Preston's Honor(73)

We stepped outside into the warm spring day and went around the house to the other side of the fence, taking the familiar route to the creek. We walked past the mailboxes at the end of the road where the two alternate routes started, and I took Lia’s hand pulling her toward the one I’d taken on that day Cole and I had raced for her long ago. It somehow seemed apropos.

But Lia pulled back gently on my hand and nodded her head toward the trees in the middle. “Let’s take the shortcut.”

I frowned as we both stopped walking. “Shortcut? It’s all forest in there—it’ll take longer to make our way through it.”

She shook her head. “No, there’s a clear path once you get beyond the first couple of trees. I think it was a logging trail at some point. It’s a straight shot so it takes half the time.”

It felt as if my blood slowed in my veins, my feet glued to the spot where I stood.

Oh my God.

“Do you know if Cole knew about that path?” I asked so quietly I wondered if Lia could even hear me. A buzzing had taken up in my brain.

She tilted her head, looking at me with confusion in her eyes. “Yeah. I showed it to him once—I think you were at the orthodontist with your mom and I’d come by and—”

Oh, fuck me.

A loud burst of laughter escaped my throat, causing Lia to startle as I stumbled backward, letting go of her hand and clutching my stomach as wild laughter, tinged with a helpless anger rose up inside me so suddenly my body reacted physically. “You bastard,” I said softly, incredulously. I stood there for a moment, catching my breath, shaking my head. “You cheating bastard!” I yelled it this time, picking up a rock and hurling it at the sky.

“What are you doing?” Lia yelled, jumping back as if I was losing my mind. I raked both hands through my hair, letting the last few bursts of laughter, or anger or whatever it, was fade away. “Are you crazy?”

“No,” I sighed. “No. Just stupid. Fucking stupid.”

“What are you talking about, Preston? God, I’m lost here.”

“Me too, Lia. God, I’ve been lost for so fucking long.” And I missed my brother, even though if he’d been in front of me right that minute, I’d have beaten his ass. He’d tricked me! He’d fucking cheated. And for so long, I’d killed myself trying to honor an oath that had been based on a lie. And then I’d felt guilty after I’d followed my heart anyway.

It was partially my fault, though. I’d taken his bet. I hadn’t told him how I felt—chosen instead to leave it to what I thought was a small part chance and a bigger part my own willingness to run my heart out for her. If I’d just been honest with him . . . if he’d known how deeply I felt for Lia . . .

I sighed, the anger draining out of me. “We raced for you.”

Her brows came together, and she shook her head. “You . . . what? I don’t understand.”

I laced my fingers behind my neck and tilted my head back, looking up at the clear blue sky, wondering if Cole could see us now and if he was laughing in that way he always had when he was a kid and he’d gotten caught doing something naughty and self-serving. That laugh, part-charm and part self-deprecation, that had a way of melting even the hardest of hearts. I should have let you know, you cheating bastard. I wish I had. God, I wish I had. I released my hands and lowered my head, looking at Lia.

“We both wanted you, Lia. To decide who would ask you out, we raced for you. I didn’t know about the shortcut. Cole did. I ran with everything I had because I wanted you so badly to be mine. I didn’t understand how he won, but now I do.” I nodded my head to the trees where the shortcut I hadn’t even known about was hidden inside. The shortcut that, ironically, Lia had shown Cole.

Her face paled slightly as she stared at me. “You . . . you raced for me. To decide who would ask me out?” She spoke very slowly as if she was trying to understand something extremely complex. Or maybe just so utterly ridiculous that she was having trouble believing we’d actually done it. The latter I imagined, wincing.

“Yeah.”

Two bright red spots appeared on her cheeks, replacing the pallor in her skin that had been there moments before and understanding widened her eyes. “That’s why Cole kissed me that day at the fence. That’s why you walked away. Because he’d won the race.” She gritted out the words, her jaw barely moving.

“I . . . yeah.” I winced again. I’d watched them from the hall window on the second floor, misery and jealousy lashing at me from the inside. I’d hoped so damn hard that she’d reject him, turn him away, but she hadn’t, and it had hurt so much I’d hardly been able to breathe through it. But I’d done that. Me.

I’d done it to myself. And I’d done it to her.

For a frozen second we just stared at each other, before she spun on her heel and started walking away from me, her fists clenched at her sides.

I sighed, watching her leave, wondering if I should have told her the truth. But a lie had started that whole mess. And I wanted her to understand what had happened all those years ago, why I hadn’t pursued her. Why it hadn’t been me.

I stepped forward, intending to run after her, when she whirled around and began stalking back to me. I froze, surprised and confused.

She didn’t slow down as she approached and my eyes widened as I saw the fiery anger in hers. Her lips were pressed together, and I’d never once seen that particular expression on her face.