Red(73)

Ginger took a quick step forward, her face crimson with fury, and Felicity thought for a moment that her mom was going to hit her. But Ginger just leaned close to her ear and hissed, “I know exactly what it’s like, Felicity, but unlike some people, I can handle it!”

It took Felicity a minute to figure out what her mom was implying.

And then she finally put the pieces together.

Her mouth dropped open.

“Are you saying—” she stammered. “But … you? You’re a str—”

“Don’t say it out loud,” her mom snapped.

“But I—”

“How do you think it feels to protect a secret for forty-two years, Felicity, only to have it thrown out in the open by the person you love the most?”

Ginger and Felicity both whipped around as the head judge opened the office door. “We’re ready for you now,” she said.

Numb with shock, Felicity followed her mother back into the conference room. She stood before the row of judges, trying not to show that her whole world had just been turned inside out.

“Felicity St. John, the judges have voted to disqualify you from the Miss Scarlet Pageant,” the head judge announced. “In an effort not to humiliate you, this decision will not be made public. You will stand on the stage with the other girls for the coronation. Nobody ever has to know.”

Ginger put her head down on the table and cried as if the world were ending.

Felicity sat on the cold marble floor outside the dressing room, too shocked even for tears. Ever since she was a child, she had thought she was alone in the world, that nobody really knew what her life was like. But there had always been someone who empathized; Ginger had merely opted not to reveal herself. Felicity wondered what it would have been like to grow up knowing that her mom understood her on a deep level. Now it was too late, and she would never know.

Ginger’s words echoed through her mind over and over: everyone will think you’re nothing from now on. Now that the euphoria of outwitting Gabby had worn off, Felicity wondered if she really had destroyed her entire world by outing herself. Spending the next year at Scarletville High as a strawbie would be a living hell. And now, without the prize money, art school would always be just a dream. Her life stretched before her, gray and flat and featureless.

Ivy stuck her head through the doorway. “Brenda wants us to line up soon. Why are you on the floor?”

Felicity wanted to blurt out everything, but her mom’s secret wasn’t hers to tell. “I got disqualified,” she said instead. “It’s all over.”

Ivy shrugged and sat down next to her. “So you won’t be a beauty queen. I think you’ll live. Honestly, I’m relieved you’re out of the running. One fewer person between me and that sparkly, sparkly tiara.”

Felicity gave her friend a feeble smile, but it only lasted a moment. “It’s not about the title. I don’t care about that. But I really needed the prize money.”

“For what?”

“For art school.”

“You want to go to art school? Felicity, that’s awesome!”

“It would have been. But now I guess I’m going to Scarletville Community College. If they’ll even take me.”

“Hang on, what about financial aid?” Ivy asked. “Lots of people go to schools they can’t afford.”

“My mom doesn’t believe in that stuff. Apparently, ‘St. Johns don’t accept charity.’ ”

“Financial aid is not charity. And you’re about to turn eighteen. You don’t need her permission. You can apply for whatever you want. Plus, I’m sure there are merit-based art scholarships. You should ask Ms. Kellogg. And maybe your mom would even help you out with the money a little.”

“She won’t,” Felicity said. “She hates me for what I said up there.”

“She doesn’t hate you. I’m sure she’s pissed now, but she’ll get over it eventually. All you did was stand up for yourself.”

“You should have heard the things she said to me, Ives. It was really horrible. Can I sleep at your house tonight? I don’t even want to see her.”

“Of course. That’s fine.”

The dressing room door opened, and Haylie poked her head out. “It’s almost time, Ivy,” she said.

Felicity moved to get up. “Hays, I was wondering where you were. Do you want—”

But Haylie didn’t even look at her. She just closed the door in Felicity’s face.

Felicity gaped at Ivy. “What just happened?”

“I think she’s having a hard time with this whole thing. She feels like you lied to her.” Ivy picked at her nail, suddenly unable to meet Felicity’s eyes.

“I only lied because of the blackmail. I explained that. And I thought she was over the whole prom nomination thing, anyway. We were totally fine an hour ago.”

“Not about the prom thing. About your hair.”

Felicity felt as if she’d been stabbed with an icicle. “What happened to ‘We’re all in this together and I’ll have your back no matter what’?”

“That’s exactly what I said to her, but she’s so emotional, I don’t think I got through to her at all. And she’s nervous about the coronation on top of everything else. She’ll probably snap out of it as soon as the pageant’s over.”