An Uncertain Choice(32)

“Shall I don rags and roll in the dirt?” I retorted. “Will I meet with your approval then?”

He didn’t respond. Except for the slap of our steps, silence crept around us. And I couldn’t help thinking that even though the three knights were in a contest to win my approval, somehow things had gotten turned around so that now I hoped to win his.

I chanced a sideways peek to see if I’d offended him. He glanced at me at the same moment and gave me one of his cocked grins. “Don’t worry, my lady. If you want to roll in the dirt, there’s no need to don rags. You can do it in your current attire.” He glanced then at the dirt that caked the road and was now turning muddy in the mist.

“I’ll do it, but only if you’ll join me.”

His grin quirked higher and his eyes flashed with appreciation for my wit.

I tried to hold back a smile of my own but failed dismally. I was surprised by how much I liked him, and I could no longer pretend indifference.

He stopped suddenly and faced me, his smile fading and a new seriousness taking the place of his mirth. “You’ve shown yourself to be a kind ruler. I can see now why your people love you.”

“I only wish I could do more for them.”

“Yes, there’s a great deal more you can do.”

His blunt honesty took me aback and left me speechless for a moment. I was used to the abbot reminding me of how much I already did and how my people couldn’t possibly expect more.

The rain began to fall harder, and we resumed walking.

“The duke said that I’m a compassionate leader, that no one else could rule them better than I. Are you contradicting him?”

“No, my lady. Not in the least. They’re blessed by God to have so kind a ruler.”

“But you still think there’s more I can do for my people?”

The rain pattered against the dirt road and sent splatters of mud against my gown. The wimple covering my hair was beginning to grow damp.

“The kind acts you perform are very necessary. And they most certainly please God. But . . . you’ve been putting small bandages on a large, festering wound. Perhaps you must now consider how you might eliminate the wound altogether — ?or at the very least diminish it.”

Again, I was unprepared for his honesty, but I couldn’t fault him for it.

When the rain turned into a complete downpour, he lifted his face to the sky and let the drops pelt him. I could only watch him with wonder, trying to grasp the implications of all he’d spoken. Was there more I could be doing to help my people? If so, what?

As if realizing where he was and that I was garnering a soaking too, he reached for my hand and wrapped his fingers around mine in a strong, warm grip. “Come. We must make haste. I must deliver you back to the castle before you’re drenched.”

I didn’t resist as he tugged me along. I had to half-run to keep up with him, but for a reason I couldn’t explain, I was utterly happy. With my fingers against his and the loveliness of our time together warming my heart, I felt happy and free.

By the time we raced across the drawbridge, we were both breathless and laughing. We didn’t stop until we crossed into the gatehouse. Finally out of the deluge, we could only stand gasping for air. Sir Derrick’s brown hair was plastered to his head, and rivulets of rain ran down his face. His clothes were soaked and dripping. My gown was likewise, and strands of my hair stuck to my cheeks and neck.

Even though I surely resembled Pup after one of his baths, I wasn’t self-conscious. I wasn’t sure whether it was because Sir Derrick still held my hand or because he was smiling down at me. Whatever the case, I didn’t want to break the contact with him.

As our breathing finally steadied, I could hear the rain pattering against the stone gatehouse with a lyrical rhythm. He dropped the basket to the ground and lifted his hand to my cheek. His fingers hovered for only a moment before he gently peeled a blond strand from my skin. My pulse sped to the same beat as the rain.

His smile faded, replaced by an intensity I couldn’t understand but that filled me with greater urgency to know this man standing before me, to discover his deepest longings and fears, his past struggles, his present enjoyments, and his hopes for the future. I had the desire to reach out to him and comb a wet strand from his face, just as he’d done to mine.

But the sudden calling of my name from the outer bailey startled me. I stepped away from Sir Derrick, breaking the contact and forcing him to release my hand.

“Lady Rosemarie,” called my porter as he ran through the downpour toward me, the rain pelting off his bald head and wide shoulders.

Even though I’d broken the physical contact with the knight, I couldn’t break the hold his eyes had on me. His eyes, the color of the solid stone walls, encompassed me, drew me in, and refused to let me go.

Only when James stood next to me, his hulking frame towering over me, did I force myself to glance away.

“Your nursemaid has been sick with worry, my lady,” James said with a bow. “She sent me to fetch you and bring you directly to your chambers.”

“You may tell her I’ll be along shortly.” I wasn’t ready to leave Sir Derrick just yet.

“She said I wasn’t to return without you.” James hunkered away from the castle as though he expected Trudy to come running after him with a broom in hand. “She’s concerned that you may take a chill from being out in the rain.”