The Queen of Bright and Shiny Things(26)

His smile melts me. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“But I thought you weren’t interested in coming to another meeting?”

“That was before I realized how relentless you are.”

My cheeks flush, burning with heat. I can’t meet his gaze, so I stare at his battered army boots instead; yeah, these are totally tan. “I told you I was sorry about that.”

“Hey.” He tips my face up with warm fingers, and for a crazy moment, I think he might kiss me. “I was kidding. I mean, you are hyper-focused, but not in a bad way. I probably need someone who won’t let me hide.” Shane runs his other hand through his tousled curls. “God, somehow you got my life story out of me in one afternoon. I never … I don’t talk to people like that. I just don’t.”

I didn’t even realize it was rare; that’s how right it felt. But maybe he needed to open up … and I was there. Could’ve been timing more than anything to do with me. Still, the glow of satisfaction starts in my toes and radiates all the way up to my neck. I’ve never felt this way before, not this exact combination of giddiness and abject terror.

Shane drops me at my classroom, then takes off for his. Down the hall, I see Dylan and crew lying in wait, but Shane’s smart this time. He spots Mr. Johannes walking ahead and falls into step with him. I can’t hear what they’re talking about, but he’ll get to class without being harassed.

Chemistry is boring but bearable, and luckily, Ryan is all business this time, though at the end of the period, he asks, “Are you coming to the cleanup?”

“Of course. It was my idea.”

“I’m glad.” That’s all he says, but there’s more trembling on the tip of his tongue. He swallows it as I pack up my things and hurry toward the door.

“Sage.” It’s the science teacher, who I never call Tom.

“Yes, sir?”

“I just wanted to tell you I’ve noticed an improvement in your participation in the experiments. Your grade will reflect the additional effort.”

I smile at him. “Thanks.”

“Carry on.”

To my surprise, Shane is already waiting for me outside chemistry. That’s … unprecedented. He must’ve persuaded his teacher to let him out a few minutes early; that’s some impressive smooth talking. God, I hope I’m not beaming the way I feel.

“You can’t continue feeding me every day,” he says.

Wow, not what I’m expecting.

He goes on, “I don’t want you to see me as a stray dog.”

“I don’t!”

“Well, you’re always feeding me. It’s nice, but … things will pick up. Dad’s paying on the hospital bills, and I’m looking for work to help with my daily living expenses.”

“Maybe I can help you find something.”

A frown knits his brows together. “Don’t worry about it, I can handle my own business.”

“But—”

“You can be annoyingly persistent, you know that?” Yeah, he’s aggravated.

I can’t just drop it, though. Seeing Shane now reminds me of when things were the worst for me. My skin itches over at the idea of offering the same indifference I got.

“I’ve kind of been there,” I explain quietly. “I wasn’t old enough to work, but it would’ve been nice if somebody … cared.”

Shane sighs, but there’s a faint softening to his impatience. “Fine.”

“Is there any kind of work you won’t do?” Relief brightens my voice.

He shakes his head. “I can’t afford to be picky. I’d like to buy some groceries.”

“Don’t you get lonely out there?” I ask.

The pause tells me he’s thinking about his answer as we walk. Finally he says, “I’ve been alone a long time. Lately I just have time to notice.”


I guess he means his mom wasn’t much company toward the end and he was run ragged taking care of her. He doesn’t seem to be angry, not like I was. Or maybe he burned it out back in Michigan City when he was staying with his mom’s friend. I ponder whether this guy was her boyfriend, if he loved her after her husband left. It would take a lot of courage, I decide, to fall for someone you know will leave you, sooner rather than later.

He adds, “That’s why I was in the library the other night. I wanted to be near people. It’s really quiet out in the country at night. And, yeah…” His voice drops. “Lonely.”

That feels like big admission. Warmth swells in my chest over the fact that he trusted me with it. As I recall, he was hiding in an upstairs conference room for privacy, but I understand what he’s saying. It’s different knowing folks are nearby, even if they’re not in the room with you. That trailer in the middle of nowhere must be super-creepy at night. And that’s the difference between an empty home and one that houses somebody who loves you.

I nod. “Do you know where we’re going?”

“Not exactly.”

“You can come with me.” Then I realize I have the same problem that I had getting a frap with Lila the other day. I have a bike; Shane does not. So I make the ultimate sacrifice. “Do you know how to ride?”

“A bike?” He looks at me like I’m crazy. “Well, yeah.”