Don't Kiss the Messenger (Edgelake High School, #1)(67)

Shit. What was she doing there?

Jealousy trickled its way into my blood. I had made a pact with my emotions that I would never feel jealousy toward Bryn again, but there she was, relishing in the aftermath of our emails. Stealing what rightly belonged to me.

The cold winter wind whipped against my face. I wrapped my jacket hood over my head and started to head back to The Church. The sidewalk was starting to blur in my spinning thoughts.

Shit! The emails.

I grabbed my phone. I couldn’t find Bryn’s number fast enough. It rang once and no answer.

Two rings, no answer.

“Hello?” Bryn’s voice whispered in a rush. Were they already in his bedroom? Was he on top of her? Was she breathless after breaking apart from a deep, passionate kiss? I shook my head to clear the images.

“CeCe?” Bryn whispered.

“Bryn. Where are you?” I asked. I played dumb.

“I’m at Emmett’s. He asked me to come over. What’s wrong? You called me.”

“Why are you whispering?” I asked. “Is Emmett right there?”

“No, I’m in the bathroom. What is it?”

I took a breath of relief. “Has he mentioned any emails?” I asked.

“Emails?”

“Yeah, did he bring up the emails?” My voice sounded higher, pinched in my throat.

“I just got here and his roommates are around. We haven’t talked yet.”

I lifted my face to the ceiling. “Thank God.”

“But now that you mention it, he is acting a little weird. What happened?”

“Emmett and I have been emailing.”

She laughed. “It’s no big deal, CeCe. I figured you would a couple times.”

I tapped my foot nervously on the ground. “Well, it was more than a couple of times.”

“How much more?” she asked.

I winced. “Nine or ten times. A day.” I added.

“What?!” she managed to scream in a whisper.

“Sometimes more.”

I heard the phone crash and I was afraid she threw it against the wall.

“Bryn? Bryn?!”

“Hey, I dropped the phone in the sink. You emailed him nine or ten times a day?”

My chin sunk down to my coat. “Yes.”

“Shit, shit, CeCe. Why?”

“I got carried away. There’s not a lot to do in Wisconsin in the winter.”

I rolled my eyes at my lame excuse.

It was so much more than that. I was baring my soul. I was connecting on levels and planes and dimensions and matters that I didn’t even know existed. It was playing a game with no rules, no boundaries, and no referees blowing the whistle, telling you when you crossed the line. Love was completely foreign to me. This strange, altered universe I wasn’t sure I belonged in.

Bryn laughed and her easiness surprised me. I knew I couldn’t hold a candle to her looks, but wasn’t she jealous at all? Didn’t she realize there were more ways to connect to someone than physically? Any girl with a thread of emotions would get pissed if another girl was emailing her boyfriend. Something didn’t fit.

“CeCe, you’re such a ding-dong.”

I was confused. Was that Bryn’s sweet natured way of saying I was a fucking asshole?

“What?” I said.

“It’s no big deal, okay? But thanks for the heads up. I’ve got to get out of the bathroom now. They’re going to think I’m taking a you-know-what in here.”

She hung up and I stared at my phone with disbelief. That was her concern?

…

EMMETT

“Hey gorgeous,” Bryn said when she walked out of the bathroom.

I grabbed her arm and took her upstairs. I wondered what expression she read on my face Resounding joy? Desperate longing? Lust. Love? Any doubts I had about us over the last month had vanished. Our emails had set my mind straight on how I felt about Bryn. Now I just needed to confess.

We got up to my room and I shut the door. I finally had all of her, here in front of me. She sat on the edge of my bed and looked up at me and smiled.

“Wow, you look really ho—”

I interrupted her. I wanted to start where our emails left off. No more games. No more awkward interactions.

“You know what’s happened since you’ve been gone,” I said.

“We’ve been emailing?”

I smiled.

“A lot?” she added.

I leaned over her and pressed her down against the bed. She curled her fingers through my hair. I looked into her eyes, drinking her in, overwhelmed that my feelings were so strong they made my breath shake. I was amazed this girl was mine, perfect and beautiful and complicated. I loved her mind, every thought she had, her confidence, her hidden insecurities.

“I started falling for you the first moment I saw you,” I said. I swallowed. “But that was just with my eyes. Then I got to know you. And you started to let me in. The past few weeks I fell completely. I’m in love with you, Bryn.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. I ran my hand over her cheek, down her neck. I looked in her eyes for the fire I knew would be there.

“Is that too much?” I asked.

“No, it’s really sweet.”

“Sweet.” I laughed. “It’s terrifying.” My hand was shaking, touching the skin that I had been craving for weeks. I slid my hand under her back and pushed her tighter against me. She answered by arching her back to my touch. She never had a problem speaking this way.