Kissing Ted Callahan (and Other Guys)(58)

“There’s a cute receptionist at my therapist’s office,” Reid says, and I laugh really hard.

“I missed you so much.” It’s not the kind of thing I’m used to saying to him, but he doesn’t give me a look like I’ve gone Hallmark card sentimental on him.

“Yeah, Ri, you too.”





CHAPTER SIXTY-ONE


Reid and I buy a big metal trash can and lighter fluid, and we play CeeLo’s “Fuck You” through my iPod over Reid’s portable speakers, and we totally burn the book. Then we high-five and go out for waffles.





CHAPTER SIXTY-TWO


Within a few days, the plan has been made for me—literally, Lucy has told me what I have to do—but instead of approaching Ted, I stare at him from behind my open locker door.

“Does he look heartbroken?” I ask. “Like that he could cry?”


“He looks how he always looks,” Lucy says. “Just go over.”

“He looks a little heartbroken,” Reid says, and I punch his arm.

“He always looks like that,” Nathan says.

I punch him, too. Nathan’s a lot stronger than Reid, so it’s less satisfying, except for that I have long dreamed of punching Nathan. We didn’t officially make up or talk, but it turns out Nathan and I can just kind of get along when it’s called for.

“Seriously, I can’t believe you’re stressing over that guy,” Nathan says.

“I am in love with that guy,” I say. “And he deserves better than me.”

“Don’t wimp out now,” Lucy says sternly.

Ted has to walk past us, and Lucy takes that opportunity to LITERALLY SHOVE ME in his direction. I smile at him, but he doesn’t respond in any manner, so I turn back to look at Lucy.

Follow the plan! she mouths.

“Hi,” I try. Step 1!

“Hi, Riley,” he says.

It worked!

“I, um, I wrote you a note,” I say. Step 2! “I know you might not want to read it, and you totally have every right. But I wanted to explain some stuff, so, anyway.”

I take it out of my pocket and hold it out toward him. Step 3! If he doesn’t take it, I promise myself very sternly I will gracefully walk away. (Step 4A!) But Ted looks right at me and takes the note. (Step 4B!) “Okay.”

“Okay, I’m going to…” I kind of back away from him, and I turn once it seems like I’m walking backward for a weird length of time. “Bye, Ted.”

He doesn’t say anything, so I keep walking down the hallway. But at last I hear it, very softly, mixed in with the noise of the school: “Bye, Riley.”





CHAPTER SIXTY-THREE



Dear Ted,

I’m seriously so sorry for being such a liar and a weirdo. I wish I could take back all of it, but that would involve magic or time travel and I have access to neither.

Earlier this year I was so scared of losing my friends and my band, and I made some stupid decisions. I liked you before then, and then you just kind of got roped into this whole plan of mine and Reid’s.

You’re seriously the smartest, nicest, funniest guy I have ever met. I love your mix CD ability and your messenger bag. I like how when we talk I feel like I’m the most important person ever. I think it’s super kick-ass that you run the Fencing Club, and do you remember the time I called it the Fenching Club? It was only because I was so nervous to be around you because I had the biggest crush in the world on you, and I couldn’t function normally.

I want to be upfront and say I really want to get back together with you. I know I lied and hurt you, and I can’t take that back. I screwed up. I’m seriously so sorry, Ted--not just because I lost you but because I don’t want to be a bad person.

The Gold Diggers are playing at the Smell on Saturday night. There’s going to be a special song for you, so I hope you will come hear it. And if you don’t, I will understand.

Love+apologies+everything,

Riley





CHAPTER SIXTY-FOUR


We’re crowded into the Smell’s tiny greenroom staring at our set list and making sure we look as cool as possible. I wish Reid wasn’t wearing A BLAZER and I can tell from Lucy’s expression she agrees, but I guess this is his thing now.

“We should look out to see if he’s here,” Reid says.

“I would bet he isn’t,” Nathan says.

“Nathan, come on,” Lucy says.

“Not because of Riley breaking his heart. Just, I can’t imagine that guy here.”

“He’s pretty rock-and-roll,” Lucy says. “He was fun at the Andrew Mothereffing Jackson show, remember? He’ll come.”

“YOU GUYS ARE WAY TOO INVESTED IN THIS,” I say in a voice I meant to be calm. “CAN WE FOCUS ON WHAT’S IMPORTANT, PLEASE.”

“He’ll come,” Lucy says again.

“This set list is solid,” Nathan says. El presidente rises again! “And I didn’t want to freak you guys out, but—well, we’re in this together. I’ll just tell you. My cousin helped me get in touch with this guy, and he’s coming tonight, and if he likes us, he’ll think about managing us.”

We stare at him, and I want to yell at him for springing this on us, but I know for Nathan this is the best he can do, and I get it. Also we are going to have a great show, and this dude is going to love us. At this very moment it seems possible, and not just because right now almost anything seems more probable than my—well, Lucy’s—plan actually working.