to be taken care of. Keith had moved to New York a month after he’d taken over her contract. It was easier that way. He didn’t have to worry about running into them. She didn’t have to know how far he’d fallen. He liked to think of her in designer clothes, walking around Manhattan without a care in the world, following the orders of her loving Master.

What was he going to do when he got his shit together? He was almost there. He was almost ready to start over. He’d lived in a freaking hovel for almost two years, worked a couple of jobs for a while, traded in every favor he could. He almost had the money lined up, and then he would be back in business. But would it mean anything without Jillian there? Could he get everything finalized and maybe negotiate with her again?

“The staff can talk about me all they like. I don’t care. As to your other advice, I’ll think about it.” He couldn’t touch the subs. Not yet. He could spank them and get them off with any number of toys because that was what they needed from him. But what he needed was gone, and it had been his own damn fault. Besides, he didn’t have anything to offer a sub. He was a little better off than he’d been eighteen months ago, but all the reasons he’d had for giving away his sub still applied. He had no extra cash. He had money saved up but that was going into the new business, and the new business would take up all his time. No. He couldn’t take a sub and he couldn’t go after Jillian until his business was well established. By then she would very likely be married and happy. That part of his life was over, washed away in the mess his criminally minded CFO had left behind.

Ian sighed, his eyes narrowing. “All right then. I did what I had to do. Now, I’ve got the applications for the new bar manager. It looks like it’s a bunch of dudes and one chick who’s been in the lifestyle before. Adam ran all the background checks, and I set up the interviews since you’ve been putting it off. You can’t run both. It keeps you off the floor, and I need you there.”

“I’m getting to it.” Ryan knew he needed a bar manager, but he was swamped.

Ian placed a stack of folders on Ryan’s desk and slapped a hand there. “Three of them are coming in this afternoon. I want a new bar manager by tonight. We’re throwing Serena’s birthday party here in a few weeks. Serena. See, perfect example. That was Jake and Adam screwing a client. I told them not to. She’s a writer. She’s obnoxious, and now I have to love her because she’s a damn member of the family. So find me a bar manager. Just because Serena’s knocked up by one of those morons and can’t drink, doesn’t mean that the rest of us should suffer. Your first applicant is waiting outside.”

He looked down at the folders in front of him and a little flare of anger pulsed through his system. “Son of a bitch,” he whispered under his breath. How dare he just set up interviews? Sure he was the owner, but Ryan ran the f*cking club and he did a good job at it.

Ian just stood and smiled. “See, now you feel like a member of the team. We’re not really in tune until we’re calling each other all sorts of names, brother. Hey, and she’s cute. And submissive, but not too much. You should hire her. If not for yourself, then for me, buddy. I like a challenge. Your call.”

Ryan reached for the folders as Ian opened the door. Goddamn it. He didn’t need a bunch of job applicants, especially ones Ian Taggart wanted to screw. But that seemed to be about every halfway decent looking sub who walked through Sanctum’s doors. The last thing he needed was for his bar manager to fall madly in love with the owner. His entire female staff, plus Joe, the bartender, spent half their time swooning over the big Dom.

Ian opened the door. “Hey, Jill. He’s ready for you.”

Ryan’s heart nearly froze. Definitely not for him. He couldn’t hire a Jill. Fuck, he had a hard time just saying the name. He needed to find a good reason to not hire her. He quickly flipped open the file, looking for an excuse to send her on her way, and then everything seemed to stop.

“Ryan? Oh, my God,” a soft voice said.

Jill didn’t just share his Jillian’s name. She was his Jillian.

Ryan just stared as his biggest mistake walked right through the door.



Jill Paxon thought seriously about running the other way. She could make it back to the door and onto the streets of Dallas in mere seconds. She might not even take the time to get into her car. She would just run and keep running. It wasn’t like she hadn’t dropped everything for Ryan Church before.

She couldn’t stop staring at him. Eighteen months. And they hadn’t been terribly kind to him. He looked tired. Gorgeous, of course, but there was a heaviness to his eyes that hadn’t been there before.

Before he’d shoved her off on another man. Before he’d treated her like a piece of property. Of course she couldn’t blame him for that since she’d allowed the whole thing to happen.