Rush: The Season (Austin Arrows Book 1)(135)

We stand there for a few awkward seconds and I don’t know what to say. I want more than anything to close the gap between us, maybe throw my arms around his neck, but I’m scared to. I don’t know why he’s here.

“Aww, hell.” Kingston’s through my door in an instant and he’s pulling me against him. My head finds that perfect spot on his chest and my arms go around him. I’m squeezing him, probably a little too hard, but I can’t help it.

His lips brush my forehead and he breathes deep. “God, I’ve missed you.”

Emotion slams into me, clogging my throat, causing tears to spring to my eyes. I pull back and look up at him, trying to read between the lines. I don’t think there are any lines, but I’m trying to form them, anyway. Kingston tilts my head back with his finger beneath my chin, then presses his lips to mine. I lean into him a little, relaxing for what feels like the first time in … forever.

When he pulls back, I realize I’m crying.

He brushes the tears away with his thumbs, his eyes locked with mine. It’s quite possible he has tears in his eyes, too, but my vision is blurry, so I can’t be sure.

“I’m so f*cking sorry,” he whispers. “Ellie… God, baby. I’m…”

I force a smile and choke back a sob. “An idiot?”

“Yeah, definitely that.”

He pulls me in again, crushing me to his chest. I don’t try to pull away, because this is the only place I want to be. The only place I ever want to be.

“I need to explain,” he finally says.

He really does. I’m not going to argue there. He owes me that much. Plus, I owe him some explanations, as well.

“Have you eaten?” I ask.

Kingston shakes his head.

“Good,” I say as I take his hand and pull him toward the kitchen. “Then you can make me dinner.”





56

Kingston

I damn sure wasn’t in the position to refuse Ellie dinner. Nor would I have even if I were. The second I saw her… Let’s just say, it’s a wonder I’m still on my feet. If I were a crying man, I would probably be in tears right about now.

“Wine?” she offers.

I smile, possibly for the first time in a month. “I’ll take a beer if you have one.”

“Of course.”

Ellie opens the refrigerator and retrieves a Sam Adams. I refuse to wonder whether or not this is the same beer James drinks. I force myself to believe that she has this beer because of me.

“So, what’s for dinner?” I ask, coming around behind her to peek into the refrigerator.

“You don’t have to cook for me,” she says, turning to face me.

Looking down into her face, I can’t resist the urge to touch her. My fingers itch with the need to feel her soft skin. I cup her jaw and brush my thumb over her cheekbone.

“I owe you an apology,” I tell her, my words heavy with the emotions churning inside me. “I should’ve never talked to you the way that I did. I should’ve never given you the cold shoulder.”

Ellie smiles sadly. “I owe you one, too. I was so busy worrying about how James’s sudden appearance was going to affect Bianca, I didn’t explain myself to you.”

I shake my head and frown. “Don’t ever apologize for putting Bianca first. You didn’t do anything wrong, Ellie. I jumped to conclusions when I should’ve talked to you. I was selfish…”

Ellie’s eyes widen, but she doesn’t speak. I can tell she wants me to finish.

I swallow hard and decide to tell her everything. From the beginning. “I didn’t come up with the pretend girlfriend plan. Amber did that.” When Ellie nods, I keep going. “I didn’t suggest you. Spencer did that.”

She looks almost disappointed, but I’m not finished.

Brushing my thumb under her chin, I tilt her head back so she has to meet my gaze. “But from that moment on, I wasn’t about to miss the opportunity that had all but been dumped at my feet. For years, I’ve tried to get you to notice me.”

“Oh, I’ve noticed,” she says with a watery smile. “Definitely noticed.”

I kiss her softly, then pull back. “When I thought about a pretend relationship with you, there was never anything pretend about it. Not from the very first day. I’ve wanted you since the first time I saw you. And I’ve wanted you more every single day since.”

“Why didn’t you say something?”

“Because I was a chickenshit. I thought I owed it to your brother to respect his wishes. He didn’t want me to screw up our friendship. I get that. But then I thought about the fact that I may never have the opportunity again. Then I saw Bianca’s Facebook post, and I knew I couldn’t sit back and let this opportunity pass me by.”

“And now?”

A hot ball of emotion is lodged in my throat. It’s the same one that has been pinging around in my chest for the past few weeks. Her eyes lock on my face and I’m lost. So lost. For so long, I’ve tortured myself by staying away from her. Now, as I stand here, cupping her face, I don’t know how I managed.

And this is the moment I realize, without a doubt, that I want to spend the rest of my life with this woman. I am wholeheartedly in love with her. There are no fireworks, no strobe lights or techno music. In fact, the only sound I hear is the rapid thump of my heart in my chest.