Just for Now (Sea Breeze #4)(63)

Jimmy had looked up at me when Trisha handed him the solid black Igloo lunch box, and smiled. “She packed me lunch,” he’d said in an awed voice. If I hadn’t been worried about Rock knocking me on my ass, I’d have grabbed her face and kissed her. She had no idea how much her thoughtfulness meant to them.

I’d gotten them safely on the school bus and was now wide awake. My days of sleeping in were over. By the time I got to my ten o’clock class, I’d be wired on caffeine.

I’d poured my first cup of coffee when a knock sounded at the door. Who the hell was it now? I set my cup down and walked over to open the door. Trisha stood outside, with Rock behind her. She looked anxious.

“Hey, y’all. Did you forget something?” I asked, stepping back to let them in.

Trisha came in, followed by Rock, who closed the door behind him.

“No. We want to talk to you about something,” Trisha said, glancing up at Rock.

“Okay, uh, y’all want some coffee?” I asked.

“No, thank you. Can we sit down?” Trisha asked.

Typically, I’d be less patient this early in the morning, but after all they’d done for me over the past few days, I’d open a vein and give them a pint of blood if that was what they wanted.

“Sure. Have a seat.” I waved them over to the couch.

I sat in the chair across from them and took a drink of my coffee while I waited on them to say whatever it was they had come here to say.

Trisha took a deep breath. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed that we haven’t been around as much lately. Like at Live Bay, we aren’t there as often and we haven’t been leaving the house much.”

I had been too wrapped up in my world with Amanda to notice anyone else. I just nodded instead of explaining how unaware I’d been.

“Well, Rock and I’ve been trying for over six months to get pregnant. Last month we went to a specialist, and I was told there was a one percent chance that I’d ever conceive. He said we could try different procedures they had, but it would cost thousands of dollars up front.” She paused and looked back at Rock again. He’d wrapped his arm around her shoulders and tucked her up against his side.

I didn’t know if she wanted me to comment on this, or how in the hell this had anything to do with me. So I waited for more.

“We checked into adoption, but it also costs thousands of dollars to adopt a baby, and you are put on waiting lists. It isn’t easy, and we don’t have thousands of dollars. We’d have to get a loan, and we might not be approved for a loan even then. It would be unsecured. Anyway, we started talking about adopting an older child. One in the state system who needs a home. I want a little girl.” She teared up as she said the words “little girl.”

“My momma was a lot like yours. She didn’t want to have much to do with me. Then she ran off with one of her boyfriends when I was eight, and I never saw her again. I remember lying in bed at night and pretending that there was a momma out there who wanted me. She was going to come get me one day, and she would love me.” Trisha stopped and reached up to wipe a tear that was rolling down her cheek.

“I saw Daisy, and I wanted her immediately. She was just what I wanted. A little girl I could love and raise as my own. I knew you’d never split the kids up. I understood that. So this weekend I offered to stay with them because I wanted to spend time with them.”

She took a deep breath and blinked back the tears filling her eyes again.

“I want them all. Jimmy and his sweet, caring nature—he reminds me so much of you. And Brent is so funny and charming when he opens up. They don’t expect anything, and that breaks my heart. I want to give them everything. I want to love them and reassure them that they have a home. I begged Rock to come with me Saturday night to stay with them. I wanted him to get to know them. He fell in love.” She sniffed and smiled up at him.

“Daisy wrapped him around her little finger in minutes, and he agrees that Jimmy is you made over, so of course he loved him. Then Brent just gets to you. You can’t help it. I know you just lost your mother and things are unsettled for y’all. I don’t want to come into your life and disrupt everything. I just want to know if there is any chance that you would consider letting Rock and me have the kids. We have the room. You’ve seen the new house we’re renting. I’d make them lunches and go on field trips. We’d bake cookies and go cut down our own Christmas tree every year. They’d never be left alone. I’d love them. We both would.”

When I lifted my eyes from Trisha’s hopeful, tear-streaked face to see the unshed tears in Rock’s eyes, I knew my answer. They wanted to give them what I wouldn’t be able to. I’d be the big brother who wouldn’t remember to pack their lunches. I’d be gone to school and games and work all the time. They’d know I loved them, but they’d be fending for themselves a lot of the time.

With Rock and Trisha, they’d have parents. The kind of parents I never got to have. The ones who gave them a happy, secure life. This wasn’t an opportunity most kids in their situation were given. There was even a real good chance the judge wouldn’t give the kids to me. He’d take them away and split them up into foster care.

“They’d be the luckiest kids I know to have you two as parents,” I replied.

Trisha let out a sob and covered her mouth with her hand.