Rebel Hard (Hard Play #2)(44)

Nayna slumped into the sofa, ísa beside her. “I need to get away.” She hadn’t understood that until she’d been sitting in her office, figuring out how she could avoid going home. “You know what I’ve realized? Raj is obstinate as hell in a quiet way. He’s decided on me and he’s not budging.” It felt so beautiful to be wanted that openly; if only that could fix everything.

“And you’re not sure yet?” ísa asked.

“I want to strip him naked and jump his bones like a sex maniac,” Nayna admitted because this was ísa, from whom she had no secrets. “Plus it turns out I like his brains.” She took a big gulp of the tea. “But there’s all this other stuff in my head that’s making it hard to think.”

Unable to sit still, she slammed the cup on the table and rose, started to walk back and forth. Her breathing came out short and sharp, her blood roaring in her ears. “Last night I got home to find my sister sitting at the kitchen table again, chatting away to my father. I love her, but at that instant I wanted to scream at her for ruining my life.”

Her body trembled. “And that was when I realized she hadn’t done anything to me.” It had been a ringing slap that stunned.

Nayna had walked quietly through to her room and just sat on her bed for ten long minutes, staring at the wall and seeing her own blindness. “This is my life, and I’m the one who’s screwed it up.” It had been a powerful insight, one that had made her face up to her own mistakes, her own lack of courage.

For better or worse, Madhuri had made her choices.

Fourteen-year-old Nayna’d had good reason to resent her sister. She’d lost her freedom to be a teenager because of Madhuri, had never had the chance to make teenage memories of the kind Madhuri had taken for granted.

But Nayna was an adult now, and she was still blaming her sister for her own life.

That was bullshit.

Slumping back into the sofa, she folded her arms. “I’m taking some extra vacation time, getting the hell out of here so I can clear my head. I’ve already okayed it with my bosses.” With the hours she’d put in pre-Christmas and over the past couple of days, her work was more than up to date and she’d be available to them by phone should they need her; she also had more than enough vacation time banked.

“Where are you going?” ísa asked, protective as a mama bear.

“Here.” Nayna used her phone to forward the booking to ísa; she did want someone to know her whereabouts should she go missing or get eaten by a possum.

ísa made sure the details had downloaded before she said, “If Raj tracks me down and asks?”

Nayna had zero self-control where Raj was concerned; he looked at her and she melted. “You know nothing.”

“Got it.”

After drinking some more of the tea, Nayna raised an eyebrow. “So, you’re going camping?” Her friend had messaged her about the family camping trip to which Raj’s friend Sailor Bishop had invited her.

“I hate you.” ísa’s glare was pure death. “I’m doing it for love.”

Snort-laughing and deliriously glad for the distraction, Nayna said, “Don’t forget the toilet paper.”

They talked more, of fears and hopes and pain. Nayna’s heart ached for what ísa was struggling with when it came to Sailor. He sounded like a really good guy—but one who had dreams that threatened to break ísa’s heart. Nayna’s parents might be too involved, but ísa’s were the other extreme. Except for a beautiful and happy few years with her own aji, Nayna’s best friend had grown up alone but for a few nannies.

Rain came down in a hard burst beyond the windows, blurring the night.

“Fuck the tea,” Nayna muttered on a burst of aggravation. “Where’s the tequila? I’ll sleep over.” She’d bought a small roll-on case at the mall, then filled it with necessary toiletries, a pair of pj’s, and a couple of changes of clothes. She had a spare set of canvas trainers in back of her car for when she wanted to run errands after work and didn’t want to wear heels. Anything she’d forgotten, she’d borrow off ísa.

She had no plans to go home again until she’d figured out her messed-up head. She sent through a quick message to her mother to say she’d be spending the night at ísa’s.

“Tequila as ordered.” ísa held up a bottle triumphantly.

Nayna found the salt.

The first shot burned like fire.

The second not so much.

By the third, they were giggling and ísa was muttering about romantic cactuses.

“It’s cacti,” Nayna said with a burp. “I think.”

“Cac…tiiiii,” ísa sounded out slowly. “Dating a gardener is uh-mazing! He gives me cactuses. Be careful,” she said solemnly. “They prick if you’re naked.”

Nayna wasn’t sure if it was after the fourth or the fifth shot, but at some point she dialed Raj’s number.

“Hi,” she said when he answered. “I want to lick your abs.”

“I could be persuaded,” he said and she thought he might be smiling. “Especially since I’ve just showered off the day so I’m clean for your tongue.”

“I don’t mind sweaty.” She crunched a potato chip, then dug her hand into the bag for another one. “How come you’re so cute?”