Released (The Eternal Balance #3)(52)

Something inside me snapped, a force so primal, so incomprehensible in terms of simple human thought that I let go of a scream that rocked me to my core. The hairs on the back of my neck snapped to attention. The black smoke was back. It hovered all around me, the wispy tendrils extending in loving caresses. The vines that bound me were gone. A pair of eyes blinked out at me from the smoke, and then it vanished again.

Van wasn’t crying anymore. Chase wasn’t speaking. My gaze fell to Jax. He was on the floor, still. There was nothing except for a pain so profound, so all-encompassing, that it gnawed at every fiber of my being. There was no breath in my lungs, no ground beneath my feet. All that existed was the pain. The loss. It centered in my chest, and the weight of it crushed all that I was for what felt like an eternity before it spilled outward and leeched into every one of my limbs.

These things—these demons—had stolen everything from me. From my parents, to my freedom and identity. And Jax… They’d taken my lifeline, and there was nothing left. No chip with which to bargain.

Chase let out a roar and stooped to retrieve the knife. In a blurring move, it was in his hand and he was flying at me—weapon in one hand, stone in the other. There was no time to move.

Except, there was…

In the mere seconds it would have taken for him to cross to me, the blade should be buried deep beneath my skin.

It wasn’t.

The smoke had formed again, taking the vague shape of a man, and wrapped itself around Chase like chains. I grabbed the stone from Chase—it was easier than stealing from a blind man—and wrapped my other hand around his neck.

His skin sizzled, and he fought against my grip, but with Azi essentially holding him in place, Chase was trapped. His agonized screams and pleas for mercy were the most wonderful music to my ears. I only wished they could have lasted longer.

I felt the moment it all let go. I was able to take a deep breath as some of the red haze cleared. Heat surrounded me, a force so much bigger than myself, yet smaller, simpler, than the air that flowed through my lungs. An explosion sent me rocketing back, into the cave wall and to the ground. Hard. When it all cleared, Chase was lying on the other side of the cave, opposite where Jax lay and just as still.

There was a haze around me. I lifted my hand and turned it over several times in awe. A miasma, every color of the rainbow pulsating to the beat of my heart, surrounded me. I stared, transfixed for a moment as it detached from my skin and lifted away. It lingered above for several seconds before slowly dissolving into the air.

“Sam?” Van’s voice cut through my haze. “Sam, are you all right?”

I turned to see her approaching slowly, freed from the vines.

All right…?

No. Jax.

Sore, and convinced I had more than a couple cracked ribs, I dragged myself through the dirt to where Jax lay. A finger at his neck, at his wrist, my ear laid to his still-warm chest… There was nothing. No vibrant thump. I lost it then, as the pain I’d felt moments ago came back to consume me with a vengeance.

“Sam,” Van tried again. I was vaguely aware that she’d come up beside me and knelt in the dirt. “You did it. You kept your promise to me, and you got rid of Azirak.”

That got my attention. I lifted my head from Jax’s chest, my vision blurry and throat thick. The demon appeared to be gone again, probably for good this time. After all, how long could it maintain a presence without its host? But it’d been here to help with Chase. That made twice today that it’d saved me. Twice it’d intervened in order to make sure I was… Jax was gone, and I realized it wasn’t the demon I blamed, but me. “I got rid of nothing,” I snapped. “The demon left on its own—because of me—and that left Jax vulnerable. That got him killed.”

“You kept your word to me. The stone is gone. Destroyed. But… I wanna make sure I keep my word to you. I told you I would help you get Jax back, but…”

She stood, hefted me off the ground, and nudged me back a few feet. Looking at her closer now, I saw the difference. There was more color in her face. More vibrancy in her eyes. A light that hadn’t been there before emanated from every pore. When I’d destroyed the stone—however the hell I’d managed it—it must have released her magic.

Released her magic…

Hope swelled inside my chest, and I took another step back as she held her hand in the air above Jax’s body. Was this how he felt that night when I’d stabbed myself? Pushed to the edge of madness and craving any small bit of hope he could grab?

“I could bring him back, Sam. I could—”

“Do it.” It came out much harsher than I’d intended. She was, after all, offering to save his life. But something in her tone screamed of hesitation. She could do it, but she didn’t want to.

“It’s so much more complicated than a single spell.” She closed her eyes for a moment. When she opened them, she made a fist and held it up. “I believe I could do it, that my specialty lies in life magic, like my mother’s, but Jax isn’t a plant. He’s not a tree or an animal. He’s a human. And humans have souls.”

“So?”

“A soul is not something that magic can restore. I can bring him back, yes. Restore his body and his mind. But without a soul to fuse it together, he wouldn’t last an hour.”

The small bit of hope that had flourished only moments ago exploded and took the last bits of my heart with it. An hour? Fine. I’d take it. I’d find a way to make it stick. Make a deal with the devil himself if that’s what it took. “I don’t care. Do it. Do it anyway.”