Worth Saving(24)

As strange as it sounds for me to think anything positive about men right now, before I walk out of the house, I have a thought about Austin. It was just two nights ago that he walked me home, seemingly doing everything he could to put a smile on my face like he could sense I needed it. It was sweet, and it was better than walking alone and being held hostage by my own thoughts of my f*cked up childhood and my unfortunate adulthood. It was nice having his company, even though I’d never let him know that. I’d hate for him to get the wrong impression and start acting differently. Maybe he’s being as nice as he is because he really does want to be my friend. Who knows? Men are weird. Regardless of his intentions, I could use the company, and I know Marlene is asleep, so I wouldn’t want to wake her. So, I go to my kitchen and dig out the number he gave me at IHOP. It only rings once before he answers, sounding like he was wide awake.

“Hello? Who’s this??” he asks, sounding frustrated about the late call only because it’s late, not because it woke him up.

“Hi, it’s Layla,” I reply. When he doesn’t say anything, I decide to say more to jog his memory. “We met about a week ago and you walked me home the day before yesterday. Remember?”

“Oh, I definitely remember, I’m just surprised to hear from you. I was starting to think you’d never call. How are you?” he asks, now disregarding the time.

“I’m okay. Umm, I remembered what you said about calling you if I was having one of those nights that I couldn’t sleep. Umm, tonight is kind of one of those nights, and I was just wondering if maybe you’d like to come take a walk with me. I know it’s late and I totally understand if you’re asleep or busy or whatever, and I’m sorry for calling so late. I know this is a little weird.”

“I’ll be there in less than ten minutes,” he says like he’s already getting up, after which he hangs up. I guess he’s coming.

Ten minutes goes by fast, and Austin pulls into my parking lot at four fifteen. His dark gray Camaro is clean and shiny even in the dark, and I love the way the engine rumbles as he pulls in and puts it in park. When he gets out, he smiles at me and I smile back. He’s wearing blue sweats and a blue Seahawks hoodie, and his hands are shoved inside the pockets.

“Hi,” I greet him as he approaches, still holding that adorable smile. “Thanks for coming. I know it’s a little strange.”

“It’s not strange,” he replies. “Doesn’t bother me at all. I was up anyway. Like I said, I’m a night owl. So, lead the way.”

I don’t really know where we’re walking to, but when I take my first step, I’m not even thinking about it. I’m just walking. I walk out of the parking lot with Austin by my side, and it’s silent at first. Now that he’s here, I’m not really sure what to say, but he doesn’t seem to mind.

“So, how was your day?” he finally asks, breaking the ice.

“Umm, well I just got off work. My life is work,” I reply, but I’m careful not to say too much. I’m not in the mood for being judged or for saying the thing that seems to bring out the worst in men. So, I continue to keep my real job a secret.

“I understand that. It sucks being an adult, doesn’t it?”

“Hell yeah it does.”

“Remember when you were a kid, and you wanted nothing more than to be a grownup because you thought it was gonna be cool? I remember thinking how awesome it was gonna be to be able to stay up as late as I wanted, and to be able to go out without asking anybody for permission. I wanted to drive, and I wanted to make money. I can’t tell you how much of a letdown real life is.”

“I know what you mean,” I say as I stick my own hands in the pockets of my pants. “When I ran . . . moved out of my dad’s house, I couldn’t wait to get my life started. I was out, and I was free to make my own decisions and do what I wanted. I didn’t realize all that meant was that I didn’t have anybody to tell me I was about to do something stupid. Being a grownup isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.”

“You got that right, BFF,” he says with a smile.

“Oh gosh, here we go,” I reply with a giggle. “We’re back on the BFF talk again. We were having a nice conversation reminiscing about being young and dumb, and here you go with the BFF stuff.”

“What? I don’t see anything wrong with us being BFF’s. Do you have some sort of a BFF phobia or something? Are you a BFF-ophobe?”

“Oh my gosh, that’s not even a word,” I say as I laugh out loud. “You’re so goofy. I bet you were a class clown in school, weren’t you? You were that kid who was always disrupting class with your jokes and remarks. I bet you used to piss your teachers off.”

“Absolutely not. I was an angel in school, just like I am now. My teachers in Seattle loved me. Who doesn’t love an angel? Who doesn’t want to be BFF’s with an angel? I’m actually a guardian angel. How do you think I keep popping up wherever you are? I’m your guardian angel, Layla.”

“Well, you’ve done a shitty job, sir. There’s been plenty of times where you could’ve stepped in and I would’ve been very appreciative,” I reply, a little too honestly. I can tell he’s wondering what I’m talking about, and I don’t want to get into anything heavy right now, so I blow past it. “Anyway, guardian angel, you never told me about your day.”