Rayne & Delilah's Midnite Matinee(27)

“No, rigatoni pasta is named after him. He had to invent rigatoni because his paintings sucked. His pasta was his true masterpiece.”

“It is good pasta. You were saying?”

“?‘Please note Rigatoni’s rendering of the human form…or at least we’re pretty sure that’s the human form. It could also be a shaved dog walking around on its hind legs. Who honestly knows?’?”

I start the video again, and we watch for a while. I cover a yawn, hit pause, and lean forward over the coffee table to type on my laptop. “We should do a segment where our voices and lips don’t match up, like in the movie.”

“It’ll require Arliss to do some work, but I’m into it.”

“He can offset the audio recording for that part. Should be easy. And we’ll make it up to him by cutting his Professor Von Hein—” Another yawn.

“You get any sleep last night?”

“Maybe an hour and a half uninterrupted.”

“Thinking about your dad situation?” Josie gets up to take the kettle corn bowl to the kitchen.

“Dump that in the sink,” I call after her.

“If I leave it, it’ll be there the next time I come over.” She runs water in the bowl and starts scrubbing.

She’s not wrong. “Yeah. Mostly the dad situation.”

“That sucks.”

“What makes it even worse is it’s sent my mom spiraling. She went off her meds at some point, and she’s been doing bad lately. I had to literally drag her out of bed this morning before I went to work.”

“Dude.” Josie comes back in the living room and sits cross-legged on the couch next to me.

“Yeah. Super fun trying to haul someone who won’t talk to you out of bed.”

“She needs to get back on her meds.”

“Well, yeah. But she’s seriously the worst sometimes.”

We stare at the paused TV screen for a moment before Josie picks up the remote with a long sigh. “Might as well get this janky-ass—”

I put my hand on the remote. “Hang on.” I knew I wanted to talk to Josie about this at some point tonight, but I’m taking even myself by surprise. Sleep deprivation. “I really think we need to go to ShiverCon. If we can get something going with Jack Divine, it could take us places.”

“I forgot to tell you. We’re going to Atlanta to visit my aunt that weekend.”

“JoJo. This is, like, an amazing opportunity.”

“DeeDee, visiting Cassie gives me life. You haven’t experienced joy until you’ve stayed up all night bingeing Scandal, eating espresso gelato, and talking smack with my aunt.”

“I know, but listen.”

“I’m listening. What?”

“Your aunt will always be there. We have one chance to meet Jack Divine.”

“I know I’ll have a good time with Cassie. We have no idea if Jack Divine will even give us the time of day.”

“If he doesn’t, he doesn’t, but at least we tried. And if we don’t try, the show keeps plugging along pretty much how it is. And if the show keeps going how it is, you’re—” I can’t finish the thought. I don’t want to say it out loud. I might give the universe ideas.

“I’m what?”

“I don’t know. You’re going to keep getting pressure from your parents to go to UT Knoxville.” I hesitate and then mutter, “You’re gonna go.”

“I told you yesterday. I’m going to UT Martin. I’ll keep doing the show. That’s my plan.”

She says it emphatically, but somehow it doesn’t reassure me. It feels like she’s gripping tight to a slick bar of soap that could suddenly shoot from her hand.

“And what if our show doesn’t take off?” I ask. “Sooner or later you’ll have to move on if you want a career in TV.”

“We can cross that bridge when we come to it.”

I chew on the inside of my cheek, a nervous habit when I’m stressed. “I want to cross the bridge now. Riding on Jack Divine’s back.” My voice has taken on an urgent pitch. I know I sound desperate, and that’s never good when you want something, but it’s hard to hide the desperation.

“DeeDee.”

“JoJo. Plus, I’ve heard there are lots of creepy dudes at cons, and I don’t want to be alone.”

I try to project calm confidence as I don’t want this to seem like as quixotic a mission as it is. I’m not sure I’m succeeding.

But still, Josie says, “Okay. I’ll talk to my parents.”

“I know you’re reluctant.”

“I’ll drive down and visit her another time. But you’re coming when I do because my dad will hate it if I go alone.”

“Deal.”

We stare at each other for a second. Josie wordlessly reaches behind her, grabs a sofa pillow, and bops me in the face with it. I silently sit there and take it. We laugh.

Josie unpauses the movie. “The werewolf in this movie truly does sound like he’s humping people to death.”

“I think it’s kinda hot.”

“Part of me wants to explore that further, but I’m really afraid of what I’ll find.”

As we watch, I start thinking about my dad. I wonder what he’s doing while I’m watching one of the artifacts of our short life together. I think how someday, I want to be good enough—enough enough—that no one who’s held me in their arms under an October night sky ever wants to abandon me.