A Shadow Bright and Burning (Kingdom on Fire #1)(53)

“My love has wealth and beauty,





The rich attend her door;





My love has wealth and beauty,





But I, alas! am poor.”





Why did those words make me cringe? I peered around the corner and found them, Rook seated and singing, Lambe with a violin beneath his small chin, Wolff at the cello. As they finished the song, Lilly applauded and rushed forward.

“Oh, I’ve never heard anything so beautiful. You’ve a heavenly voice,” she said, seating herself beside Rook.

“That’s kind, Lilly, but I’m not that good.” He laughed.

“Oh no. I think it’s the most wonderful—”

Pretending I’d not been eavesdropping, I entered the room. Rook rose at once. “Miss Howel,” he said.

He would never need to call Lilly miss. The thought made me ill. Lambe and Wolff stood and clapped Rook on the shoulder.

“You’ve a true voice,” Wolff said. “Thank you for accompanying us. We needed the practice.”

“It’s a pleasure,” Rook said. The boys nodded to me as they left.

“I sensed he required some cheering up,” Lambe whispered. In that moment I loved him, and hated myself.

“Can I help you with anything, miss?” Lilly asked.

“I was hoping to speak with Rook privately.”

“Of course.” She beamed at him. “Meet you in the stables later? Jimmy’s teaching the girls the waltz.”



“Yes.” Rook’s smile faded as soon as Lilly had gone. “How are you, Nettie?” He took a sudden interest in a broom and would not look at me. Well, why should he be pleased with my visit? Now that I thought about it, this was the first time in two weeks I’d bothered to see him alone.

“Lessons are going along. How are you?” I sat down on the bench and waved him to come beside me. He sat as far away as possible, and folded his arms together so as not to touch me even by accident. He acted as though I were diseased.

“I’m well,” he said, voice tight.

“Lilly told me you’ve had headaches, so I know that’s not true,” I muttered.

“It’s just headaches. Nothing I’ve not had before.” A moment passed in silence. I couldn’t understand our awkwardness. Perhaps I’d ignored him, but from the way Rook was behaving, one would think I’d been gone two years, not two weeks.

“She says she can hear your cries all the way in her bedroom. Are you making the paste?”

“I don’t take it anymore,” he said. “It interferes too much.”

“Are you mad? Don’t you want to control this?”

Rook grimaced. “I know how much it repulses you,” he said.

Perhaps I was losing what little I’d left of my mind. “You know it doesn’t repulse me. I just hate to see you this way.”

“I won’t give it up.” His bad hand tightened into a fist. “It’s all I have.”

“That’s not true. You mustn’t let it hold you down.” To my surprise, Rook stood and faced me, trembling.



“I don’t see it as holding me down. That’s the way you see it,” he said.

“Why on earth should I begin hating your scars after eight years? What’s changed so drastically?”

“What’s changed?” he cried. Then, his expression clearing, he sat beside me on the bench again. His quick shift in temperament scared me. “What’s changed?” he repeated softly. “You don’t know what we’re talking about, do you?”

“What are we talking about?” I leaned away from him.

“Wait,” he said. He placed his palms together and closed his eyes. Taking three deep, slow breaths, he raised his hands.

The shadows in the corner of the room moved.

At first I thought I was going mad, watching the inky blackness spread. The daylight that stretched across the kitchen floor seemed to shrivel and die as the shadow overtook it. The darkness was moving, growing. It congealed around Rook’s feet like an oily pool. He leaned down and traced his fingertips along the mass. It shifted and swirled in response, a living thing.

“What in God’s name are you doing?” I breathed.

The shadow dispersed, returning to the walls as if nothing had ever happened. Rook’s pupils were wide and dark. “I’ve shown you before. The night Korozoth attacked, I came to your room when they’d all gone.” I thought and thought…and recalled the dream where Rook floated above me, cloaked in darkness. Oh Lord. “Watch.”

He closed his eyes and held his breath. The light in the kitchen faded rapidly as shadows billowed out from the crevices and corners. The room around me swirled into blackness. With a startled cry, I created a ball of fire in my hand. Rook and I sat in the pure dark, my flame the only source of light. He leaned close to me, our foreheads touching.



“Fenswick gave me a potion. I thought your visit was a dream.” I brought my ball of light closer to Rook’s face. His eyes had gone solid black.

“It all happened when I felt Korozoth’s attack. The closer it drew, the worse the agony became. And then, suddenly, I found I could call the night toward me. It was as if every bit of my body had been lit up, except that the light was darkness. I scared the horses a bit. Had to apologize to them with an extra handful of oats.” He laughed. “Used to be that I couldn’t understand why I’d been so cursed. I didn’t realize it was a gift all along.”