Instead of You(85)

“McKenzie, I love you. I always have. I always will. What kept us apart before, it’s gone. Done. There is nothing in this world that is going to stop me from being with you. All you have to do is say yes.”

I had no words. He’d said exactly what I’d been praying to hear for three years and nothing in that moment could have stopped my mouth from pressing against his.

The kiss started out reverent and grateful. I was worshiping his mouth, thankful he’d found a way back to me. But it slowly morphed back into the frantic kissing where hands roamed everywhere and I simply needed to have him inside of me.

I reached down between us and took him in my hand, my forehead resting on his shoulder. He was just as beautiful as I remembered. I circled my hand around him, moving up and down his shaft, loving the way his breath hissed out and shuddered back in.

“Babe,” he rasped, his voice simply shattered. “Condom, top drawer,” he said, nodding toward his nightstand.

I pulled it open and blindly rummaged through it until I felt the foil wrappers, then immediately brought one to my mouth, carefully ripping it open. I leaned back and then slowly rolled it down his shaft. With a loud breath he brought a hand between us, positioning himself as I leaned up on my knees. My hand met with his and together we guided him to me. I slowly lowered myself down, trying to concentrate on the way it felt to be full from him, to have him inside me after so long. His hands slipped around my waist, then ran up my back to my shoulders, curling around the tops, and pulling me down so very gently, until he was fully seated inside of me.

My head fell softly against his, our foreheads meeting, and we sat there, breathing each other in. I had never been so full, in every sense of the word.

“Jesus, Kenz,” he whispered, his hands grasping at my shoulders, holding me down.

“Hayes, I need to move,” I whimpered.

“Just give me a second. If you move right now, well, this will all be over before it really starts.”

I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my mouth to his. As the kiss built, so did my need, and my hips moved to give me any kind of relief I could find. I rocked back and forth slowly on him, trying to give him the time he needed, but also trying to simply put out the fire that was quickly burning through me.

One of his hands moved from my shoulder down to my ass, holding me even closer, which only added more friction to my clit.

“Oh, my God,” I cried, my mouth still pressed against his, but neither one of us were kissing anymore. I was clinging to him, grasping at his skin as my hips ground against him. The feeling of his cock inside me and the electricity of my clit rubbing against him in just the right way, were sending me into a stratosphere I’d never been to before. “Hayes,” I whimpered, “I’m gonna come.” I sounded afraid, and I partly was. Afraid of the enormity of what I was feeling. I was dangling on the precipice of the most powerful orgasm I’d ever had and the panic of feeling too much was definitely overwhelming, but not strong enough to stop me.

“I’ve got you,” he said, still using his hand to make sure I was feeling everything I could.

“Hayes,” I moaned. His hand tightened on my shoulder. Then, my entire body lit up. My core clenched around him as waves of pleasure rocketed through me. I grasped at him, trying to hold on as my entire body gave out on me. His hands wrapped around me and held me close to him, and I simply tried to breathe through my release.

After a few long moments of settling, of breathing and trembling, I finally came back around, and that’s when Hayes picked me up and twisted, laying me on my back again.

“That was f*cking amazing,” he said, smiling down at me. I smiled back, lazily, but then gasped as he pulled out of me just slightly, then pushed back in. He smiled even wider, thrust just a little bit harder, and everything after that became one blurry and continuous form of sensual torture.

It was as if my body were so aware it was him, so thankful Hayes was the one inside me, it refused to come back down from the plateau. Everything felt magnificent. Every nuance was accentuated. A kiss on my neck wasn’t just a kiss; it was a match on the wick of a firework. The caress of his hand against my skin damp with sweat was a boat crashing through the waves of a storm at sea. Every single thing about being with Hayes was magnified and exponentially better.

He took his time with me, almost as if he were trying to make up for all the time we’d lost, but I wasn’t complaining. Nearly every fantasy I’d had about Hayes was fulfilled. He used me in a way that made me feel delicate, and he tossed me around, taking whatever he wanted in that moment. He made love to me, he f*cked me, and everything in between.

In the end though, when he finally found his release, he was back on top of me, his lips to mine, and his hand cradling my face.

“This is us. Forever,” he whispered as he shivered, the cold air in the room making our damp skin pebble. “It’ll never be long enough, but I’ll give you everything I can.”

“I don’t need anything but you.”





Epilogue


Hayes


It’d been a little over one year since McKenzie had allowed me back into her life, even though I didn’t deserve her. I’d gone back to Bellingham with every intention of trying to win her back, but also with the expectation that she’d turn me away—with good reason. So, when she took me back in the most gracious way, without one single instance of holding my past against me or using our time apart as a weapon, I never took it for granted.