Blindness(79)

“Oh my god, Cody!” I say, sitting up and gathering his quilt around me.

Cody is on his feet in a flash, searching the floor for his jeans. He finally finds an old pair of board shorts and slides them on, hopping from his bedroom to the front door. He comes back seconds later with Jessie trailing behind him, her hand covering her eyes, but cracking between the fingers so she can look right at us.

“Cover your bits, I don’t want to see any of this shit,” she says, popping her gum loudly.

“Fuck, Jess, what are you doing here?” Cody says, sitting at the edge of the bed, and rubbing the sleepiness from his eyes.

“I’m saving this one’s ass, is what I’m doing,” she says, pointing to me. I snug the blanket to my body a little closer, realizing I’m completely naked underneath.

Jessie just rolls her eyes at me and then sits down on Cody’s floor, leaning her back against his door. “Trevor’s looking for you. And before you ask, yes, I covered for you,” she says. I breathe a huge sigh of relief.

“Thank you, Jessie. So much,” I say, feeling like I may now have minutes rather than the seconds I thought I had before to get my facts in order.

“Yeah, yeah,” she says, followed by another pop of her gum. “Here’s the deal. You spent the night at my house, because you had a bad reaction to your drink. I left right after you, told Trevor I was taking you home. He sent you a shitload of texts, so your phone was in my car all night, and that’s why you couldn’t text back. Got it?”

I nod yes and feel my throat start to close up from the onset of what I’m pretty sure is an anxiety attack.

“I’m going to go out there and watch some TV, but you and I probably need to show up at your front door in the next few minutes, before Trevor sees my car. Think you can handle that?” she says, getting back to her feet and slipping through the door to give us privacy.

Once the door is closed, I lie back down and try to stop the room from spinning and closing in on me. “Charlie, are you okay?” Cody says, sliding up beside me and sweeping my hair from my sweaty forehead.

“Yeah, I’m just…scared, I think,” I say, not using the right word, but the only one that comes to mind. Cody turns from me, and I know he’s blaming himself, so I move into him and grab his chin with my hand, pulling him to me. “Don’t think for a single minute that I have any regrets. I am so happy…right here, right now. I’m just worried about hurting Trevor.”

Cody’s eyes close, and I feel his lungs collapse with the air that escapes him. He rubs his hand over his face some more and turns to me again, running his fingertips down the length of my face, neck, shoulder, and body. “I love you, Charlie. No matter what, I just want you to know that,” he says the words almost like they’re a goodbye, and it crushes me.

“I love you too, and that’s the only thing that matters,” I say, trying to reassure him. I kiss him then and roll on top of him, my hair cascading around us, shielding us—like we have our own hiding place. Then Jessie’s pounding breaks us and pulls us back to reality.

“Tic-toc, Charlie,” she says.

“I’m getting dressed,” I yell back.

“I’m gonna jump in the shower. You head over with Jessie. I’ll just plan on seeing you later. Maybe at the shop?” he says.

I smile at the thought of us making plans, and I’m instantly missing him even though I haven’t left.

I dress while he’s in the shower, pulling on my damp clothing to go along with Jessie’s lie. When she sees me, she pulls her face into a frown, and I feel sick. She didn’t want me to hurt Cody, to pull him into this, and now I’ve gone and made things so complicated.

“I messed up, Jessie. I’m so sorry, but I won’t hurt him,” I say, hoping she’ll forgive me.

“What, that?” she says, pointing to Cody’s bedroom. “Hell, I’m all for that. I was just bummed, because I really liked your outfit. But that blouse is burn-worthy now, I’m afraid.”

Smiling, I reach for her hand and she pulls me in for a hug and then sniffs my shoulder. “Yeah, you smell like you’ve been sick all night in these things. Good move,” she winks. “Okay, well, let’s get you back where you belong…until you don’t?”

I know what she means by her question, and I reassure her with my nod. “Right, that’s happening really soon,” I say.

We skip across the driveway, and to the backdoor, a more natural place for me to come in, and when I do, I see Jim sitting in the kitchen with a cup of coffee. He smiles when I enter, but goes right back to reading some magazine he has spread open. It looks like Sports Illustrated.

“You sure you feel okay now?” Jessie says, playing it up for Jim’s benefit.

“Yeah, I think I’ll just eat a little something. Thanks for bringing me home,” I say, smiling at the side of my mouth when I see her back out the door. I barely make eye contact with Jim as I pass through the kitchen, hoping I can just slip upstairs and shower before I run into Trevor.

“Morning, Jim,” I say, trying to keep a natural feeling in the air.

“Yes, good morning,” he says, still not looking up from his magazine. I wait a second to see if he has more to say, but then continue to the door, until he pauses me again.