Ryder (Resisting Love #2.5)(31)
Which is why Derek has no intentions of letting her go.
Wrong Kind of Love by Amanda Heath
Releasing June 27th, 2013
Chapter 1
GRACE
The water from the showerhead is scalding. It burns along my skin, turning it a lovely shade of pink. I can’t bother to care, since I want all this blood off of me. Its not my blood mind you. No it’s his. I stare as the pink tinged water rolls down the drain. I’m sitting on my ass with my knees pulled up to my chest.
My mind is completely numb.
I refuse to think about the things I have done. I refuse to think about what I have been through. Life throws you shit just to f*ck you up. Well life can take a damn hike. I have had enough shit happen to me in my 17 years that I refuse to let anything else bad happen to me.
“You need to get that blood washed off.” My older brother Aiden’s voice grumbles through the shower curtain. “I have some clothes set out for you. We still have to dye your hair.” I see his shadow lift its hands up to pinch between its eyes.
“Okay.” I whisper. Standing up I grab the body wash off the rack that is hanging off the showerhead. I scrub myself three times, just in case. I want all his blood off of me. What I did was so horrible, but I can’t seem to have any remorse for it. That bastard deserved it. For what he did to Aiden. If only he had wanted me. But no he wanted a boy. Not that makes it any different, but then I could have saved Aiden from the horrible things he did. If only.
I step out and dry off. I wrap the towel around my body when I’m done and sit in the chair that sits in front of my mother’s vanity. “I’m done.” I call out to my brother.
“About time. We have to get out of here like 5 minutes ago.” He picks up the latex gloves lying on the vanity and proceeds to slather my hair with bleach. It burns my scalp and I wince. My hair is a natural honey brown, but I’m going into hiding. I have to become someone different. I have to leave behind everything I love. Everyone I love, well, except for Aiden.
My PlayStation 3.
My weed.
My black all-star chucks.
All my t-shirts with their dirty innuendos.
My baggy jeans with all the holes.
Instead I’ll have to have a completely different lifestyle. I will have to actually get up every morning and do my hair and makeup. I will have to wear designer clothes and shoes. I will have to talk like a complete and total airhead. Jesus I need a joint. I want nothing more than to forget the past couple of hours and get high. That’s the life of a stoner for you though. When life gets to hard to handle, toke it up.
Aiden doesn’t say anything to me while he bleaches my hair. I don’t expect him to. What happened was out of my control, out of everyone’s control. Though we were eventually planning on getting out of this hellhole we call life, things just seemed to have sped up.
I’m going to leave the house I grew up in tonight, or early in the morning, whichever way you want to look at it. Aiden is going to drive me to Arkansas, which is a 20-hour drive straight through. He is going to drop me off at a hotel where I’m registered under Grace Breadfield. (This is not my real name.) When its time I will go to the university of Arkansas in Fayetteville and register for classes. Which is scary because I haven’t even graduated high school yet.
Don’t ask me how this is possible, because I don’t know. Aiden apparently knows someone who hooked us up. Fake ID, birth certificate, social security number, and high school diploma. I do know why he chose Arkansas. No one would look for us there. I have never been there, nor have I ever talked about it. I was born and raised in New York City, so Arkansas is a far cry from home.
Anyone who knows me will tell the police that I wouldn’t go far from New York. This is what I know, where I’m comfortable. My friends would laugh if they heard Arkansas is where I ended up. I have always wanted to be an actress. My mom even paid for classes since I was 5. I know how to speak in a southern accent, and it doesn’t sound fake.
The last few years I kind of drifted from my dream, but now I kind of have to live it. I might not become famous or get paid, but its that or tear my family wide open. This way no one finds out what we are all trying to hide.
“Get in the shower and wash that out. We have to do mine next.” Aiden’s voice breaks through my thoughts.
Its funny how when you’re little and you wish you could run away and live some exciting life, but it never happens. Well Aiden and I were some of those kids and we always wanted to run away together. I don’t know about living an exciting life in Arkansas, but at least we get to do it together. I wish that it were under different circumstances.
“Okay.” I say softly, sticking my head under the bathtub facet and washing out the bleach.
When I’m done I do the same for Aiden and help him wash it all out. We get dressed in our new clothes. It’s funny what you can buy with a lot of money. Something I never indulged in before. I had nice things growing up, but I didn’t out right buy the most expensive things I could. Aiden did and does. Though he knows clothes and shoes, oh and guys. My brother hits for the same team. Not that it’s ever made me love him less.
“You ready to go, love?” Aiden says walking into my bedroom, for the last time maybe.
I stand up off my bed and look into the mirror on the back of my door. I don’t know the girl looking back at me. Her hair is platinum blond and mine is honey brown. Her eyes are dark blue and mine are brown. Her shirt is pink and shows way too much cleavage. While my shirt would have been black and said something like “If its long and hard, then it’s probably my baseball bat.” Her skirt is made of lace and stops about an inch from my knees. I would never be caught dead in a skirt. Baggy jeans all the way for this girl. Her shoes are ballerina flats made of leather I’m pretty sure Aiden got at Prada. I would have on chucks. Never anything else. She also has a Gucci bag slung over her forearm. I wouldn’t be caught dead with a purse.