Atone (Recovered Innocence #2)(71)

“Help her!” I scream into the phone. “Please. Somebody help her.”

“I need your location, sir.”

I drop the phone on the bed. So f*cking useless. I lie down next to Vera. Her eyes are barely open, but I know she sees me. I take her hand. The sirens get louder and louder until it sounds like they’re in the next room.

“I love you,” I tell her. “You’re going to be okay. He’s dead. He can’t ever hurt you again. I love you.” I keep repeating it over and over.

Her eyelids close, but there’s a faint smile around her lips. I know she hears me. She can’t f*cking die. She can’t.

There’s noise in the living room.

I start to get up to get her help.

“Freeze,” someone shouts. “Don’t move. Drop the weapon.”

I toss the gun away from me. “Please. You have to help her. She needs an ambulance.”

“Hands behind your head. Don’t move. Don’t f*cking move.”

I do as I’m told. I don’t want to leave Vera. Three of them pile on top of me and cuff me. They’re rough, but I take it. They haul me up by my arms.

“Please. Help her. Don’t let her die,” I tell them as they’re hauling me out. “Vera! I love you!”

Outside, the crowd is back. A woman, talking to an officer, points at me coming down the stairs. At the bottom we have to navigate around the guy I shot. All I can think about is Vera. I beg and beg for an ambulance for her, but none come. They can’t just let her die. I can’t lose her. I can’t lose her.

They shove me into the back of a car and take off. I don’t give a f*ck where they take me or what they do to me. All I care about is Vera.

They keep me cuffed and bring me into an interrogation room, dumping me in a chair. I lean back, resting my head on the wall, and close my eyes. All I can see is the small smile on Vera’s lips. I hold on to that image.

A detective comes in and introduces himself. I don’t tell him shit. I’ve been here before. I tell them I want my lawyer. When they ask for a name I give them Shayla Reese’s name. She’s the only one who can help me. She knows why we were in that apartment and who Javier is. She knows Vera’s story. I ask for updates on Vera, but no one’s telling me shit. They think I shot her. I can’t stop shaking. I killed people. I blew Javier’s f*cking brains out. I’m not sorry about it, but I’m not coping too well with it either. I shot three people, including an FBI agent. I’m going down this time.

I can’t be still. Banging my head on the wall, I try to get the image of Vera lying in a pool of blood out of my head. If she dies I don’t care what they do to me. They can toss me back in prison until I f*cking rot. I don’t care. I’m dead if she’s dead. No one’s telling me anything. They just stare at me. They know who I am. They know I escaped prison once. They don’t want me to escape again. I see the contempt in their eyes.

It’s hours or days—who can f*cking tell?—before the door finally opens and Shay walks in. I bolt up straight in my chair. She’s my link to the outside and to Vera. There’s a grim set to her mouth. Her gaze doesn’t quite meet mine.

“How’s Vera?”

She waits until the detective closes the door to speak. “She’s in surgery. That’s all I know right now. You, however, are in some very serious trouble until we can get this sorted out. What the hell happened in that apartment?”

I give her all the details I can remember. When I’m done, I ask the other question I’ve been anxious for the answer to.

“Are they all dead?”

“The marshal, Javier Abano, Agent Carter, and the guy you shot on the stairs are. The other guy they found in the bedroom with Vera is in grave condition. They don’t expect him to survive his head wound.”

I lower my head. “Fuck.” I’m not sorry Javier’s dead, but I don’t feel good about it. I killed three people today. I don’t know how to reconcile it. That’s not who I am. That’s not who I want to be. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

“You did what you had to do to save yourself and Vera.”

“But still…”

“I know.” She pats me on the shoulder. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“What the hell went wrong with Agent Carter?”

“I don’t know. Ed’s beside himself. He trusted Carter. The cops are still trying to sort it out with the Feds. Only Carter and the special agent in charge knew about your situation. With Carter dead, it’s up to the SAC to work it out for us. I’m doing my best to try to be in the loop, but no one’s talking to me. This is such a clusterf*ck for the marshals and the FBI. They each lost a man, and the FBI doesn’t want to admit that their agent was corrupt and compromised your situation. They’re trying to pin some of it on you. They won’t get to, though. I won’t let them. But you might be in here for a while, until it all gets sorted out.”

“I wish I could see her.” I’m having a hard time focusing on what Shay’s saying. I honestly don’t give a f*ck about me, except that as long as I’m in here I can’t be with Vera.

She squeezes my shoulder. “I know you do. Let’s talk to these detectives and work on getting you out of here so you can do that. Are you up for it?”