True Colors (The Masks #1)(10)

He let go of my hand with a huff and stepped away from me. “Come on, Caitlyn, a headache, really?"

"Yes, really."

Why would he not believe me?

The rejection he felt last night flashed across his face as he ran a hand through his hair. It was followed by a look of disappointment and then anger again. I couldn’t believe he was letting me see all of this. Chase Mitchell was not the kind of guy to talk about feelings, let alone let them all show. He obviously really wanted me to know how much I’d let him down.

I so did not want to have this conversation right now and I wanted to die instead of ask, but I knew I had no choice. Not with him looking at me with such open anger. “You're mad because we didn't have sex.”

His smile was tight, forced. “Well, excuse me for being disappointed. I thought I was going to get some and it fell through."

"You did not just say get some." I closed me eyes and looked away from him.

His voice went soft as he took my shoulders and gently squeezed them. "I thought you wanted this too.”

"I do, but not when I have a screaming headache. It's my first time. It's a big deal." I finally looked back at him.

His smile was sweet as he tucked a lock of hair behind my ear. "It's just sex, babe."

Mom’s words rang through my head, There's no such thing as just sex. I hate the way people cheapen it like that, and I couldn’t help asking. "Do you love me?"

"What?" He looked incredulous and about ready to gag.

"Do you love me?" I repeated the words slowly.

His chuckle was filled with nervous energy as he rubbed my arm and gently lowered his hands, shoving them into his jean pockets. “We've only been together a couple months, it's a little early to start pulling out the L word, isn’t it?”

"But it's not too early to be screwing each other?”

"What is your problem today?" Once again his voice and face didn’t match. He looked so much more annoyed than he sounded. I squeezed my eyes shut and rubbed my temples, feeling the onset of another throbbing headache.

"We're teenagers, Caitlyn. Of course we want sex." I couldn’t help noticing the way his eyes trailed down my body, hunger obvious in his dark expression.

Hugging the blanket to my chest, I looked at the grass. “You know what? Maybe I'm not ready. I thought I was but...I'm sorry, okay?" I shook my head.

"Yeah.” Chase nodded, looking away. “Whatever. Cool. We can wait." I saw straight through his shrug. He was mondo pissed now and totally lying to me.

For some reason his inability to hide his true feelings really irked me. I snapped and retaliated with my standard sarcasm. “Well if you want it so bad, maybe you should go hook up with someone else."

His face lit with pleasant surprise. "You'd be okay with me doing that? Sleeping with other girls while we were still together?"

My eyes bulged before I could stop them. I stepped away from him, not knowing whether to cry or punch him in the face.

“Babe.” He grinned. “That was a joke.”

"No it wasn't."

He looked confused, surprised that I was able to see that. Guilt flashed over his features and then scuttled away to be replaced by confusion again. I could see his disbelieving smile. He was opening his mouth to convince me I was seeing things. I guess he was right. I was seeing things. Real things. Things I had never noticed before. All of Chase’s sweet comments...the tone of his voice...were all a farce. He wanted me for sex...and that was it. He had been willing to put in a few months of his time to get it, but if I wasn’t going to put out then he wasn’t going to wait around.

“You know what...” I passed the picnic blanket back to him. “You go sleep with whoever you want, because we're not together anymore."

He didn’t really look that disappointed as he took the blanket off me and let me walk away on my own.





Chapter 5




I crossed my arms tightly around my body and stumbled over the grass. As soon as I hit the pavement, I ran. I reached Stella’s house ten minutes later. I wasn’t usually out of breath after running for ten minutes, but I had been crying most of the way, so when Stella opened the door I was a huffing, puffing mess.

“What happened?” Her green eyes were wide as she grabbed my arm and pulled me inside.

“I just dumped Chase.” I finally hiccupped when she sat me down on her bed.

Flicking the door shut, she spun around to face me. “Why?”

“Because he only wanted me for sex.” I sniffed and wiped at my tears. This crying fit was so not helping my headache.

Stella perched on the bed next to me with a Kleenex in her hand. I snatched it off her and blew my nose, dabbing my puffy eyes. My best friend stayed silent as I pulled myself together. Finally I drew in a long, slow breath.

“I mean I know he’s been around a little. I know it was unrealistic for him to actually like me, but I really thought he did. We got on great, you know? I thought sex would have been an added bonus for us, not the be and end all.” I looked up, forcing a watery smile.

Stella sighed, her hand running slow circles over my back. I looked into her eyes and felt my stomach sink. Was she smiling?

I blinked and looked at her again.