Released (The Eternal Balance #3)(48)

“I’m…I’m okay.” I let her help me up. The pain was still there, a pressure in my chest, almost as though someone was pushing on my ribs from the inside. But it was bearable. For now.

It will become worse.

I ignored the demon and forced my feet to move forward. The tunnels were long, but they were easy to navigate. So far there seemed to be just one path. My sense of time had always been shit, but if I had to estimate, we’d walked for twenty minutes by the time we reached the end. The tunnel narrowed, and as we came to the thinnest part, we found that it emptied into a cavern.

“Oh my God,” Sam said, her voice barely a whisper.

“We did it, Sammy.” The stone lay several feet away, in the center of what almost looked like a small version of Stonehenge.

But Sam didn’t answer. She wasn’t looking at the stone anymore. She was staring at me. “It’s not over,” she said. Pink burst from around her head and shoulders. “I have a plan.”

“A plan,” I repeated. Suddenly I understood her reaction to all this. Her lack of despair. She thought she had a way to fix things.

“Sammy—”

She jabbed a finger toward the stone in the center of the grotto. “That thing is crazy powerful, Jax. I think if we can get Van back, she can use it to get rid of Azi. She can—”

“Sam…”

The stone is unable to do that. It is powerful, yes, but it is a part of me. It cannot be used against me.

I shook my head. “The stone can’t do that. It won’t—”

“No!” She fisted handfuls of my shirt and shook me as hard as she could. “You took him from me once. Not again. Not again!” The blows followed. They landed erratically from my shoulders to my gut. One even grazed my chin. I let her rage, let her lash out until her fury-fueled cries had dissolved into soft sobs, and the force behind her attacks was nothing more than a whisper. “Please do something. Fight,” she begged. “Anything. Just don’t leave me again.”

I had nothing to offer her. No solution or soothing words. So I did the only thing I could. I gathered her into my arms and held on like I was standing on the edge of the world, which, when you looked at it, I guess I kind of was.

I will not be able to replace you.

The blue thickened. Sam’s sadness now blanketed everything. Even the stone, glinting off the strange light coming from the cave walls, was lost to it.

I have never felt sorrow so profound.

I held her. She cried. For what seemed like years, we just stood there, at the end of our road and staring down the reaper.

I cannot…I will do it.

What the f*ck are you talking about?

No way was I going to speak out loud with Sam standing right here. Her distress was suffocating, and I didn’t want to give her false hope. Not until I was sure.

I will leave.

Just like that? Bullshit.

You underestimate me. My…emotions.

Demons don’t have emotions. You’ve told me that multiple times.

It appears I was mistaken. I felt Azi focus on Sam, on her pain, and shudder. I could not remain here and watch her die.

You promised me you’d look after her.

And I would. But she would perish all the same. Even now, I feel it. Surely you can as well.

I felt it. I’d been choosing to ignore it, but that had gone over about as well as an Uzi in a church. Since I’d confessed the truth, the weight of it had been crushing us. Had been crushing her.

Let me see if I understand this correctly. You’re saying you’ll move out? Shuffle off the earthly plane?

Correct. I felt a tremor of amusement. For now, at least.

Because of Sam?

I shouldn’t question it. Never punch a gift horse in the balls, right? But the demon had tricked me before. I wanted to make sure I had this straight.

“Jax?” Sam’s voice cut through my fog, momentarily pulling me from the conversation. “You seem…you aren’t…” An explosion of gray burst into the air.

“Biting it?” Her face paled, and I regretted the joke. “Sorry to disappoint, Sammy. You’re stuck with me for a little while longer.”

She laced her fingers through mine and squeezed once. To comfort me, or herself, I didn’t know. I didn’t care. If what Azi was saying was true, then none of it mattered. I stole a glimpse of the stone, then refocused on the demon.

You were saying?

I am not human, it said. I do not feel things the way you do. But what I do feel for her is immeasurable. My overwhelming desire is to see her happy.

That’s love, I replied, trying to ignore the insane prickles of jealousy. Because, really? What the f*ck?

Perhaps. I have felt human love before, through the lives of my previous hosts. It has never been like this.

Sammy and I aren’t like other people.

You are not, it agreed. And maybe that is why I allowed you to live. It bristled and then let out a contented sigh. You are an enigma among humankind, Jax Flynn. And you have my word. As soon as the stone is in your hand, I will depart.

What should I do with it? Zenak won’t have any reason to off me with you gone, but Sam is still a Pure. And what about the half it already has?

Give the stone to Samantha Merrick. She has the power to destroy it.

I’d bet my balls Sam had no clue how to go about that, but I gave an internal nod. And the other half?