Image (Insight #3)(62)

My eyes widened slightly. She had a point; it didn’t make sense that Jayda wouldn’t share that with me.

“I think there are two of you; that’s the only way it would make sense,” Felicity said.

“Then where is she?” I said under my breath.

“Ask him to tell you more. Maybe we’ll be able to sort through his memories and find her,” Clarissa said.

“I don’t know how I feel about validating his memories. They’re the rock he stands on, the reason he thinks Landen has me living in a ‘web of lies,’ as he puts it.”

“Yes, but the more he tells you, the more information you’ll have to help us all find this girl,” Clarissa said, enforcing her point.

“He doesn’t even know that I know he was Oba,” I said with a smile. “Landen said he was waiting to be scorned when I told them that Jayda and Alyianna showed him my past lives.”

“That’s good; catch him off guard. I’d be interested to know why he just didn’t tell you,” Felicity said.

I leaned back and played out the argument in my head. I was anxious to hear why he just didn’t tell me who he was then, why he’d watch me struggle with the idea of me killing him. Anger swarmed deep inside of me as I assumed that he let me suffer in order to give himself the validation that I did love him.

“I’m going to be honest with you, Willow,” Felicity said. I looked at her like she was crazy; she had no choice but to be honest with me. She raised her eyebrows and continued, “Let me rephrase that,” she said, laughing at my expression. “I’m going to tell you what I think – and that is that you’re standing in the center of a love triangle that no woman would want to be in.” Her eyes found Landen. “Standing between Lust and Love, both of them are so perfect that it’s hard not to stare.”

I sighed and nodded. I’d never admitted aloud how attractive I found Drake; his presence alone was growing addictive.

“Stella told us how impactful Drake’s touch is on you,” Clarissa added.

“That’s just my body; Landen reaches my soul,” I said as my gaze caught his across the field.

“We’re just trying to put ourselves in your place so we can help you - and when we try to imagine ourselves there, we find ourselves weak,” Felicity said.

I looked to my side at her. “You’d never choose anyone above Brady,” I promised her.

“My soul wouldn’t, but we’re all made of flesh; I can’t tell you what I’d do if the ‘bad’ soulmate came to me and had a touch like Drake’s, eyes like Drake’s...I would never leave Brady, but I know my mind would at least play out the possibilities for me,” Felicity said.

Her honesty was making me uncomfortable; in my opinion, some things, some desires should just be left unsaid.

“I’m not giving much credit to the ‘bad’ soulmate idea; I believe that August would agree with me on that point,” I said, sitting forward.

I lied to them. I was starting to believe the idea; I just didn’t want them to have any cause to fear my weakness. I knew Landen would feel their doubt in me. Right now, his confidence was what I was hiding behind.

Clarissa leaned forward, and her eyes searched over my face. “I believe it; I’ve seen it,” she said.

“Where? How?” I asked, slightly amused by how sure she was.

“When I travel, it’s everywhere. On more than one occasion, the person I was leading found someone who was already in a committed relationship. It’s really common in Infant. I’m sure you’ve seen it more than you care to admit,” she answered.

I knew in the world in which I was raised that it was growing more and more uncommon for couples to join for a lifetime, that most of my friends had two sets of parents. I never saw that as a choice between passion and love; I saw it as one love dying and another being born...the children were just bystanders in the matter.

“I’d feel sorry for the one that was left behind when I escorted the new soulmates home, but I reasoned that the person left behind was now released from an illusion that the body gives; they weren’t free to find the one that completed them,” Clarissa said.

I sighed. “You know what would make me feel better?” I asked her. She raised her eyebrows, telling me to go on. “If you told me that you knew for sure that the person you left behind did find someone, that they weren’t living a life of heartache that was left to them,” I said, tilting my head.

I watched as Clarissa’s eyes moved across her memory.

“Now, I’m going to have to check and see,” she said, frustrated by her own words.

I smiled slightly. “Let me know if you find positive results,” I said under my breath.

“Well, I won’t know before we go to the palace, so you’re going to just have to trust what Aora said about your past life: you can’t sacrifice your heart for what you think is the greater good; you’ll all die,” Clarissa said as grief and doubt overcame her.

“What do you mean ‘we?’ You’re not going?” I said under my breath.

“Dane’s going; you said we weren’t to be apart, so I am going,” Clarissa said, standing and walking to Dane’s side.

My eyes found Dane. I knew it would break his heart if I told him I thought it was Olivia who was supposed to protect me. I’d rather just let him come, keep the peace.