Atone (Recovered Innocence #2)(66)

“We don’t have those details. We’ll know more after the autopsy.”

“He’s coming for me.”

“He can’t get to you,” I tell her, looking to Agent Carter for confirmation.

“You’re safe with us,” he affirms. “We need to move you as soon as possible. The two agents you identified aren’t in the building and won’t be back until tomorrow morning. We need to keep them on as though nothing’s changed until we finish our investigation of them.” He turns to me. “You’re going with her, I take it.”

“Yes.”

“We’re leaving in twenty minutes. We’ll need your clothing sizes and a list of the minimal things you’ll need to get you by for a few weeks. You won’t get to say goodbye to anyone or contact them in any way. I’m going to need both of your cellphones.”

“I don’t have mine,” I say. “I gave it to my sister.”

Vera slides hers across the table.

“Will my client be able to contact me if she needs me?” Shay asks.

“We’ll arrange for it.”

“What do you want me to tell your sister?” Mr. Nash asks me.

“Tell her that I finally figured it out. She’ll know what that means.”





Chapter 34


Vera


I can’t get the image of Marie’s face out of my head. It overlaps with Cherry’s. Both of them died because of me. Two sets of sightless eyes staring at me, blaming me. I started this journey to save Marie and ended up being the reason she’s dead. There’s no place in my head I can go to escape that fact. Killing her and dumping her body on the FBI’s doorstep is a big giant f*ck-you to the Feds and a message to me that they can’t protect me. No one can. He’s coming for me. He knows where I am and he’ll take down anyone who stands between him and me.

I know him too well. This is personal. I was more than one of his favorites. I was, for a while, his mistress. I had it better than the other girls during that time. He didn’t rent me out. He kept me for his personal amusement. I had a big bedroom with its own bathroom, access to movies, a personal trainer, hairstylist, and pretty lingerie. He brought me gifts and f*cked me for hours, but never spent the night in my bed. He didn’t let the other men touch me. My piercings were his idea. They were his stamp on me, an outward sign of his total dominance.

That’s when I started spending time with him in his office while he worked. While I sat at his feet or rubbed his shoulders I quietly learned how he ran his business. He underestimated me and my ability to memorize anything and everything. I knew the combination to his safe, and the passwords to his computer, his bank account, and the thumb drive I stole. He had no idea. In my sick, twisted mind I made myself out to be his partner. I had dreams of us getting married and running the business together.

He had other ideas.

I don’t know what changed, but one day he stopped coming to my room. He stopped calling me to his office. Three days went by without me seeing him. On day four I was put back into rotation with the other girls. I never knew why.

I got to keep the room, but all of the other perks were gone. I cried for him, actually cried. He came to see me a week later and I pleaded with him to take me back. I thought I loved him. He made me think the pathetic attention he gave me was true affection. Or maybe I wanted to believe it was. He f*cked with my head so many times I lost track of everything, including myself.

He laughed while I begged. After that, the only time I saw him was when he called me to his office for punishment or to go out on a special assignment, like the one with the councilman. It wasn’t Cherry’s death that lit the fuse of my escape. It was doing that job with her and finding out she was pierced exactly the same way I was. I knew then that she was the one who replaced me. Her being put back into rotation meant that she had also been replaced. Until that time, I held out hope that he’d want me back someday. It wasn’t revenge that drove me to leave him and take the thumb drive, it was jealousy.

Stupid. I was so stupid to waste any emotion on that bastard. Even now I can’t bring myself to hate him. He’s already taken so much from me, he’s not going to get any more.

Beau and I were shuttled through an underground passage in the FBI building to another building about a half mile away. It felt like we walked forever, taking unmarked, seemingly random turns until we went up a set of stairs and came out into another office building. A car took us to an apartment building somewhere. I don’t know where, because we were blindfolded and made to wear headphones so that we couldn’t hear anything. The only thing that got me through it was Beau’s arm around me and the feel of his big, solid body next to mine.

I still can’t believe he asked me to marry him. Is this even happening? Everything that’s happened since being in FBI custody seems so surreal. I’m struggling to play catch-up. Just when I adapt to the latest turn of events and think I might finally have a grasp on things, something else happens and my world spins out of control. I feel a bit like a tennis ball being batted back and forth.

We’re in this apartment with a U.S. Marshal babysitter and another outside, and all I can think about is who is going to plan Marie’s funeral? Who’s going to attend it? Who’s going to choose the flowers and stand over her grave, mourning her? I’m her only family. When I agreed to talk to the FBI, I thought Marie would eventually be with me. I pictured us getting to know each other and being a family. I never imagined Javier would kill her. I should’ve. I should’ve seen that coming. Even if I did, could I have done anything about it?