Riding With Brighton(59)
“I don’t care,” I say, pulling him back down to me.
“I’m pretty sure your dad is out there. I can hear his whistling, and he’s banging shit around kind of loudly.”
“Shit,” I mutter, sitting up and grabbing my phone.
“It’s almost two o’clock,” he says.
“Damn, I slept good with you.”
“Your mom’s gonna be pissed.”
“Naw,” I tell him. “I left her that note. She’ll get it.”
“I feel bad.”
“Don’t. It’s all good. But if my dad’s down here banging around in the music studio, I guess that means it’s time to get up.”
“Yeah,” he mutters, and I can hear the stress in his voice.
“You can stay here if you want.” I run my hand over his chest, wanting to hold on and keep him here.
“Yeah, I want. But I can’t put this off. I gotta head home and deal with reality.”
“Okay,” I sigh, my body already taking on some of his anxiety. It sucks that he has to do this. “Do you want me to go with you?”
He laughs. “I don’t think that will help my cause. I mean, it’s one thing for my family to hear the words, but to see me with you right now probably wouldn’t be helpful.”
“It’s gonna be okay. No matter what happens today, it’s gonna be okay.”
“You’re gonna stay with me, right? I mean, when I show up at school on Monday, things are gonna be the same between us, just like they are now. We’re not gonna just be friends or whatever.”
“Nothing’s gonna change,” I assure him. “Right now, you’re all that matters. I’ll do whatever you need me to do.”
“Right now I just need you by my side. I’m scared to even leave you. I don’t know how I’m gonna do any of this without you.”
“Whatever you need from me, I’ll give it to you. I promise.”
He props himself on his arm so that he’s staring at me. “I’m not gonna be like this forever… I mean, so needy and shit. I’m sorry I have to be like this right now.”
“Stop, okay. You’re not needy. This is scary shit you’re dealing with. I’m part of it, Jay. I went through it with you. I feel what you’re feeling. I want to do this with you. If I could go with you today, I would. Don’t worry about me. I want you to need me because I need you too. We’re in this together, all right?”
“Yeah, all right. But can you promise me everything’s gonna be good? I’m gonna go home, my family will have spent the day thinking about how much they love me and how cool it is that I’m gay, and then when I show up at school on Monday, there’s gonna be a morning assembly celebrating my gayness?”
“I guarantee it.”
He stares at me for a minute, then laughs. “All right.”
I watch as he gets out of bed, and as I look at him, I’m struck again by how much I care about the kid. I really wish I could make this all easy and perfect for him.
“Mind if I put your clothes back on?”
“Help yourself.” Climbing out of bed, I throw on my sweats.
He pulls on my jeans, T-shirt, and hoodie, then gathers his baseball clothes in his arms. There’s a sinking feeling in my gut. This is really happening.
I pull on a T-shirt, then cross the room and wrap him up in my arms. “I don’t want to let you go.”
“Really? Because I can’t wait to get the hell out of here and go discuss my sexual orientation with my family.”
“You can come back whenever you want to. I’ll be waiting for you to call me.”
“No matter how shit goes down, maybe I should tell Mickey I got kicked out. I’ve never woken up like that before—my limbs all tangled up with someone else’s, their scent covering me, pretty sure I’m still dreaming until I hear some man whistling Dixie and dropping something heavy on the ground, then cursing for five minutes straight.”
I smile at him. I’m always smiling at him. “I’ve never woken up with someone in my bed either. I like being woken up by your mouth.”
“Okay.” He pushes me off him. “Your dad. Your mom. We need to get out of this room.”
“Yeah, we do,” I reluctantly agree before letting him go and walking out the door.
I can hear my dad banging around in the studio still, so I call out, “We’re up, Dad. You can chill out now.”
“Thank God,” he yells back. “I’m causing some serious harm to your boards in here.”
We head upstairs, and the house is quiet. I bring Jay into the kitchen and hand him a protein bar and pour him a glass of juice.
“Where is everyone?” he asks.
“I’m guessing in the yard. There’s no chance my mom isn’t lurking somewhere nearby.”
“I seriously feel like an asshole for sleeping in your bed last night.”
“Seriously, don’t. I explained it to her. She likes you, and she knows I’m irresistible.”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah… really.” I smirk.
“Is there even a point to me trying to pretend like that’s not true? I mean, if I find some defense to your seductive powers and figure out how to be something other than a lovesick puppy, would you believe it?”