Love's Suicide (Love's Suicide #1)(24)

I wanted to laugh. That motto had been thrown out the door months ago. “Yeah, I don’t really care about that anymore. In fact, I don’t really care about anything anymore.”

I put my head down between my knees and tried to calm down.

“You look like shit.”

“Thanks. I appreciate that.”

“No, I mean I’ve never seen you look so upset. Is it because of me? I didn’t mean to be so harsh with you. I just couldn’t let things happen between us. You understand, right?”

I shrugged, even though I did understand. “Yeah, I know.”

“Branch will make you happy.”

I kept looking down. “You don’t know that.”

“Yeah, I do. It’s his life’s mission to love you more than I do. So I figure that as long as I still love you, he’ll worship the ground you walk on.”

I looked up at Brooks and tried to stay serious, even though in the midst of the horrible mess I was in I wanted to smile. “You just admitted that you still loved me.”

He reached for my hand and I let him take it. When our eyes met, I felt warmth running throughout my body as if we’d walked inside. “I will never stop loving you, Kat. For as long as I am breathing I will love you with everything I have in me, not because I hope to someday have you, but because nothing could ever make me stop, even you marrying my brother.”

“You know, you have everyone fooled. They all think you’re the son that they could never count on. It turns out that you’re the most beautiful soul they’ve ever known.”

We sat there looking at each other for couple seconds, not saying anything.

Brooks smiled and looked down at the ground before responding. “Don’t go calling me a saint just yet. I’ve been reconsidering that kiss since I let you walk away earlier.”

It was wrong; so wrong that I would be the scum of the earth for even considering it, and there I was, imagining those soft lips touching mine. It wasn’t just his lips that I wanted touching me either. I wanted all that Brooks could offer me, because once I knew he was the one who’d snuck into my room, I couldn’t stop wanting to experience it again. I wanted to know he was the one touching me and making me feel things that I’d never been able to feel before. The intensity wasn’t because I’d been emotional. It was because it wasn’t Branch.

“Please don’t hate me for saying this. I’m probably already going to Hell anyway.” I looked down before getting the courage to continue. “The thing is, I’m not married to your brother, not yet at least. If I had one wish in the world, besides seeing my parents one more time, I know what it would be.”

He smiled, because he already knew what it was. “We can’t, Kat.”

He was right. I was losing my mind even considering it. “We shouldn’t.” I felt myself leaning into him, so slowly that it was hard to notice.

“It’s wrong on so many levels.” I could have sworn that he was coming towards me as well.

“We should probably call it a night then.”

Our faces were almost touching and I could feel his hot breath touching me. “Yeah, we should.” His lips brushed over mine and I couldn’t help but close my eyes. He smelled liked musky heaven and I wanted so much more than he was giving me.

“It’s just one kiss, Brooks,” I whispered against his mouth.

We opened our eyes at the same time, and I’m not really sure whose tongue came out first. They were barely touching, and the electrical surge between us was just as powerful as it had ever been. Then it turned into something that neither of us could control. One kiss was never going to be enough, and I was done trying to fight my feelings for him.

For the first time in my life nothing mattered to me. I didn’t care about the people downstairs or the fact that we were out in public for the whole world to see. The only thing that was going through my mind was being with Brooks and feeling all of the love that he had for me pouring through the both of us.

His ravenous kisses set me on fire as the blaze igniting from our lips was traveling down between my legs. We were no longer leaning in to kiss each other. He’d grabbed me and sat me on his lap. I wrapped my exposed legs around him and felt the heat building between us. His lips were on my neck, while I gave his hand free reign to touch whatever he wanted.

I closed my eyes and pictured it going further before it was even happening. Our lips met again and I ran my hands underneath of his shirt. His hot chest was smooth and a small patch of hair was at the top. I tugged on it the next time he kissed me and he growled something under his breath as he pulled away.

We kissed again. “We should stop.”

I lifted his shirt over his head. “Five more minutes.” We kissed again, mingling our tongues together.

My dress was pulled up to my ribs and he started rubbing the base of my panties. My * was throbbing to be touched. He slid them over and ran the back of his hand over my smooth lips. I’d gotten a wax just a day before in preparation for my wedding night.

I put that thought in the back of my mind and buried it.

This moment was for Brooks. Nothing was going to stop us.

He looked down and watched himself touching me. I caught my breath seeing him watching his fingers sliding inside of my hot sex. His thumb worked magic on my clitoris and our mouths met again, allowing our harmonizing tongues another opportunity to play.