Behind Every Lie by Christina McDonald
For Carly. For taking a chance and believing in me.
Also for Emily Doe, and every Emily Doe who’s had their worth, their confidence, and their voice stolen. You are the warriors.
The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places.
—Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms
prologue
WHAT HAVE I DONE?
The thought charged at me, stark and unrelenting. Blood was everywhere. Under my fingernails. In my mouth. In my hair. It was streaked across my shirt. On the floor, it blackened and congealed, filling the air with its metallic breath. The sickly sweet scent clung to the back of my throat.
My mother was slumped on the floor in the living room, mouth gaping, brown eyes staring at nothing. A dark pool of blood seeped from a gaping wound at the base of her neck. The urgent beat of her pulse had faded to an unrelenting nothingness.
Both my hands were clamped around her throat. An emotion thudded so viciously in my chest it was painful, like searing.
“Mom!” I tried to scream.
But only a choked sob came out.
Hail clattered against the windowpanes. The wind thrashed against the house. The living room lights flickered and darkened. Fear, salty on my tongue, shot through me like an electric pulse.
Suddenly I was outside, the night sky pressing on my skin.
The burning scent of ozone scorched the fine hairs of my nostrils, mingling with the pungent scent of wet earth. Black and purple clouds roiled in the night sky. Thunder rumbled ominously. The air crackled with electricity, static lifting the fine hairs along my bare arms. Rain skidded into my scalp, licking at my face.
Tears mingled with the rain on my cheeks as I ran. I was crying so hard I could barely breathe. I skirted the perimeter of the elementary school and pounded toward the park, passing cars parked neatly along the curb. In the distance, a metal statue, the Seattle skyline just beyond.
There was a massive boom, an explosion as I drew level with the statue. Then only light was all around me, inside me, crashing against my retinas, hissing along my nerves, an explosion inside my organs.
I fell to the ground spasming, crippled with pain. Fire engulfed me from the inside, every nerve ending flayed open. I was no longer in control of my brain or body. They had cracked into a million pieces.
And then there was nothing.
Blackness swallowed me whole.
one
eva
LIAM PARALLEL-PARKED on Langley’s main street like it was the easiest thing in the world. Three movements: stop, reverse, straighten. Done. I’d never mastered the skill.
In the distance, a chilly morning wind whipped off the waters of Saratoga Passage, kicking the waves into frothy tips. The snowcapped Cascade Mountains rose in the distance. Scarlet and gold leaves licked the coastline along Whidbey Island. There were no rain clouds yet today, the promise of a crisp fall day held out like a gift.
“My hero,” I teased. “I just need to get you a little black hat and you can be my chauffeur.”
Liam reached into the backseat and grabbed one of the black baseball hats his builders wore. He put it on and grinned. “Your wish is my command, my lady.”
He brushed his lips against mine, pulling me tight against him so I smelled the expensive sandalwood-and-citrus cologne he wore.
“I’m only going to work.” I smiled against his lips.
“I know, but I want more of you, Eva Elizabeth Hansen.” His blue eyes danced as he slid his hands lower down my back.
I laughed and pulled the baseball hat off, running a hand through his hair. It was still thick and sandy blond, not a strand of gray, even though he was more than ten years older than me. “Are you working in Seattle today?”
Liam was a successful property developer with offices in Seattle and here on Whidbey Island. He spent most days in meetings, elbow-deep in profit and loss reports and zoning ordinances, or driving to and from property sites.
“No, I’m here. I have a meeting in an hour, but I’ll be at our new site over in Greenbank after that. My builders got the structure up for the new strip mall so I need to take a look at it before the inspector comes by later this week.”
I raised my eyebrows. “That was fast. I thought you said you didn’t have the building permit yet?”
Liam shrugged. “It’s just a technicality. I know they’ll approve it. Just sometimes the bureaucracy takes time to wade through.” He straightened his navy tie and glanced at his watch. “Don’t worry. I’ll be here to pick you up after work.”
“I have that dinner with my mom and brother tonight, remember?”
“I thought we were going to that Thai place you love over in Coupeville.” Liam said it in that way he had: a statement, not a question.
“No, that’s tomorrow.” I hesitated, unsure of myself. “Right?”
Liam showed me the calendar on his phone. “It’s today.”
“Oh God, I’m so sorry!” I clapped a hand over my mouth. “I totally messed up! Remember I told you my mom won the Seattle Medal of Courage? Andrew organized this dinner to celebrate.…” I bit my lip. “Should I cancel? Maybe I should cancel.”
“No, you should go. You wouldn’t want to disappoint them.”