Hidden Monsters (Volkov Bratva #4)(56)

“Is that what has you back in New York?” Alex asked looking back to her.

“Yes, Calvin O’Fare is having auditions next month with five open spots in his company. Maybe you can come out and audition, too?”

Her heart skipped a beat at those words, pounding even harder as she thought about it. She could still remember what it felt like, how dancing brought her so much joy in a time when she rarely felt it. This could be good for her, more than good.

“Here, why don’t you take my number and give it some thought. Between now and then, I can text you the address and dress code.”

Alex found herself nodding, plugging Amerie’s new number into her phone and giving hers in turn.

“Between the pair of us,” Amerie said with a smile as she turned to go. “Our spots are guaranteed.”





25

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Spontaneous Visits





It had only been a matter of time.

Considering how careful Luka was with most things, it came as a surprise to him that he’d finally stopped resisting the draw to her. He couldn’t even say when it had actually happened, but a part of him recognized that he was tired of fighting it. And it wasn’t Mishca who he feared so much—even though he knew the Bratva boss wouldn’t approve—but of what Luka could do to her.

No one truly knew what all he had done back in Albania, not even Klaus. And if that weren’t enough, he’d ultimately turned his back on everything he knew for people who wanted him dead. He often thought about the choice he had made all those years ago, the single phone call that had ultimately changed his life.

But he also thought about why it was he’d come to this place, to these people, instead of any number of other organizations who would have gladly wanted someone who had his skills.

Was it penance? Maybe then he’d wanted to die, and he would never take his own life, but if it was done at the hand of someone else, maybe then he’d finally let death catch up with him…

Many a night he had lain in bed, thinking about the decision that had taken him months to consider. And now that things were good for him and there wasn’t as much worry about anyone finding out about what he had done—especially now that Jetmir was dead—he should have been good. There was nothing more he could possibly need.

…Well, except Alex.

He knew his defenses were crumbling, even if he didn’t want to admit it to himself. But while he would hardly put up a fight against himself, even if he had done a good job of it for the last couple of years, he needed help from elsewhere.

With Mishca off doing business with Klaus somewhere, instead of heading home, Luka headed to the club, ignoring everyone he passed until he reached the office in the back, slipping through the open door and shutting it soundly behind him.

Lauren, who was seated behind Mishca’s desk, looked up in alarm, but a smile replaced it when she saw that it was him. Not since the first day he met her did she fear him, not even when she learned what exactly his job was with the Bratva. Whether a curse or a blessing, Luka wasn’t sure.

“I thought you would be off doing…well, whatever it is you do when you’re not here,” she said conversationally, resting a hand on her stomach, but as quickly as she did, she moved her hand to the desk.

Weird.

“Mishca didn’t tell you about this, any of it, not at first, right?” Luka asked, gesturing around them, not having to explain what he meant.

“Uh, he didn’t. Why—”

“Not to mention the whole deal with your father—sorry about that, by the way.”

Lauren, who had no idea what in the hell he was going on about, shook her head slowly. “Thanks?”

“He didn’t tell you about his past, none of the shit he had done before you met him, not about who he was, right?”

“Luka, what are you talking about?”

Collapsing down onto the sofa on the other side of the room, he threw his arm over his face, sighing heavily. He tried to think of an answer that encompassed everything he wanted to say, or at least enough that she could get a clear idea, but he didn’t even know how to talk to Alex so how in the hell was he going to talk to Lauren about it?

“Is this about Alex?” she asked as she crossed the room, sitting across from him with the brightest of smiles. “You’ve decided to stop fighting yourself on it.”

“That’s not the half of it,” he muttered more to himself than to her.

“I’m listening.”

Maybe after he told her, just some but not all, maybe she would warn him away from Alex and then he could get this stupid idea out of his head. She was the main one advocating for this relationship, and if she knew more about why they called on him in the waning hours of the day, maybe she wouldn’t be as happy about sending him to the sister of her husband.

“I killed Vlad.”

She blinked once, twice, but otherwise didn’t react to what he’d said. “That’s why Mish was angry with you for a while.”

“He wasn’t the first, won’t be the last. It’s…It’s what I’m good at. And if you catch me on a bad day, I live for it. Some days I can’t see anything else. What can I give her that she doesn’t already have?”

“Is this the part where I tell you that you’re just misunderstood?” she asked carefully, actually taking what he was saying seriously. “Because I’m not going to do that. I’m sure it’s not any worse that Mishca…or Klaus.”