Mindsiege (Mindspeak #2)(60)
Stroking my hair absentmindedly, he kissed the top of my head again, then held me out just slightly, one hand still resting at the small of my back, skin on skin. “I’ve been spending a lot of time inside your head the last few days.”
I feigned shock.
“You knew?”
“Of course I knew.”
“Did it bother you? Why didn’t you say something?”
I shrugged. “Because it comforted me. I could have shut you out.”
“I know, but—”
“When you first explained how you could hear my thoughts, it bothered me, but then I learned how to shut you out. So, it was my choice.” I looked away again. “Having Jonas inside my head isn’t comforting at all. And the thought of Ty or anyone I don’t know inside my head is making me crazy. I don’t know what they’re doing or when they might make me do something against my will. Dani is so upset. They made her shoot a gun at someone, Jack. I know how she feels. I have to find a way to get that thing out of her.”
“Well, I’ve been studying your mind. I’ve studied how neurons fire and how brain activity behaves when I’m inside your head. I’ve seen how it’s different when I’m touching you versus when I’m not. Or even when I’m across campus. I can tell when you’re sleeping. I know when you’re freaking out and when you’re happy.” He paused.
Bothered by the silence, I glanced up at him. “Go on.”
“I also know when Jonas is inside your mind.”
“You do? Because I can’t always tell. It takes quite a bit of effort to monitor my own mind. I sense when you’re there. I sometimes sense when Jonas is there, but mostly he slips in and out undetected.”
Lexi? I could hear a huge tension in his words. Jonas is always inside your head.
My eyes widened. But then I remembered Jonas’s presence earlier at the same time Jack had been touching me and roaming around in my brain. Jonas’s invasion had looked like tiny specks of darkness among lots of light. My pulse began to race. Is he there now? Can he hear everything we’re saying?
Jack shook his head. “I’m almost positive he can’t.”
“Almost?”
The pressure of Jack’s palm to my back intensified. He reached down with his other hand and threaded his fingers with mine. “He gets visibly frustrated when I touch you. At first, I actually thought he was trying to get close to you. After you two returned from campus that night, and he had kissed you…”
“And after I gave him a black eye,” I reminded him.
“Yes, that, too.” Jack shifted feet, keeping physical contact with me. “But I noticed him looking at you differently, and I couldn’t figure it out. He reacted to you differently after that. Thankfully, I had already decided to get you away from him. But then he showed up at Wellington.”
“Ty or the IIA was controlling his mind. I was forced to heal Sandra.”
“Exactly. Jonas began acting like he knew what was best for you. I was insanely jealous at first. I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what he wanted.”
“Wait a minute. Are you saying that you no longer trust Jonas?”
Jack looked away from me. “Not exactly. I just don’t know. I’m wondering if we can afford to trust him if we’re not sure.”
“But how do you know he can’t hear everything we’re saying right now?”
“Ty. He made a huge mistake when he told us I was your shield. Now Jonas is being more careful and less obvious with how he invades your mind.”
“You’re wondering if Jonas has truly been deserted by Sandra and the IIA.” I said the thing I’d been thinking ever since I’d healed Sandra and she’d fled the facility.
“Exactly. So, I’ve been watching. And today—”
“Maybe that bullet was meant for Jonas.” Jack’s expression remained unchanged as I said out loud exactly what he was thinking. “Just maybe… whoever controlled Dani’s mind ordered her to shoot Jonas, not me. And that person knew the bullet would not kill or even hurt Jonas badly.” Maybe it was even Jonas who was inside Dani’s head. He had proven he could get in and out without the host body knowing.
“I think he knows I’m starting to not trust him. I also think he staged saving your life in order to win it back.”
I stared out across campus again, mentally exhausted from wondering who was manipulating my mind and who was my friend. “What do we do?” I asked. “I can’t ignore Sandra’s demands to give myself over to her by tomorrow, and I’ll need Jonas to get me inside.”
So, we get closer to Jonas. He won’t be able to hide his true intentions forever.
~~~~~
Jack held my hand, rubbing his thumb over my skin. We walked along the sidewalk behind the bombed classroom building. I was amazed by how well Dean Fisher and President Wellington had kept knowledge of the incident covered up. Had this been a public school, Wellington would’ve been a media circus.
Eventually, Jack would have to let me go, therefore breaking his protective shield. We couldn’t spend the rest of our lives joined in some way, as nice as the prospect of him touching me forever sounded now. But we had to push forward with our plan to get Addison back and rid both Addison and Dani of the trackers embedded at the bases of their brains.