Worth Saving(29)

“I don’t know. I’ll have to cross that bridge when I get there. For all I know, it might not even last that long. I just want to see.”

Layla: Tell me where to meet you.

“Damn, she doesn’t want you to pick her up!” Jason bellows with a laugh. “That’s cold.”

“Shut the f*ck up,” I retort. “She’s guarded, man. It’s hard to get her to open up, so I’m not surprised she doesn’t want me to come get her.”

“Okay, so where are you gonna take her?”

I take a minute to think about it. Layla is a tough egg to crack, so I want to take her to a place where she can relax and let her guard down a little. Something like a bar or a club just won’t cut it. I don’t want to do something as simple as dinner either. I want this date to be memorable. So, I think long and hard before I finally settle on a place.

Me: Danielle Saxton Studio. It’s on Vista Avenue.

“Danielle Saxton Studio? What the hell is that?” Jason asks, his forehead riddled with tiny, confused wrinkles.

I don’t answer, I just smile at him.

“What are you smiling for? Why would you take her to a studio? What are you guys gonna do at a studio, record an album together? What, are you Jay-Z and Beyoncé now?” Jason asks as I get up from my seat and throw my trash away.

“Don’t worry about it, bro,” I finally reply. “You just go pick up Jordan, and I’ll get up with you guys later.”

“Alright, but you better tell me all about this when you get back.”

Again, I don’t answer as we leave the restaurant. Once we’re in the parking lot, we shake hands and head towards our separate cars.

“Hey,” I yell before Jason reaches his rented Chevy Impala. “I’m glad you’re here, bro. It’s good to see you again.”

“It’s good to be here,” he replies with a smile. “I know I’m here working on a case, but we’re gonna kick it, I promise. Let me get stuff squared away with Jordan, and I’ll give you a call later on. Now, go have fun with your new special girl.”

“Yeah, yeah. I got this, bro. I have an idea,” I say, just as my phone chimes in my pocket.

Layla: Sounds good. See you at 7.





Layla

Necklace.

Earrings.

Perfume.

“What the f*ck am I doing?” I say to myself as I stare into the mirror.

My hair falls down my back in loose waves, and my blue dress is tight fitting. I feel like I look pretty good, but I also feel like I’m about to make the biggest mistake ever. What was I thinking texting him like that? This is a horrible idea, but there’s something in me that can’t just call it off. There’s something deep down inside that’s still holding on to hope. That little light in the back of my mind—it’s still there, and there’s something in me that says it’ll burn out if I don’t do this. I need to do something for me. Even though I know it’s a huge risk, I need to take it.

I spent my day off doing the usual, which is absolutely nothing. I thought about getting in touch with Marlene for lunch or something, but I know she likes to hang out with her girlfriend before she has to go to work all night. So? I decided not to go there, which kept me cooped up in the house where my thoughts kept me occupied.

I’m in need of something I can barely explain. I feel like I’ve gone my whole life with only a handful of smiles and just the smallest dose of happiness. When I’m smiling, it’s usually for a customer, so it’s fake. The same can be said for when I laugh. The sound of my actual laugh is so rare that when it does happen I wonder if it’s really even me. “Is that what my real laugh sounds like?” I think to myself every time Austin says something funny. I’m only a month or so away from my twenty-second birthday, and I have no memory of ever celebrating the first twenty-one. Since I was a kid, my life has been a mess, and I’m just now realizing for the very first time that it’s not fair, and I’ve had enough of being unhappy. I’m tired of just surviving—just existing. I want to live. I have to do something for me, and I don’t expect a date with Austin to magically change my entire world in one night, but going out with him and holding an actual conversation is something I need. I need to smile. I need to laugh. I need to live. At least, for one night.

Six-thirty rolls around entirely too fast. My nerves are feeling extra sensitive and my stomach feels like an entire family of butterflies has been set free inside of it, but I’m excited too. I decide to take a taxi, since I have no idea where this place is that Austin wants to take me. I’ve lived here my entire life and I’ve never heard of Danielle Saxton Studio, so I have no clue what goes on there or why he’d want to have a date there, but my curiosity is piqued, at least.

When the taxi rolls up, I take a deep breath before I walk away from the mirror. I tell the bald driver the name of the place and he takes off. The entire ride I wonder what this night might have in store for me. Will he continue on this streak of awesomeness he’s been on since we met? Will he be as handsome as he was before—I mean seriously, can he really look that good all the time? Will I be able to have a conversation with him without totally freaking out about how I might end up breaking his heart? What exactly am I hoping will come from this? I don’t know the answer to any of these questions, but they play in my head on repeat the entire ride.