You Owe Me a Murder(60)

I grabbed his hand. “Would you do that? Keep the monsters away?”

He placed his hand over his heart. “I happen to be the master monster slayer.”

“My dad used to do that,” I said. “When I was little.”

“Kill monsters?”

“He’d go around the room with a flashlight, calling for all the monsters to get out from under my bed or the closet. Then he would use the monster spray.” I rolled my eyes, feeling absurd. “Obviously, it wasn’t really monster spray; it was some kind of air freshener.”

“You don’t know—?the man could have a patent pending on that shit.” Alex kicked his shoes off and pulled his sweatshirt over his head so he had on just a thin white T-shirt. “Now, nothing against your dad, but I like to take monsters out in hand-to-hand combat. Way more manly.” He flexed his arm.

I stood so Alex could slide under the covers. I turned off the lights and then slipped into bed next to him. “Are you sure about this?” I asked softly. I didn’t want to push him, but I wanted him to stay so badly I ached.

“About you, I’m sure.” He pulled me to him so that we were spooned together, his body running the length of mine. Creating a wall behind me, keeping me safe.

“What are people going to say?”

“I’ll leave early before anyone’s up.” We lay silently in the dark. After a few moments, our breathing synchronized. I’d never slept with anyone before. Connor and I had always been scrambling for some place to be alone. His friend’s house, once in his car. His bedroom when his parents were at work. It was always rushed. Lying next to Alex felt more intimate than being with Connor. This was vulnerable in a different way. Alex’s arm was around me, his palm on my waist. His thumb traced the length of my hipbone through the boxer shorts. I wanted to turn and kiss him, to let go of the tension inside me, lose myself in him, in how he made me feel. I knew if I did, I wouldn’t be able to stop. As it was, I felt the core of myself melting at his touch. But I didn’t want us to be together in that way yet, not when Nicki was still between us.

His breath was warm and I could feel the weight of him against me. My eyes drifted shut and I counted our breathing. Then what I thought would never happen did—?I slept.





Twenty-Seven


August 28


3 Days Remaining


The next day I woke up feeling clearheaded for the first time in more than a week. Sunshine was streaming in through the crack in my curtains. I heard the slap-whack of the flip-flops everyone wore to the showers on the wood floors outside in the hallway. We’d overslept.

We were still wrapped together in a warm cocoon in the center of my bed. It was like a blanket fort. Alex was sound asleep, his breath warm on the back of my neck and his hand resting on my thigh.

I shifted slightly and Alex rolled over, his arm flopping above his head. He looked younger sleeping, with his mouth slightly open. I traced his jawbone with my finger, feeling the bristles of his beard coming in, and his eyes fluttered.

“Morning,” I said softly.

“Hey,” he mumbled. He ran his hand through his dark hair.

“Everybody’s up,” I warned him. “People are going to see you leave.”

He sat up. “I can wait in here until everyone goes down for breakfast. Then I’ll sneak back to my room.”

“That will make you late. Do you really want to face the wrath of Tasha?”

He rubbed his chin, his spotty whiskers rasping against his hands. “It’s okay.”

I realized I didn’t really care what anyone else thought. I touched Alex’s face again. “No. Don’t worry about it.”

He stood up and stretched. With his arms above his head, his T-shirt rode up, exposing his stomach. The quick peek of his brown skin against his white shirt made my heart skip.

“Thanks for staying,” I said. “I got some decent sleep for a change.”

He smiled. “That’s me—?I’m a giver. Boring women to sleep is a skill.” He hugged me, holding me for a beat. “I’m glad you slept.” He pulled away, both of us slow and groggy as if hung-over from the intoxication of being together. “I should get going. I’ll meet you downstairs. I don’t even remember what we’ve got on the schedule. You?”

“No—?maybe another museum?” Then reality snapped back into place.

Nicki.

All day long I’d be waiting for her to pop up, demanding answers for what hadn’t happened. But maybe now that my head was clear, I could come up with a better plan to deal with her, could finally think of a solution.

Alex’s shirt was rumpled and his hair stuck up, the soft curls spiking off in different directions.

“I need to talk to you,” I said. Once the words were out, I realized they were true. That had to be my plan. I’d finally tell Alex everything. Not just because I needed the help, which I desperately did, but also because I realized that he mattered to me. I wanted things between us to work out, and they couldn’t if this secret was between us like some kind of bloated, ugly thing. With him I could figure out the best next step. I’d been afraid to involve him, but I needed him. I wasn’t going to sit back and let her control things.

I’d tell him everything. About talking to Nicki on the airplane, about wanting Connor to die, even though I hadn’t meant it. I didn’t want to lose Alex, but there was no way I’d keep him if I continued to lie. I couldn’t be afraid. I had to believe he’d have my back. We’d find a solution together. We’d beat her.