The Fragile Ordinary(88)
My best friend shot me a pleading look. “I’m going to kill her.”
Steph and Andy laughed, and I grabbed Steph’s arm, pulling her away. “Stop teasing her.”
“Why, when it’s so much fun?”
“You suck,” Vicki threw over her shoulder as she marched away.
“Go find Luke. He’ll make it better!” Andy shouted after her.
She flipped him the bird without looking back, making us laugh harder.
“So you saw that, too?” Steph asked Andy. “He seemed into her, right?”
“Oh he fancies her all right.” Andy grinned.
The two of them had their heads together as we walked into the library, and I just knew I was going to have a hard time getting them to study. It turned out they were both the worst gossips ever. Of course, that meant they loved each other. In Steph’s case, I could see as the afternoon wore on, that it was a platonic kind of love. As for Andy, if that glowing look in his eyes when he looked at her meant anything, I sensed unrequited love on the horizon.
*
As useless as my study buddies that afternoon proved to be, they were a good distraction. English was the last class of the day and it was the first time I’d see Mr. Stone since the break. I hadn’t been able to drum up anyone to join the lit magazine among my friends, so I was eager to hear if he’d had more luck finding us a team. I hadn’t had much time to ponder the magazine over the break, between studying and the mess that was my family. Christmas Day had been the beginning of a strange shift in the Caldwell household. My parents had clearly decided to pretend that none of the conversations/discussions/accusations/heartwrenching revelations had occurred. They treated me as they normally would.
However, the change was between them. They barely touched each other, or even looked at one another. They shared a polite friendliness that was completely off. I’d stewed over it during the rest of break, wondering if Kyle and Carrie had argued over our situation. Had it brought up truths neither of them had wanted to face?
It was odd to see them act so distant with one another but I had decided as soon as I realized something had changed between them that I wouldn’t feel guilty about it. I wouldn’t put that on myself.
That didn’t mean I didn’t think about it, however, and that mixed with studying and falling deeper and deeper in love with my boyfriend meant I’d been distracted from the lit magazine project. That had to change. This term that magazine was going to be a priority.
Now, walking to class, my determination to put my attention and focus into the magazine was put on hold when I looked outside the first-floor window I was passing and caught sight of something that distracted me again.
It was Stevie.
He was in the schoolyard walking away from the building. A pang echoed in my chest at the sight of him in a thin sweater, tracksuit bottoms and the scarf and hat I’d bought him. He was wearing it again.
A car pulled up outside the school gate as Stevie approached and Dean Angus got out of it. He and Stevie did some kind of street handshake, and my eyes narrowed on the flash of something that passed between their hands. Had Stevie just given him money?
My stomach flip-flopped again but this time for an entirely different reason. And the feeling only worsened when Stevie got into the car with Dean and it sped off, wheels squealing on the tarmac.
Stevie had made it quite clear again and again that he was in that life now. It didn’t make it any easier to see it or take away my concern for him.
Feeling grim, I continued to English.
“You look a little pale,” Tobias said as I slid into the seat beside him. His brows were creased as he brushed his thumb tenderly over my cheek.
I swear I heard someone somewhere behind us sigh loudly in envy.
That someone was Steph, by the way.
“I’m always pale,” I tried to tease but my smile faltered.
“You sure you’re okay?”
I didn’t want to tell him my paleness was only half due to natural skin pigmentation, the other half due to my worry for Stevie’s situation. Over the past few weeks any mention of Stevie made Tobias close up like a clam, so I’d stopped trying to talk about his cousin.
Mr. Stone walked into class saving me from having to make a decision about whether I should tell Tobias I’d seen Stevie cutting school for Dean. And as soon as class was finished, I told my boyfriend I’d meet him later so I could talk with Mr. Stone about the lit mag. I waited for the class to empty and before I could say anything, Mr. Stone grinned. “It’s ready to go.” He gestured me over to his computer and I waited impatiently for him to log on. “For now, Mrs. Penman would like us to see how popular the website proves before thinking of putting the magazine into print distribution.”
After typing in a web address, our new lit mag website loaded.
A felt a little flutter of excitement in my belly. A red banner across the top of the page and in white One Trick Pony font were the words Free Verse. Underneath was the subtitle “Blair Lochrie High School Literary Magazine.”
“Obviously it isn’t live. And we can change the name if you don’t like it.”
“I love it.” I grinned. “This is amazing. Do we have a team yet?”
“We’re getting there. I’ve got a couple of fourth years interested, and Pamela Perry.”
I tried not to blanch. Pamela was one of Heather’s minions. But, I shrugged it off. If the girl wanted to be part of the magazine, I wasn’t going to stop her. “She knows I’m the editor?” I asked tentatively.