Beauty in Autumn (Beauty #3)(12)

Ruari gives another beastlike snarl of rage, and then I hear him storm out of my room, claws clicking on the stone floor.





5





WILLOW


The next day passes much like the last, but I'm conscious now, more than ever, that time is slipping away. The autumn weather - brisk and crisp with the high wind - has turned bitterly cold. I open my window and wrap myself in a blanket to stay near it, but it's not comfortable. The day passes endlessly slow, and I can't help but think about every hour that slips away. Every minute.

Ruari does not come by.

It isn't until I climb into my bed again and adjust my double-blindfolds that I wonder if he's coming to see me at all. Has he given up on me?

Did he think that when I asked him to leave, I meant forever?

Did he think I'd given up entirely?

He'd ruined the moment, but I've not given up on him. I still want to break this curse. I still want him.

I rack my brain, trying to think of any hidden messages in Leta's instructions. Is there something I missed? But her instructions were simple, and if I follow them, at the end of the three days, the curse will be broken.

Don't look upon anything that's part of his curse.

Don't tell him why.

Don't let him spill his seed inside me.

The last part still makes me blush, of course. Not that we'll ever get to him making love to me. This isn't going as I'd hoped, especially not if he continues to leave me alone over and over again. He's offended by my blindfold, but I can't remove it. And because I'm blindfolded, I can't go after him.

What to do?

"Ruari?" I call out. There's no answer, not even when I touch myself and call his name a few more times. He's not here. Frustrated, I slip on my night-dress and fumble for a pair of shoes.

If he's abandons me, I worry it'll affect the curse. I worry we need to spend this night together. Somehow I don't think Leta pictured us spending so much time apart when she advised me, but what can I do? I'm only one person and dozens - maybe hundreds - have failed before me. Maybe this is doomed after all.

But if it is, then why not enjoy one last night in the world? Why spend it alone and lonely? Unloved?

That decides me. If Leta's wrong - or if I fail - then I might as well go out in the arms of another, experiencing all that I can of love before fate catches up with me. I slide off the edge of the bed and put my hands out, feeling for the wall. I encounter it, and continue to feel my way along until I find the door. I open it and step through, keeping the thick stone against one hand as I do. I find a few more doors as I go, but as I open each one and call out Ruari's name, there's no response. I continue on, determined to find him.

I...hope it's a small castle.

As I continue down the hall, I lose my footing. I step forward and the floor just isn't there. Too late, I realize I've found stairs and pitch forward--

Only to be caught by a pair of strong arms. I give a little cry of surprise and cling to Ruari's shoulders. "You caught me!"

"What are you doing, wandering around blind?" His voice is a furious growl, and the hands that hold me are tight. He gives me a little shake as if he wants to rattle my head, but doesn't put me down. "I'm taking you back to your rooms."

"What? No!" I cling to his neck, as if that will solve everything. "I came looking for you!"

He snarls. "Why?"

"Because you didn't come to see me," I say softly. "If this is our last night together, why are we going to spend it apart?"

Ruari hesitates. "You told me to leave you alone."

"I was frightened last night. You broke my trust and I couldn't expect you to not pull off my blindfold. It's very important to me that it stays on until the morning." I press my nose against his throat. He smells warm and slightly sweaty, but human. I love the smell of him, I decide. Sometimes I think the 'beast' thing is all in his head, but if it wasn't for touching him, I'd think he was a beast. He sounds like one when he walks, and when he talks. It's all very confusing.

"Until the morning," he repeats slowly. "But in the morning..."

"I know," I say softly. I might be another one of the doomed roses in the morning. "But if this is to be my last night, I'd like to spend it with you. But...I can't if you try to remove my blindfold again. Can you promise me that you won't try to pull it off?"

"It means that much to you?"

I wish I could tell him how important it is. "It does. It has to stay on." I reach out with one hand to find his face, and cup his cheek. "But that doesn't mean that anything else has to stay on." I'm being so bold, but what have I got to lose at this point?

He groans and presses his face against my shoulder, hugging me against him. "I wish I could kiss you, Willow."

"You can't?" I reach up and try to touch his mouth, but he pushes my hand away.

"Don't." He grips my fingers in his. "It's the worst part of the curse. I...I don't want you to see me like that."

He means with my hands. Oh. I nod, understanding what it's like to feel uncomfortable and vulnerable to another. "I won't touch your face and you won't touch my mask. Is anything else off limits?"